Midnight
by xxbloodsweattearsxxx
Summary: Twilight AU. Role Reversal. Edward Swan is the new student at Forks High School and his blood sings to one particular female vampire of the Cullen family: Isabella Cullen. Canon Storyline/Chapters.
1. First Sight

A/N: This is my first attempt at doing a reverse role story, inspired some by the partial draft of Midnight Sun(There will be some MS like references, I warn. Especially in this first chapter during the biology lesson) The names are the same for the **most** part as is the canon storyline with minor altercations(It wouldn't be fan fiction if it was a perfect replica of the original, neh?)

I will say this. I'm changing some lore around regarding Meyer's version of the typical vampire.

Tell me what you think.

* * *

><p><em>"But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil,<em>

_thou shalt not eat of it:_

_for in the day that thou eatest thereof_

_thou shalt surely die."_

-Genesis 2:17

Humans call it napping. Sleeping on the job. Getting some shut-eye.

It's what I wished I could do, right about now. But alas, I could not. Even if I really wanted to. Instead, I had to listen to a tumult of voices crowding around in my head like fire ants, each one the same pitch of excitement.

There was only a few people that were an exception to my gift, but only because I wanted them to be. I ignored the buxom blonde Rosalie to my left, leaning all to comfortably into her black-haired giant hulking husband-Emmett. Today was special because they were celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. What better way to celebrate that by having another private ceremony after school ended today? Ick. Rosalie's mind was tumbling with visuals of the new bridal gown she had bought. Pretty soon this woman was going to have as many weddings as there were years in my existence on this planet.

To the same man, mind.

Or the same _vampire_, I should say.

Rosalie was beautiful in her own way, different from mine, as I was told. She thought herself statuesque with her golden locks trailing down her back and her petite body. She had large, prominent blue eyes that she only enhanced with makeup that really did her no good as she was already the 'fairest' of them all in this cafeteria.

Emmett was taller than Rosalie with a muscular build and curly dark hair. He had hands nearing the size of two trash can lids. Which was probably an exaggeration on my part. His mind was considerably less vain than Rosalie's usual ramblings.

Today, he was firing off anticipation for the football game that would be on later. After he had appeased Rose, of course.

There was also Alice and Jasper, directly across from me was Alice. She was monitoring her surroundings with much enthusiasm. Her short inky black hair was going to near disarray and her dark forest green eyes were going to shift to white if she didn't stop trying to give every passerby of our table one of her heart-breaking smiles. A play for the other students who might have looked our way. Which was pointless, considering almost no one bothered looking at the Cullens. Her thoughts were welcome and happy that everyone else was excited, or perhaps Jasper was keeping her that way.

He met my gaze evenly. I leaned back in my seat and crossed my legs along with my arms, giving him an accusatory glare. He stared back, defiant, running his fingers through his short honey-colored hair and fixing me a half-smile to show how devious he really was. Alice stepped up to be the first to throw her food away, walking like a dancer across the linoleum where she dumped the tray then glided back to us, giving my shoulder a squeeze before sitting back down.

Unlike my 'siblings', I was different from them. We all had our unique gifts, which usually came with our species as a whole.

Alice had the ability to see the future. Rather, she saw the future of the current road an individual was on. If they changed their mind, the whole future shifted and the vision changed as well.

Rosalie had her vanity. That wasn't a gift, she was just vain. More than she should have been.

Jasper was an empath. He could shift the emotions of anyone to his own desired emotion. You could be angry as a starving dog and he could make you docile with his presence. A useful ability but not without its drawbacks. Some people liked being angry.

Emmett had his brute strength. He wasn't that muscular or that big for show. Getting into a wrestling match with him and winning was as easy as stepping into the ring with four giant grizzly bears at once. You weren't going to win.

And then there was me. Isabella. Ever since I rose into immortality, I had the ability to read the minds of every human I had ever encountered. A useful ability considering as years went by, the human psyche changed as well. The lies of the spoken tongue piled up more proficiently and it was useful in finding the truth behind a crook's smile.

The kids here were all too intimidated by us. Our beauty, our general anti-social behavior and not to mention, we certainly acted the part of snooty rich kids.

I leaned forward and eyed the meal I had just purchased for three dollars and fifty cents with some disgust. I had grown past the time where I wanted to eat human food as part of the facade.

I glanced over my shoulder and caught my own reflection off the glare on a freckled girl's glasses. My eyes were shining with cold obsidian, and dark circles were forming underneath my eyes like bruises. I still looked stunning. It wasn't hard to guess that I'd always have that. My full red lips, my intoxicatingly dark brown eyes. My pale skin(slightly olive toned right now because of my lack of nutrition) which mirrored my siblings, paler than normal but flawless nonetheless. My body was about as slender as Rosalie's, athletic and tall but not too tall. Emmett still towered over me. But the signs around my eyes were a clear indication.

I was thirsty.

Already my gaze had melted from one of controlled boredom to blind thirst and I was eying the girl's exposed neck. What a perfect place to stop and have a chat while debating where to sit down. I zeroed in on the tracery of the veins at her throat, mesmerized at how the pulsed when she moved her head while talking. It would be so easy. There was a dry ache starting in my throat. All the muscles in my body tightened for the spring I could so easily conduct. Venom flowed in my mouth, nearly suffocating me.

Alice kicked me underneath the table with surprising force. My knee actually ached for a moment when I broke out of my stupor and looked back to her.

_I saw that, Bella._ She said, her voice mirroring disapproval in my head.

"I didn't," I answered out loud with a lick of my lips while my thirst began to die. Rosalie also broke out of her train of thought and ogling of Emmett to glare between us. She hated this about Alice and me, our silent conversations. It made her feel very left out. Like what more could be more interesting than how fabulous Rosalie looks today?

The girl had noticed nothing in the few minutes she and her companion were standing there. Not noticing at all that she had a near encounter with death today. They giggled as they passed my chair and I swallowed the stinging venom with a burn in my throat more pronounced than ever before.

_You should have hunted with Rosalie and Emmett yesterday, _chastised Alice.

"Yeah, right," I muttered with a sneer. Really? With those two? Did she not realized what they did when they were on a hunt together? It didn't matter if there was a third party or not. The two of them...ugh, it was gross.

_Then you should have hunted with Jasper and I the day before._

Maybe.

_It's just going to get harder as the day progresses and you know it._

Maybe.

I'd done a lot worse in my day. My grand score was going a full five months without feeding. We needed blood to survive, not to live. Though the five month trial was well over forty years ago. With Carlisle, my maker and adoptive "father" having methods of dieting, feeding off the blood of animals was to be done weekly to keep us well-fed and nourished so we wouldn't do or think what I was thinking right now.

I turned my mind to other things, letting the stream of internal chatter that everyone was going through invade my mind once more. Which was never comforting. But at least I got rid of having to see Alice's repeated vision in my head of me mangling a girl in front of the whole A lunch crew. If that was her idea of warning me...

The school was so small, that a new kid was a big deal, whether it was for underclassmen or upper. Like the whole school was an elaborate gang and everyone had to know everyone.

The new boy was nothing special except that his hair was actually a peculiar shade of bronze and slightly untidy in its shape. He had large green eyes much like Alice's and pale skin. I hadn't seen him directly but now I could get a clear view of him at what was supposed to be the popular Juniors' table. His name was Edward Swan and he was the police chief's only son. His pride and joy. There was the generically popular Jessica Stanley with her wild, curly dark hair that reminded me of Emmett's.

There was her counter part, sandy haired Mike Newton. Ah, Mike. He had classes with both Rosalie and I and hadn't decided which of us he liked better. He fantasized about both of us. Rosalie, who was used to getting those open-mouthed stares, didn't mind. But I did, especially since I could see what was in his head when he thought them. Rosalie loved the attention that she got, and while I was mostly used to it, sometimes the things humans thought about us disturbed me.

Right now he was leaning down on the new kid, sitting inappropriately on the cafeteria table while he explained the girls of the junior year to him.

_Course he's lookin' at the Cullens. _

My surname caught me. I looked over without shame to find the boys of the table looking our way. The new one in particular. I met his gaze with a somber, calculating expression. Strange, I hadn't heard him mention anything about us internally. I raised a perfect eyebrow at him before turning my attention back to the family when Edward Swan proceeded to speak aloud about us.

"Who are they?" The boy had asked. His voice was very soft and a bit more hesitant than Mike's. I suppose that came from being new and the biggest eye candy for the rest of the school. Naturally the only table that showed no interest in you would suddenly become fascinating.

I tried to brush his mind purposely then without actually looking at him, just stretching out. I could feel Mike all too clearly and his cold, possessive response.

_You don't stand a chance, bro. None of us do._

"Those are the Cullens. The hot blonde ones name is Rosalie," I could do without the mental picture of Rosalie wearing her black short shorts in gym and white tee, both about two sizes two small for her. " The one with the short black hair is Alice. And the dudes are Emmett and Jasper. Emmett and Jasper are Rosalie and Alice's boyfriends. They're all like...together."

"Except for...?" Edward was asking, and I could feel his gaze on me.

I chose this moment to address Rosalie. " We're being watched. Why don't you two stop acting like you're going to suck eachother's faces off at any moment?"

Rosalie tore her gaze from her husband to glower. "Get stuffed, Bella. Go eat a rabbit or something and stop making the rest of us miserable."

Emmett just laughed and reached across Rose to pat my shoulder which would have sent me head first into the table had I been human. "You're no fun, kid."

Jasper smiled at me across the table. He was actually our newest, and I warranted the way I was feeling was how he did on a daily basis. I had a desire to throw my tray at him, but instead I stood up and threw my untouched food to its correct place within the trash.

"She doesn't date," Mike was concluding out loud when I tuned back into that conversation. I did look at Edward again then. It was meant to be a curious look, but his bright green eyes widened and he purposely took a heavy sip of his chocolate milk. I could tell he was surprised by just what I was wearing which wasn't normal high school clothing. I was wearing a tight black dress that didn't quite reach my knees and high heels. The only thing stopping my dress from leaving little to the imagination was the black jean jacket I had donned to give off the look that I was shielding from the rain.

A lot of other students were following my lead, as lunch was about to be over in five minutes anyway. Rosalie and Emmett were having a mini food fight on their way to the trash, throwing bits of strawberry at one another while she giggled loudly.

"She's very pretty," was all Edward had to say on the matter. While I pretended to wait for Jasper to come back from dumping his tray at our table, I tried to tune out everyone else in the cafeteria for a moment. A difficult feat, but one I had mastered quite well. Edward's voice was quite distinct from everyone else who was obsessing over what they wanted to do next with him. Some girls were thinking up random excuses to walk with him to his next class even if it wasn't the same as theirs. It was easy to tune it all out...I tried to pick up on his voice in the midst...

But I couldn't. Not a sound.

That wasn't good. That was definitely not good. That never happened. Maybe he wasn't thinking at all. But how was that possible? Maybe I was losing my touch.

"Shall we then?" Alice was saying, lacing her arm through mine. A curious notion on her part. We were playing the part of juniors though, so we parted from Rosalie, Jasper and Emmett quickly, heading in the opposite exit then us.

She was about head the other direction of the hall that I was going to which would lead me to the boringness of Biology.

"Bella," She said out loud, unlacing her arm and looking dead into my eyes. I stared back, raising an eyebrow. I waited for her to speak, but she only looked at me. The bell rang over head and she abruptly turned away, heading down the hall without a backward look at me.

I suppose this was Alice's way of conveying her worry for my lack of feeding. Woman was _so_ annoying sometimes.

I entered Biology and took my usual place at the empty lab table. Everywhere else there was two to a seat. Since people generally stayed away from the Cullens, this wasn't abnormal.

Mike had tried to switch partners with pimple-skinned Eric Yorkie a few times to get a seat with me, but I had told the teacher, Mister Banner, I didn't want a new partner and I preferred to do the labs by myself anyway. Banner had said that in the event that they received a new student, I wouldn't have this privilege anymore. I considered this very unlikely and enjoyed my privacy.

However, Edward Swan entered the classroom along with new buddy Mike Newton. He was laughing about something and I could hear him quite clearly. I looked over my shoulder and watched as he walked the aisle between desks towards the teachers desk. Ah, so I was going to get a partner now. How interesting. Especially since at the moment, it seemed Edward was thinking nothing.

All of that changed when he passed my desk.

_Everything_ changed then.

A blast of heat burst through all my senses. The sweetest blood I could have ever hoped to be near in my life.

The human facade I had been encased in shattered like glass. If I was in a dangerous place in the lunch room, it was nothing compared to how I was now. My predator instincts overshadowed all of my basic human ones that had kept me from embracing the killer I had once been so long ago.

All gone now.

Venom filled my mouth and my muscles tightened. My feet were already on the ledges of the stool, my body automatically reacting beyond my normal control to leap off the desk and take him in my arms. His protests would be weak, weak as caressing fingers on my iron grip.

There hadn't even be a second between us while I thought of all this. He was now at the teacher's desk showing his schedule to Banner. I couldn't allow Mister Banner or the twenty odd students in this classroom live with what I was planning to do. The bell had rung and all who were supposed to be here were here. I had to kill them all if I wanted to drain the damned human in peace.

Damned, I could have laughed aloud at that if I was capable of rational thought at that moment.

Mister Banner was pointing to the seat next to me. When Edward turned to me, I felt my shoulders raise and my body sort of cave in on itself. He gave me a tentative smile while I closed my eyes, sure that the dark onyx of them had melted into dark red, a natural reaction to fresh blood. Except Edward Swan was not bleeding and he had already slid into the stool beside me. I couldn't look at him, yet he was looking at me, curious at my frozen position.

Curious. All he was was curious. Haha.

Mister Banner was already launching into an explanation about an overview of Cellular Mitosis which I neither cared for nor acknowledged.

Instead I turned to meet his gaze and saw him flinch in shock at me. I didn't know what he saw there until I saw it reflected back in those piercing green eyes. It was me, my face contorted with hunger and bloodlust, my mouth open and my teeth bared. My eyes were no longer red, but black with utter revulsion and hatred. He was staring fixedly at the teacher, I knew. He wasn't the type to blatantly ask why someone was glaring at them. He wasn't that rude.

Because I did hate him that much right now. He had done nothing verbally, nothing physically. Yet I hated him more than I hated anything in my life.

Deep down, I knew my hatred for him was not true. Not just. The one I really loathed was myself.

I inhaled deeply, when his scent washed over me in a haze of crimson. The overpowering desire to sink my teeth into his throat was eminent. I could see the veins in his neck, much more prominent then the girl in the cafeteria. It made my breathing hitch and if my heart was beating, it'd be racing, pumping adrenaline like acid.

I stopped breathing altogether, which was beautiful. Truly beautiful. The murderous act I was on the verge of committing went to the back of my mind...For the moment. His scent still lingered in my mouth as if I had already tasted him.

No, I couldn't do this. So close. So close. So close.

My adoptive mother, Esme, her face shined in my line of vision when I closed my eyes, determinedly moving my head back to the front. She was so kind, ever so loving. I had always tried to be independent even while staying under Carlisle's fair tutelage. Now, I never craved comfort more than I did right now. The love of my mother gently numbing away the grating desire to kill.

I hadn't killed for so long. For over eighty years, my record was slowly but surely cleansing.

And in the span of one second, one Biology hour...I could_ see_ my nearly forgotten past come crashing down on me. Wrought with all the horrors I had invested time in creating, all the blood I had spilled...

When Rosalie had been changed shortly after me, she had gone wild with her anguish at what she had become. She wanted revenge first, for what had happened to her. The prospect of losing her human life did have all the drawbacks Rosalie cared for, however. Like babies and growing old with the one she loved.

I **never** had those setbacks because I did not care for any of those type of misgivings. In my human life, all that mattered to me was taking care of my family. I had to do that since the day I could walk. They contracted the Spanish Influenza before I did.

My mother begged Carlisle to save my life before she died. And so he did. In such blind fury for not being able to save my own family, the family I had come to take care of for all my life, I left Carlisle and Esme. In 1928, I had my rebellion period where I targeted the worst scum of society to appease my thirst for human blood.

Eventually, shame overcame me. Eternity was a long time to think cruelty was just...and it became quite apparent that my methods was not so just. I returned to Carlisle's way of life.

This way of life.

And this boy...This stupid boy, was wrecking havoc on my very existence.

Carlisle would probably forgive me. He thought me better than this, even if I did kill Chief Swan's only son. We'd run away, start over...

And I'd be left wishing I'd have been ripped apart.

When the bell rang, Edward's life was saved. I rushed out of the classroom in a blur, not daring to breathe still. I didn't want to see that boy. I didn't want to see that boy ever again if I could help it. I found my feet automatically taking me to the ladies room where I passed Jessica Stanley. She looked appalled when she saw me.

_Isabella Cullen...What's wrong with her face? She looks like she's about to have hysterics._

Did I? I waited for her to leave with her thoughts before I gripped both edges of a porcelain sink and took in my expression.

She was right.

I looked like I might spontaneously combust at any moment. I was breathing in an out too-fast pace, taking in the clean, bleached air in blatant desperation. My eyes were still bruised and puffy from lack of feeding. Of all the days. Of all the days, seriously. Dry sobs racked my body and I saw my face crack. No tears ran, but how I wished they could. Anything from seeing the murderous parasite in the mirror who had so nearly killed a human life or several a few moments before. I couldn't do this again. There was no way in hell...My control was wavering on the edge of a blade, very nearly teetering off. I could not see this boy, ever again. The mystery of his lack of thoughts was all but gone now. The scent of his blood was still a memory that had been burned into my brain for all eternity. It burst my throat into flames just thinking about it.

I cupped my throat then, still crying. It occurred to me, though...that if I did not want to see him. I could simply change classes. Yes. I could test out! Of course! I rushed out of the bathroom to the front office where the elder secretary was behind the large counter printing something out.

When she saw me, she smiled.

_Isabella Cullen? Doesn't she have Spanish this period?_

Trust a small school like this to have the secretary know everyone's schedule personally.

"Can I help you with something, Miss Cullen? Don't you have class this period?" She asked.

"I need some help changing my schedule," I rearranged my features so my eyes were smoldering into hers. Mrs. Cope may not have been interested in women, but that wasn't a problem. I was a sweet, innocent, straight-A student and Cope liked that.

"Of course, Isabella," Mrs. Cope replied, conceding to my intent. "How can I help?"

"I was wondering if I could drop biology," I stated.

" Is there something wrong with Mister Banner?" She inquired.

"No, I'd just like to test out. I know the material already,"

_Of course you do._"Actually, Isabella, it's the middle of the year and I'm afraid the date to sign up for test-outs has passed already," Mrs. Cope told me sadly.

The door opened behind me and with it a fresh wave of air. The person who entered had unusually silent thoughts. I kept focusing on Mrs. Cope, anxious to make this work.

"Then can I just drop Biology?" I asked, reverting back to my initial request. " I could use the period for study hall."

"Drop the class?" She repeated, looking shocked I'd even suggest it. "You won't have enough credits..."

"I can always take zero hour. You know the hour before school starts? Or maybe an seventh period class after hours?" I asked.

"You should talk to your parents about that, Isabella,"

I inhaled some fresh air to speak with.

Big mistake. The silently thinking stranger was Edward. He was here for God knows what. I peered over my shoulder, straight at him.

He wore a puzzled frown that clearly told me he hadn't forgotten too soon my glower in Biology. He raised an eyebrow and those bright green eyes widened. I wondered what expression I wore.

His smell was back like a demon from hell back to laugh in my face, saturating my veins as if I had already tasted him. I almost moaned from the dizzying scent that would plague me in my dreams if I could dream at all. So sweet...The vicinity was so much smaller than the bulky classroom and aside from Mrs. Cope, there was only a few witnesses here that I'd have to kill as opposed to the twenty before.

Oh, it would have been so easy, right then...

And so wrong. I opened my eyes, not realizing I was lost in a second of my own visionary slaughter of Edward.

Focusing back on Mrs. Cope, I all but growled at her. "Never mind. I can see that it's impossible. I'll just have to endure."

I spun around and very nearly slammed into Edward's shoulder on my way out. I careened past people in the hall easily as I made for the exit. The parking lot was empty because the bell had only rung exactly two minutes ago. I slipped inside of my silver Volvo waiting for the other four to come. Alice came first, her arm linked with Jasper's. I couldn't discern her expression yet I was surprised she hadn't come running to find me. How many different futures had she seen in the last two hours? Or was she even looking in my future? How very perfect.

Rosalie and Emmett had climbed in too, Rosalie on the passenger side of me.

"Bella?" Emmett asked when I reversed out of the parking lot. He could see I wasn't my normal, broody self. There was tension coming off me in waves and you didn't need to be Jasper Hale to figure that out.

_She looks angry,_ Rosalie was thinking.

_Most interesting, _Jasper got the full front of the deal and he could tell the tenor of my emotions were ranging from insane to completely out of control. He was wondering how exactly I was still able to drive without trying to flip the car.

Maybe I was.

"What's your deal, woman? You look like you caved and had a buffet," Rosalie teased. I cast her a dark look before spinning the car past Tyler Crowley's stupid blue van and getting on the main road where I pushed past fifty. I could tell I definitely didn't look like I caved into anything. I glanced into the mirror and could see my complexion was still much worse than any of the other four.

"Shut up," I muttered, easily avoiding incoming cars.

"Bella," Alice said from the back.

"What?"

"You don't have to go," She said, puzzling me. But nothing could bring me out of the delusional stupor. The mere ghost of Edward's scent was lingering, like a strong perfume that had been sprayed on me. No amount of washing, whether in rain or soap was going to get rid of it.

"Go where," I retorted.

"Anywhere," She said, and for a second I considered delving further into her mind to figure what exactly she meant. But I didn't have to. A vision of me, still considerably underfed, in the snowy mountains of Northern Canada came to mind. I don't know what I was doing there. Getting away, perhaps? Sounded like a good idea.

I sighed in response.

Once we reached the house, Carlisle was waiting at the door, presumably to greet us all. I wondered if he had off today. Perfect for me. I scrambled out of my seat belt first to meet him.

"Bella," He said when I entered, then he eyed my expression and his medical concern came in fast. He took my face between his hands. "Your turning green, Bella. Why haven't you fed?"

"Because she's an idiot," Rosalie explained as she was passing by.

"Carlisle, she very nearly killed a human today. I saw it," said Alice when she had stepped inside, throwing off her white jacket. So Alice did see something. And she didn't come to me...That was comforting.

I shrugged off Carlisle's hold, unable to face him.

"You should go out and hunt with me. Right now. I'll take Esme along with us. We'll-"

"I can't," I stated, overriding him. My throat, my head and my every inch wanted some sustenance that he was offering. It was draining my willpower to deny my father this. I sunk into the piano chair. " I have to go for a while."

"Go...Go where?" Carlisle asked while Rosalie and Emmett disinterestingly went into the kitchen to greet Esme, who was watching a cooking show. Jasper stayed near me, hoping to control the atmosphere with his ability. I was very quick to dispel this by determinedly holding onto my current state.

_What are you so afraid of? I've never seen you so..._

"Weak?" I chuckled darkly.

"I wasn't going to say that," Carlisle amended. "Conflicted, Bella. What's wrong?"

My eyes flickered to his concerned expression then away. He only cared and wanted what was best for me, but I couldn't look him in the face while telling him what I felt today. Thank God our abilities weren't reversed. But what I would give just to have his compassion right now. If I had his compassion, the idea of killing Edward would have barely grazed my mind.

But I didn't want him to see this.

_Bella?_

"You have_ no_ idea how hard this is for me," I finally stated in answer. I stood up. "Tell Esme for me, will you?"

I didn't want to think about my adopted Mother's pain at seeing me leave.

He stared at me for a long moment and I tried to keep the agony from my face. Slowly, he nodded in understanding. "All right. Don't be too long, Bella. But please come back home to us soon."

No promises there. And I didn't make one. I just nodded in return before exhaling deeply and re-entering the rain.


	2. Open Book

It was freezing cold. Which was a given.

Northern Canada, just as Alice had predicted. The snow here hadn't abated one single bit with my visit. I was in the middle of a blizzard, feeling flecks of snow hit my face and stay where they landed. If I had been human, I'd have cubed up by now. But I wasn't and the snow only seemed to decrease my low temperature even more. I wasn't walking around aimlessly. It was a mountain and I was here because I was meant to meet someone. I could sniff them out from miles away. Occasionally, I could see a hand or a misshaped boot sticking out of the snow, which was that someone's handiwork.

"Bella," said a low, musical voice behind me which made me stop. I turned slowly on the spot to find that someone I was looking for. It was a blond vampire with shoulder length hair and a very tall physique. He was dressed odd, but I supposed to blend in. Black slacks, a white polo and a red and white plaid jacket. The cold here must have been something he was used too.

"Amycus," I regarded him with a nod, turning around to face him. He was only a few feet away. In a blur beyond my line of sight. My senses were still larger than a human's but weakened to fit the norm. He lumbered over to me, holding something over his shoulder. It took me a minute to register that it was a whole human arm.

"You look gorgeous, Bella. As always," He said, eying my black dress and jacket that I had been wearing for the last two weeks. That's exactly how long it had been since I left Forks. "Hungry, though."

I closed my eyes slowly and a small smile crept upon my face. But, I said nothing. He simply stood there and watched me for a long moment, his dark red eyes rimmed with gold. I hoped he was enjoying his little mental fantasy, because I certainly wasn't.

"Come on, darling," He dropped the limb and was in front of me in a flash. He gathered me up in his arms.

"No," I shoved weakly at his chest and he chuckled.

_You don't like it when someone's stronger than you, do you, Bella? Or is it the proximity? _

"No," I moaned, my head rocking back and forth against his shoulder. "Just don't like being touched by you."

He laughed again. _I'll take that as a compliment. Brace yourself. We're about to violate the speeding laws._

I watched the snow and debris swish past us in tiny little blurs of black and mostly white. It was something I was used to. I could feel Amycus moving soundlessly below, but if I listened hard enough, I could hear the soft pitter patter of his boots. I was so much faster than him. He sucked at violating the speeding law.

Within seconds we were at a small cabin that I had seen before but not in nearly eighty years. Amycus stealthily lowered me a few inches to grip the door handle and pull us both in. He used his speed to deposit me in a seat at the dinner table. I slumped forward onto the surface of the table and wrapped my arms around my head. I could hear Amycus bustling around, firing up lamps to illuminate the place.

I heard the scraping of wood against wood and knew he had taken a seat opposite of me. I didn't look up to acknowledge this.

"So my sweet Bella, to what do I owe this pleasure?" He asked. _So unusual for my favorite female vampire to show up on this fine Monday afternoon. And here I was thinking Carlisle's particular diet had changed her._

"It has changed me," I said, sitting up and looking at him with blurry eyes.

Amycus was one of the vampires I had encountered during my time away from Carlisle. He had tried several times to mate with me, much to my dismay, but he enjoyed tracking me, watching me. At first I thought it possible to simply kill him before his obsession got out of hand. But he never meant me any harm in the end. After all, we were immortals. And you could not mate with another vampire without the consent of both parties. He was content with waiting for me to wise up, but I never did. It was very hurtful when he saw my gradual change back into sense. I hadn't visited him but a couple of times since. None of those times were to gloat, but to see an old friend.

His methods of surviving off blood hadn't changed. He hunted humans, passing hunters or even going to town when open season was over. And he stored his blood inside his freezer to keep him sustained.

"I had heard rumors about Carlisle's methods with animals...I tried it...Damned waste of time if you ask me," He murmured, watching me closely. "But if you enjoy it..."

"I don't enjoy it. Its quite disgusting, but its sustenance and up until two weeks ago, I really didn't mind it," I blurted before I could stop myself.

_So, you've finally come back to me.._

I smiled sardonically. "Not exactly."

This did not deter him in the slightest. Or so it would seem.

_What made you run so? Your particular shade of green is a blight contrast to the snow outside, Bella._

"I had...some complication with a human in my grade level," I admitted, shaking my head and sighing softly as I thought of the young Edward and his bewildered expression. My last encounter with him. "It got...rather dangerous, so I left."

_You never seemed the type to have trouble with men._

"You are so off the mark. It's not exactly what you're thinking of," I remarked, my face flushing with chagrin. I probably looked terrible, but I didn't really care.

"So your plan is to waste away here?" He laughed and faked an English accent. "That's bloody depressing. I won't have it. Not in my house."

"I don't know what I'm doing here," I answered, running my fingers through my long brown hair that trailed down my back. " I think I'm here to get away for a little while."

"Well, I think you've been away for far too long," He chuckled at my puzzled expression when I bolted up. "Carlisle called me. He figured you'd come here. I'm going to have to call him back and let him know you haven't withered away somewhere in the mountains. I was surprised it took so long for me to find you. You were usually so easy to track."

_Then again, I wasn't following you as much as I was following the trail of blood you left behind. _Amycus made me shift uncomfortably as he went down this train of thought. I got a glimpse of myself at my darkest hours. In my currently self-loathing state, this did not help.

"Are you going back to Carlisle?" Amycus asked, finally cutting me out of his enjoyment of memories I was better off forgetting.

"I don't honestly know," I thought of Edward. The memory of his overwhelming scent came like a battering ram and I cringed in my chair. I wished I could think that it was just because I was especially thirsty that day that his blood sang to me so much. But I had been around hundreds of humans that day. Edward Swan wasn't even bleeding anywhere and I had wanted him so badly.

I felt hands on my shoulders and looked up to find Amycus leaning down on me, examining my face with a look that reminded me of Carlisle. "If you weren't immortal, Bella, you'd be as thin as a stick right now. Before you go anywhere...or whether you stay here. You're going to feed."

He left me at once and was suddenly in his kitchen, pulling something out of the fridge. It was a used coke bottle that had been emptied of soda and replaced with thick red liquid. Amycus must have thought it funny to leave the label on it.

"I'm not drinking human blood," I said defiantly.

"Relax, kitten. Carlisle would be proud of me. This is doe blood. You'll like it. I hear they're about as vibrant as an obese truck driver," He brought it out to me and put it on the table. "Drink up. All of it. You'll feel good as new."

"I doubt that," But I took the bottle anyway and downed it all in one single gulp. The blood saturated my veins instantly, lending me strength and filling my senses with blazing hot fire despite the fact that the blood tasted lukewarm. My eyes were closed, but I knew they were steady turning maroon behind my lids. Only my throat and gulps were sounds while Amycus watched me.

_God, you look sexy._

"Mmm?" I murmured, looking up. I could see Amycus all too clearly now.

"Loads better. You look pretty again," Amycus commented, taking in my appearance with a appreciating stare.

I raised my eyebrows and made the best Rosalie-esque expression I could muster. "I'm divine twenty-four, seven, thank you."

He smiled. "Whatever trouble you're in, Bella. You can handle it. I've seen you drain the worst scum of the universe...Whatever's making you so afraid...Just let it go. Nothing's scary about the darkness if you just face it like a man. Or in your case, a really sexy vampire."

"Hmm," I said, taking the last swig of the bottle, and licking my lips in satisfaction for the salty taste of the last remnants of blood. "I don't know about that. This is..."

_Hard? What in life isn't hard? It's a test, Bella. You've aced the ones we went through, and I'm still failing mine._

I eyed his expression for a long moment. He was sincere in this thought, because he looked at me without the slightest trace of amusement.

"I don't know if I have control for this," I whispered.

"You're the type to face things head on, not abandon them. Do not disappoint me now," Amycus stated, removing my bottle and placing it inside the sink where he cleansed it. From the sink, he continued. "You're stronger than you give yourself credit for. You embrace danger, not run from it. And really, Bella. Running to me? Come on. If someone is in danger back with Carlisle, you really think coming back to me of all the undead was wise? I'd just make you embrace this life again."

I thought about that in my head. I tried to be the Bella in his head that embraced danger, that laughed in the face of a difficult problem. I used to be that way. I used to be so confident in everything I could do. I was confident that day I could handle school for the rest of the day until that dreadful hour in Biology. Now, I wasn't so sure. It was pleasant to think of myself in the way that Amycus thought of me.

I was up in a flash of color, right before him. I took his face between my hands and kissed his cheek, pulling back swiftly when he twisted his lips towards mine.

"Thanks, Amycus. I needed that," I said, releasing his face and stepping back.

"Of course, Bella. I just wish you'd think these things through before acting too rashly. Your wild side is my favorite side, but it doesn't suit you in this case," He commented. He took a black baseball cap from the empty seat that was next to mine and put it on his head. "Meanwhile I've got an actual dinner to go out and retrieve. If I'm not here to see you leave, Bella...Then, take care."

He gave me a wink before exiting. I had a feeling my rejection was hurting more than he let on. Oh well, there wasn't much to do about that. I started eying his little cabin with an absent mind. Suddenly, I was anxious to be on my way. Edward Swan's bright green eyes came to mind and I couldn't guess what he was thinking. Curious, nervous, yet slightly guarded at the same time. I was the most dangerous being in the world to Edward Swan...And when I thought of those eyes, they were asking the silent question. What did it mean for his life if I went back to Forks? I didn't know how to answer that and if someone were to ask, I wouldn't know how to answer that either. Even if it were Edward...

I wrapped my jacket more around myself and walked out into the cold. I could make it back to Forks within two hours with my speed. Now that I was better fed, maybe an hour and a half. I was surprised to find that I actually did want to see my family and that was part of the reason I was going back, other than facing my fear and deadly curiosity of Edward Swan.

I broke into a race over the fresh blanket of snow, leaving only scattered footprints.

* * *

><p>Coach Clapp had just finished explaining the physics of basketball when the bell rung for class's end. I was surprised. Two weeks ago we were having a similar lesson to this regarding volleyball. I had missed volleyball. What a shame. The balding older man had given me a warm welcome back, giving a crinkly-eyed look of sympathy when I informed him I was sick. Not to mention the snow from atop Northern Canada seemed to stretch its influence to this dismal town. The children were ecstatic about it. It was a good excuse to run into that the wretched snow had given me an illness.<p>

_She certainly did look sick two weeks ago._

Perceptive. The teachers caught on more than I gave them credit for. As I came out of the changing lockers in my regular clothes(a tight black t-shirt with a black and white plaid jacket and tight blue jeans), Rosalie caught up with me.

"Don't even think about it today. I was getting used those two weeks without you, so don't screw this up," She fired off.

"Oh, go to Hell, Rosalie," I mumbled.

Rosalie laughed, unchecked by this. "You always have to be the center of attention, Bella. For once, I don't think you should have the spotlight."

"For once, I think you should try filling your head with more than just air," I replied as we headed towards the cafeteria together for lunch.

"Alice thinks you'll be just fine," said Rosalie, ignoring my insult. "She said your future is safe."

"Does yours involve you falling down a spiraling staircase?" I asked innocently. "I'll cross my fingers."

"Keep it up, Bella. I heard brooding makes blood wear off faster," She said, speeding up ahead of me and entering through the double doors. I spotted my family in line already and made a beeline for them, as usual, we were one of the first ones in line. So far, so good. So far, so normal.

"I think we're going to be okay, today," Alice was saying. It took me a full minute to register just how stiff everyone's stance was. Emmett was hovering protectively between Rosalie and Alice. Jasper was controlling the mood to ensure intensity and strengthen everyone's resolve. Even Rosalie had tensed, but she was more annoyed.

Wow.

"All this? For me? Aww, you shouldn't have!" I sang sarcastically, attracting a few stares by incoming students.

Alice ignored. So did the rest. "If we sit in our usual spot, he won't be so downwind."

"Well, we're not changing spots, Alice. Don't worry about it," Emmett said, his eyes on me.

"Everything's going to be fine. Will all of you just chill out?" I requested when they all looked my way. "I'm much better fed."

"Yes," Alice agreed. I saw in her head a peaceful biology room map from above with students. Before I could pick out which one was supposed to be me, she skipped off to pick out of her tray of wasteful human sustenance with her husband and Emmett following.

This was where I was at my most tense. When I sat down in my usual spot on the table, I crossed my arms and leaned back away from my tray. It might have looked casual, but this was so no one looked my way while I cast my focus elsewhere. I stretched out and probed the mind of every being in the cafeteria, listening for the slightest thought directed our way.

Carlisle had told me to do this. If there was a suspicion, we would all leave. Such was the rule. I was sure Edward Swan had made a few new friends enough to confide in the weird Cullen girl's black glare of him two weeks ago.

I was sure, now that I was back, I was going to get unusual stares from the boys and girls. Maybe Jessica Stanley could contribute her sight of me after Biology had ended.

There was nothing but the usual babble. Several thoughts were still focused upon Edward except now the thoughts circled around Jessica Stanley too. No wonder there wasn't anything from her either. Young love. Everyone was circulating Edward's date with her this coming Friday and how it was a good sign to go on a second date.

_Anything?_ Emmett asked.

"No," I said, pulling out of my scope to focus upon them and leaning back into the table with a frown.

They all turned to stare at me.

"I guess you're not as scary as you think," Emmett remarked out loud with a chortle.

How strange. He must have thought I was just a strange person and that probably wasn't anything new to the minds of the student body. I was sure he heard me trying to get out of the class with him too. I could see his bewildered expression in my mind of that day.

"He's about to come in," Alice spoke out loud, her vision taking a new direction that looked so close to reality, I almost thought it was the present. Edward walking in with Jessica Stanley wrapping her arm around the arm of his navy blue jacket. She must have liked how wild his hair went because it looked particularly unkempt today, sprinkled with melted snow that looked like diamonds.

"Look human," Alice hissed to the four of us.

"Look broody," I amended. "That's us during normal time."

"Copy Bella," said Rosalie scathingly.

"Punch Rose in the face," I retorted. "Or let me do it."

_Bella._ Came the playfully threatening tenor of Emmett's thoughts.

I reached over and pinched Rose in the shoulder with my two fingernails. She looked at me shocked before she slapped my hand away and kicked me underneath the chair. Just like two weeks ago, I cringed at the pain in my knee.

_You suck_. She thought.

"Your mom sucks," I snapped back.

_Considering we share the same mother, I think Esme will hear about that, _Jasper's thoughts overrode Rosalie's tinkling laughter.

"We all suck. Get it? I made a funny," I responded lamely. I picked an apple off my tray and threw it at Emmett who effortlessly raised his right arm and caught it cleanly in his palm. He winked at me and took a bite from it.

"What's wrong, Ed? Aren't you hungry, man?" Mike Newton was asking and I went rigid.

"Nothing," was Edward's response in a clear voice. It stood out, but only because I was listening for it. "I'll just get a soda today."

"You all right?" Mike asked. _He looks a little pale actually. Maybe it's all the dates with Jessica. She told Lauren she went out with him every day of last week. Sounds like bull. She looks happy though._

I looked into his mind, though I was only looking for Edward. Did he look sick? He did look paler, and by what I could see, his expression was borderline irritated. I wandered if it was for Jessica who was now picking out all his meal items without consideration for what he wanted. I wanted to laugh. But maybe I was wrong and she just knew what he wanted. She certainly did look happy, but the word I would have thought was smug.

"Actually, I feel a little sick," Edward commented to both of them. Jessica immediately changed the direction of her thoughts to questioning aloud whether he ate breakfast, whether his stomach hurt or not. She loved her new boy toy, that was obvious.

He sat down at his usual table with the popular Junior boys and girls just like two weeks ago. I sighed happily and leaned back in my chair with my own smug smile directed at Rosalie.

"Aren't you happy? We're not moving. Yay," I murmured just low enough for my siblings.

_I don't know about you, but I'm happy. _Alice thought.

Just then Jasper threw a small handful of ice straight at Emmett's unsuspecting face. He looked startled for a moment before he gave a wide grin and stood up.

"Oh, that is it!" He hissed, wriggling his body like a giant grizzly shaking off ice. It flew everywhere, namely at Jasper. He laughed and raised his hands to ward it off while the two girls raised their backpacks and trays to shield from the onslaught. I was furthest away, so I got the least damage. All I did was lean back to find the little flecks of snow landing on my thighs.

_He's looking at the Cullens...Better hope Jessica keeps talking to Lauren while he does that_. Mike Newton thought. I closed the distance back to my table and slid my gaze past Mike Newton to the one looking our way. Edward didn't look away immediately. His eyebrows were shot up and I saw a clear view of his face. Finally, he looked down at his tray and began eating fries one by one.

This boy...Why was it so hard to decipher his thoughts? He still had faint annoyance in his face. It wasn't like that when he met my gaze. But now it was back. I was sure it was for Jessica, or for Mike. Naturally, he should have been thinking about that. I couldn't catch that, however. Maybe he had suffered brain damage as a child or recently which had rocked his thoughts into haywire. That didn't seem likely. That came with the insane or the demented, and even those individuals had thoughts. Broken, incoherent...but thoughts nonetheless.

This one had nothing.

I could see Mike Newton glancing at our table, at me, specifically.

"Isabella Cullen is staring at you," He whispered to Edward.

I waited with baited breath for Edward's response.

"Does she look pissed off?" He asked in too low of a voice for me to determine whether it was anxious or not. Mike Newton assessed my expression in his mind. I was still staring only at Edward, trying to break whatever glass was shrouding his mind.

"No," said Mike. My intense glare was something he liked. His thoughts had given off a envious edge now. _She's got such pretty eyes. I wish she looked at me like that._ He kept his jealousy out of his voice. "Should she be?"

Edward gave a dry chuckle without humor. "I don't think she likes me very much."

So, he _had_ noticed two weeks ago of our lovely silent escapades. I was surprised Mike Newton didn't know of this already. Half of me wished Edward _did_ tell Mike so that the latter boy would stop with those obsessive fantasies. I could see Edward look even more irritated than before, a crease forming between his eyebrows as he determinedly stared at the edge of his table. He must have wondered why I didn't seem to like him that much, but as it was, I couldn't tell if that was his immediate thought.

"The Cullens don't like anybody," Mike assured him in a low voice. _At least not usually._ "Well...They don't usually notice anybody enough to like them..But she's still staring at you."

"Stop looking at her, all right?" Edward snapped in his irritated tone. I smiled a bit when I turned my head back to my family. Edward didn't look our way for the rest of the lunch hour.

Jessica Stanley was still showing him off and relaying to Angela Weber and Lauren Mallory how Edward had liked her dress on the date they had went on Sunday night. Of course they couldn't stay out cause it was a school night. Because it was magical. Simply magical.

When the lunch hour ended, I stayed in my seat with my arms crossed, looking determinedly away from the eyes of my family. I knew they hadn't moved either. They were wondering what I was going to do. Whether it would be or all or nothing. That's what it was two weeks ago too, except now they were prepared for it and Alice was going to be keeping a sharp eye on me and my future no matter what.

Go to class and potentially kill an innocent young boy or run_ again_?

"Do you want to know my opinion?" Alice asked.

I narrowed my eyes. "Not exactly."

"I think you'll make it through the hour, Bella," said Alice. I looked back at her with pain on my face and she softened.

I had been so erratic two weeks ago. I don't think anything changed between then and now except that I was better fed. What difference did that make? He still had the luscious blood that I could imagine gushing from my mouth as I licked my lips, not wanting to waste a drop. My mind changed from one thing to another so quickly then. I wanted him dead one moment, and the next I was falling to pieces in the bathroom. I had made it out of there without killing anyone, but just barely.

"Why push yourself, Bella?" Jasper asked. He was a little gloating because he wasn't the only one having trouble adjusting. "Go home. Take it slow."

"I don't wanna move just because Bella's cracking," Rosalie whined, leaning into Emmett who wrapped his arm around her shoulder. She glared at me like I was a criminal. "We're about to graduate and we have to start over again? I don't want to."

She sounded like a spoiled child and I stared at her, offended. I had been in this lifestyle much longer than her. I had a bad patch. So did _she._ But I had one bad spill in this decade and suddenly I was the shame of the family? I could see Alice watching me with an interested expression.

"You just helped out a bunch, Rose. She's all determined to prove you wrong now," said Alice brightly. "You're clear, Bella. Go on to class."

It was the curiosity, really, that had me wanting to go to class. Edward Swan's mind was very closed off, but his eyes were open, so perhaps I'd figure things out there. I shouldn't have been this curious for him. It was dangerous for us to get to know anybody with a pulse and heartbeat, but I found I really wanted to know what he was thinking deep in that silent mind of his. This had never happened before, and it made the otherwise dull day, interesting.

We all parted somewhat awkwardly. Rose gave me a meaningful look that clearly said "I'll kill you if you screw this up for us." And Alice nodded encouragingly. Emmett and Jasper gave me an amused look before heading through the other exits with Rosalie. Alice followed me and like before, she stopped me in the hall way.

That reminded me. "You knew...Two weeks ago."

"I knew you were thirsty and otherwise incapable of rational thought. I was...surprised...When you made it through," Alice admitted. She clapped me on the shoulder once before turning away while I walked a slow funeral march into Biology.

I was not late. Mister Banner was still setting up today's lab on Mitosis. We were still on that particular chapter. Haha. He smiled at me when I passed.

"Welcome back, Isabella," He said as I passed him.

"Thank you," I answered politely. Edward was already sitting at our table with Mike leaning on it. Behind our table, Jessica was leaning forward on her desk, listening in on Mike and Edward's conversation and inputting when necessary or unnecessary. I passed them by, kind of glad when I only passed Mike and inhaled his very normal scent. I knew Edward had noticed my approach when he blinked his eyes three times in rather fast succession as I took my seat beside him.

Edward abruptly turned away from his two companions. I wasn't tuned in to this conversation only because it was basically Jessica and Mike teasing one another about the date on Friday and how Mike didn't have one. If he did, they could double date.

Mike lingered for a moment to whisper to Edward as Jessica was preoccupied with unloading her backpack. "Dude...Do you think I should really find a date for Friday with you guys?"

"If you want to," said Edward patiently. His voice stuck out because I had been waiting for him to speak. He had a soothing, calm voice free of any hint of accent or origin. It was so unlike Mike who had the loudest thoughts in the world, and unlike my brothers' voices too. Edward sounded like he could tame a lion with that voice.

"I don't know who to ask...," said Mike, forlorn.

Before Edward could answer, Tyler Crowley called Mike from the back. "Hey Mike! C'mere real quick!"

That left the two of us. Edward was back to facing the front, his body as stiff as mine was as he extended his elbows on the desk and entwined his fingers together.

I had to talk to him. Make him walk out with a different impression than the one he had before.

"Hello," I said in a quiet voice. The same one I had used for Mrs. Cope when I was trying to get something done my way. I smiled politely.

He looked my way, startled like a rabbit with its ears up. His eyes locked with mine and I could see they were full of burning curiosity. I stared back for a long moment, searching. He was just a boy, and so I could see I had no reason to detest him as much as I had before. His face lost some color and he looked back down at his hands, saying nothing.

I was faced with his cheek now, and I continued to look at that, trying very hard to ignore that the veins in his neck were standing out particularly turquoise against his pallid skin.

"My name is Isabella Cullen," I said, even though he was well aware of that. "I didn't get a chance to introduce myself before. You must be Edward Swan."

He looked at me again with that same confused expression, wetting his lips so he could speak. It was lucky I hadn't inhaled right then when he exhaled. "Yeah...Yeah, that's me. How'd you know that?"

I smiled, careful not to show my teeth. "I think everyone knows your name, Edward. The chief's son, all that."

A muscle twitched in his jaw which I guessed was more annoyance. This one didn't like the attention he had been getting, I assumed.

"Yeah, I guess," He muttered more to himself, embarrassed. He stared at me for a long moment. "I guess my Dad's been busy telling everyone about me moving back here. I hope he hasn't been too open about the details."

That was interesting. What details did he have to hide? "Nothing too bad, I can assure you." I adjusted my voice to sound as though I was listing off something in boredom. "You're his pride and joy. He loves you so much and you dress up like Superman for fun at night."

His eyes widened, surprised at my last sentence and I couldn't help but grin when he started laughing with less tension than he probably felt. His shoulders were still stiff.

"My trade secret out in the open. That sucks," Edward said with a small chuckle.

But, at the moment. I had bigger problems. If I was going to speak to him anymore, I would have to inhale. My oxygen had burnt out. It was lucky for me that Mister Banner had commanded the class's attention and was explaining the beginning parts of the lab.

It would be incredibly harsh if I didn't speak to him during the entire time of this lab work. We were lab _partners _after all.. It would be strange enough that he would definitely go blabbing this time to the entire school.

I leaned as far away from him as I could without actually moving my stool, whipping my head towards the window on my other side. I wished it was open, but with my luck, the breeze would waft Edward's scent more toward me then away. I closed my eyes with my shoulders hunched as I sucked in one quick breath of air.

It was definitely grinding. Even without being able to smell him this time, I could almost taste the delicious scent I had been parted from for two whole weeks back on the menu. My throat was on fire again, with a desire every bit as overpowering as it had been two weeks ago.

I glared at the black of the desk, feeling the crimson dilute from my eyes as I struggled with all my might to compose myself.

Edward was looking at me, noticing nothing, or pretending not to when I looked back at him.

"Ladies first, partner?" He offered.

His face fell slightly and I wondered what he saw. "Or I could go first if you want..."

"Sure," I said, working with the weight of one hundred years of hard work to sound casual. "I'll go first."

I brought out the microscope from the box Banner had left between us and inserted the first slide. With one quick glance in to the scope, I called it. "Prophase."

"Prophase huh?" He said, sounding skeptical enough that I caught his doubtful expression. My examination must not have been thorough enough in his opinion. He slid the microscope towards himself and glanced through it, his face falling slightly as he eyed the assignment which showed what prophase looked like. It was exactly the same. "Prophase it is."

He took the paper and proceeded to write the word down on the line. I couldn't help but be amused at him doubting me.

I gave a shrug of my shoulders and faced the front while he proceeded to look through the scope again. I was hugging myself. "I can bet you the next one's Anaphase."

He began to scrawl something down with a bit of an amused smile. I peeked over, without inhaling, and gave a small "Aha." when I saw what the word was.

"You wanna actually look through the microscope or guess at the next one too?" Edward asked in that same entertained voice. I gave a noncommittal shrug of my shoulders and pulled the microscope towards me-a stupid gesture-considering he was holding it in the exact same place I had grabbed it. My palm made contact with his. A heat surge like an electrical current traveled all the way up to my elbow. He wrenched his hand back as though I had burned him.

"Sorry," I murmured, glancing into the microscope. "Interphase."

I slid the paper towards me without looking at him and wrote the word down on the third line. I was too unsettled to look at him.

I breathed quietly while his scent did inexplicable things to the thirst burning in my throat. Like a lighter that was switching on and off. He was so quiet that it made the silence all too loaded.

"Metaphase," I heard somewhere to my right. I turned to find him giving me a crooked smile. "You wanna check?"

"No," I licked the roof of my mouth in a quick half-circle and expelled a relieved breath. He was good...I knew he felt that just as surely as I knew he noticed other things. We finished the last slide, Telophase and the lab was over. I knew we were the only ones done, because in the backround, I could hear the internal chatter of wandering minds...

Jessica was all but breathing down my neck with her own brand of venom. She had seen us laughing at the beginning and ever since then, her eyes had become hawk eyes, watching my every move.

I focused on Edward. He was actually rather handsome with his light-colored skin, his big, prominent green eyes, his high cheekbones, his strong jawline and straight nose. His bronze colored hair was untidy and wavy, but it didn't deter his physical appearance at all. He actually had the perfect face and the perfect physique underneath that jacket, I was sure.

He looked at me, then, staring right into my eyes. I narrowed mine again, trying to internally shatter that wall that was preventing my access to his thoughts.

"Are you wearing contact lenses?" He asked abruptly.

"Am I wearing what?" I repeated. Like I needed contact lenses to see better. They'd just be annoying. But I heard him, rather than pretending I didn't. "No, I'm not wearing contact lenses."

"Oh, your eyes look different from the last time I saw you," said Edward observantly.

I inwardly flinched and returned my gaze to the front. There was definitely something different about my eyes now that I had fed. They were back to the brown color they were normally. I didn't think he'd notice the black, nor the red two weeks ago...but it seemed he had. A slip on my part. But I had to prepare myself for meeting him today. I drank much more than doe blood after my meeting with Amycus. I had hunted with both pairs of my siblings each time to be prepared.

"Its too bad about the snow, isn't it?" I said, changing the topic to the weather. How lame. But the silence was getting bad.

"The snow?" He repeated. "Not really."

I raised an eyebrow. "You don't like the cold hmm?"

"Not too much. Not the wet either. Not good conditions,"

"For?"

"Football," He said, grinning. His body was a tough build, and I should have figured he used to play football or still did. It would be impossibly hard in Forks to be on the team without making the sport turn into mud-wrestling with jerseys on. He was no Emmett. But he definitely had some muscle on him.

"Forks must be a hard place to settle down in then," I stated, inhaling and shuddering when his scent hit me and scorched my throat.

"You have no idea," He said in a low voice, not noticing that I sounded a little mean there.

"Why did you come here then?" I knew when I asked, that I sounded undeniably rude and prying.

"It's...a long story,"

I stared at him for a long moment, waiting for him to finish, and he didn't. He was leaving it at that? How about no?

"I'm sure I can keep up," I insisted then glanced at the clock behind Banner's desk. "We have time."

He furrowed his eyebrows and I wished I could hear what he was thinking. Maybe these were one of the details he was trying to hide that he hoped his Father didn't mention. That might have been a joke, but I couldn't help bringing it into consideration.

"My mom got remarried," He told me, his face flushing with chagrin and turning an appetizing color.

That wasn't very complicated, yet he sounded sad when he said it.

"That doesn't sound too bad," I admitted which made him look at me at last. I sounded concerned though, like a friend trying to cheer him up. "When did that happen?"

"Last September," He said sighing which made me hold my breath in reply as his warm breath touched my face.

"You don't like the guy?" I questioned.

"No, he's fine," said Edward.

Wasn't it usual that the kid didn't like the new step-parent?

I placed my chin on my palm while my elbow rested against the wood and raised an eyebrow. "Why didn't you stay with them, then?"

He seemed to be surprised how I had taken in this story, this boring story, probably to him. I was fascinated though. "Phil wanted me to come with him while he played ball. He traveled a lot. He was trying to get me into it too...but I'm not really into baseball."

"Neither am I," I replied. He grinned as though it was not surprising to find a girl not too interested in a sport. I continued. "It's boring and slow. I prefer something more exciting."

"So do I," said Edward.

"So, your Mom sent you here?" I asked, fishing for more as I momentarily turned my face away to inhale where his scent wasn't as strong as it might have been. It was still crippling on my senses, but my mind was stronger than my instinct, if only just.

"No," He answered when I was back in the conversation, surprising me somewhat. "She didn't send me. I came here on my own."

Weird.

"Because this is the football capital of the world," I said sarcastically. I hated not guessing right. I hated not knowing a damn thing about this boy other then the spoken word. I wasn't used to it. "I don't get it."

" I didn't want to play baseball," He stated dully. " I think my Mom wanted to travel with Phil, and I didn't want to hold her back...so I moved back with my Dad."

"But now _you're_," I emphasized the word. "unhappy."

"I'm not unhappy," He said angrily, which made me laugh at the contrast between what he was saying and his tone.

He laughed too, more because the sound of my own was engaging, I was sure. He kept watching me for a long moment.

"I've never met anyone so interested in someone else's life story," He told me in a very edgy voice.

"You're not telling me your life story, Edward," I reminded him with a wiggle of my eyebrows as he huffed. "What,...Am I annoying you?"

"No," His eyes seemed trapped by my smoldering gaze and I found it hard to believe. He looked rather irritated. More so than he had today with Jessica on his arm. "I'm more annoyed at myself. People have always said I'm like an open book with my emotions. My face is easy to read, I guess."

I gawked at him as if he had said something stupid. That's what it'd look like to him. How strange. I had **never** spent so much effort trying to read someone in my life and he was frustrated that I read him too_ easily_.

"Incidentally," I admitted in a guarded voice. "I find you very difficult to read."

He smirked as if this was false. "You must be a very good reader then."

"Usually," I said with a smile that exposed the rows of my perfectly shaped razor sharp teeth.

Banner called the class to attention and I had noticed that he had picked up all the assignments by now. Edward has turned his face away from mine, decidedly wary himself. Maybe I had gotten a message across about danger. I couldn't quite afford to find Edward Swan interesting. It was dangerous for both of us.

He threaded his fingers through his hair just as I had taken a breath. A particularly concentrated wave of his scent wafted in my direction. The pain of the burning dryness in my mouth made my head spin and it was just as bad as that first day. I had slightly more control this time. For the moment. I stopped breathing altogether, gripping down tightly on the stool with my head bowed down so he couldn't see my face behind the curtains of my hair.

"So Isabella," Edward remarked suddenly with the air of a movie star turning on the interviewer. Didn't I scare him? He was so...odd. He didn't take any of the subtle warnings to heart, or perhaps he waved them off. I couldn't tell...He leaned on the desk with his elbows and his head inclined towards me. He exhaled and I had to stop myself from moving for a moment to freeze.

" I have a question for you."

I have many for you, Edward Swan.

"Yes?" I asked with a mental cringe. Here it came. A 'what are you' question.

"How would you like to go on a double date with me on Friday?" Edward inquired, thoroughly catching me off guard. Whatever I was expecting him to ask, it certainly wasn't this. I knew the details of the double date already. It'd be Jessica and himself with Mike and me. He was insinuating it was for us, though, the way he had said it, which was what surprised me.

"Are you asking me out, Edward Swan?" I asked with a laugh, using his last name in the combination as well.

He chuckled and leaned back an inch. "Not exactly. My friend, you know Mike? He likes you. It's just dinner and a movie. He's too chicken to ask himself."

"Sir Edward the Chivalrous, asking for his friend," I stated while he laughed his charming laugh.

"Something like that," said Edward.

I leaned forward too so that our shoulders were very nearly touching and I could feel the heat coming from his body. He felt rather like a living, breathing hot lamp that was exuding radiance in the form of a particularly potent scent. I was close enough that I didn't have to raise my voice higher than a whisper for him to hear me. "I don't think that'd be a good idea, Edward..."

His eyes went curiously blank, mesmerized in my gaze. He leaned closer to me too, whispering back. "Why is that...Isabella?"

"People...," I breathed, sheltering my eyes behind my lids when I had to breathe in his heady scent. What was I doing..? "might...get the wrong idea...about you doing the inviting."

"But..." He began exhaling sharply. The breath that so willingly entered past my lips did it. I almost lost it. His eyes were shielded down, on my lips, but I knew mine were blazing red now with the thirst overpowering my mind at last...

The bell rang.

Saved by the bell was the phrase wasn't it? Just as quickly as I had done the first time, I seized my stuff and twisted around him, shooting for the door much faster than I intended, leaving his puzzled expression behind me.

I didn't dare breathe as I sifted through the crowd of students, ignoring that I could breathe now and possibly be fine.

My eyes were on my feet, though as I glided towards the Spanish class, finding Emmett's shoes right in front of me.

He read my wild expression for a second as I looked up.

_How did it go?_ He wandered.

"Nobody died," I mumbled.

_I saw Alice leaving earlier. I almost thought..._

We walked side by side into the classroom. His thoughts wandered to Alice hurriedly leaving her own classroom with a blank look on her face, staring determinedly forward. I could feel his memory of the urge to follow her and his decision to stay put.

I sank into my assigned seat near the front with him sitting next to me. My face reflected complete and total resignation.

"I didn't know I got that close...I didn't think I was going to...At the end there...,"

_It wasn't that bad. Nobody died, as you said, remember?_

"Not this time," I whispered.

_It'll get easier over time. I think. Look at Jasper._

"Jasper's not doing so well, himself," I pointed out.

_Nobodies dying on him either. So you kill the kid._ He shrugged his massive shoulders. _Sometimes someone smells __too good. I'm actually pretty surprised you made it through today._

"Not helping," I moaned into my hands as they clasped over my face. He started musing over the last time he had caught a scent he couldn't resist. A woman hanging up her laundry.

The sheets she had put up had fanned the scent of her blood right in his direction. From there, the memory took a violent direction and I wanted to tune him out while my throat ripped into flames.

I sprang to my feet.

"Esta Bien, Isabella?" Mrs. Goff asked, startled.

"Me perdona, por favor," I replied, darting for the door.

"Emmett," She said helplessly to my brother. "Compruebe en su hermana, por favor."

"Sure," I heard Emmett say as I exited. He grabbed my elbow and towed me outside to the far side of the building where it was completely deserted.

When I swirled to face him, my back slamming against the brick, he was startled at my expression.

Emmett's cold hands were gentle on my face. "Bella? Bella. Breathe. Breathe deep. Come on. Stay with me, now."

I was trembling, falling to pieces and a deep, thick layer of red was coating my pupils. I was going in and out of it. I did as he said though, breathing in and out, in and out. In and out. Here, I only smelled damp, wet grass and Emmett and it eased out of me. He sounded like Carlisle or a father trying to calm a tantrum-prone child down.

When everything seemed to be normal with me, I eased out of his grip.

"Go back to class. Tell her I'm sick or something. I need to be alone," I requested or blatantly ordered. He turned without a word from me until I was alone. I did get too close today. He was far too close to me...but I was drawn in without even thinking about it...

Drawn in...I was interested by him...How wonderful. I wished it was easy for me just to guess at his mysteriously blank thoughts and then let him go as someone who smelled good. But he was...too interesting to pass up. And the idea of seeing eyelids close forever on those large eyes...well, I didn't want to think about that.

I went back to the Volvo and climbed in, playing one of my CDs containing my piano music. It was arrogant to think that my own music calmed me, but it did...For the most part. I laid back in the front seat and closed my eyes. When the ball rang, I ignored it while internal chatter surrounded me. I couldn't help but hear my sisters' voices. Rosalie was furious at my close call. Good for her. Alice was trying to calm her down.

I caught Jessica Stanley closer and closer, though. Her heartbeat was pounding faster than normal and as I tuned into her mind, I figured why.

_..Have never heard her talk so much in my life. It's always been one word here or one word there. Wasn't she like crying the last time I saw her? Maybe she broke up with her boyfriend so now she has to throw herself all over mine. ...Edward still blushing...I wish she'd go back to wherever it was she went off too the last two weeks._

Jessica Stanley, full of venom. She stopped near my car and knocked on the window when she saw me inside. Her lower lip was twitching in anger. I couldn't help but smile. This should be good.

I rolled down my window and stared up at her with a haughty gleam in my eye. "Can I help you?"

"Hi Isabella," Jessica greeted shortly. "I just wanted you to know that Edward Swan and I are dating."

I could have laughed out loud right there and then at how obvious she was being. "I don't care much for gossip."

"It's not gossip," She snapped, simpering. "We started dating a few days ago...and I'd appreciate it if you..."

I opened the door and her sentence died when I stepped out. I was a head taller than her and to emphasize that I looked down on her more than I should have by closing the distance between us. She stared back into my dark eyes, clinging desperately to her anger rather than fear.

_She thinks she's so much better than everyone else...She's not scary. She's just tall. Tall and..._

"Stayed away from him?" A faint smell touched my senses. It was Edward's scent but so faint that it almost did nothing to me. Almost. I closed my eyes automatically when the scarlet shift came so Jessica wouldn't notice either. I fixed her my boldest smile when I recovered. It'd be amusing to pretend I had no idea what her name was. Trust a spoiled Cullen to forget. "I guess that's up to him, isn't it...Ashley?"

"It's Jessica!" Jessica snarled as she stepped away. I saw Alice and Rosalie halt in the opposite direction. Alice froze and the vision of me seizing Jessica by the throat and snapping her neck caved in my mind. Was that where my thought process was heading?

It sure did sound appealing.

I looked over Jessica's shoulder at Alice, over the hood of the car and winked. The movement was so fast, Jessica didn't catch it. Instead she stared at my amused smile before stomping off, furious.

"No, Jessica!" I shouted after her, making her turn my way along with several of her friends, including the vicious Lauren Mallory. " For the last time-I do NOT have the number to Planned Parenthood! Google it!"

Jessica's face flushed a delicious plum color and behind her, Edward Swan, Mike Newton and Tyler Crowley stared between Jess and me open-mouthed with shock. I climbed back in my car while my siblings all entered shortly after me.

"Real mature, Bella," said Rosalie scornfully, her mind clearly still on what Alice had told her.

"That was great," Emmett commented, laughing while Jasper joined in, chortling.

I was still grinning to myself as I backed out. I met Edward's gaze in my rear-view mirror as I was reversing to find him smiling too.


	3. Phenomenon

The rain after the snow had made the ground all icy and hard. The roads were slippery and dangerous to go on. I was better off walking with the rest of the family, but we didn't decide that. Alice predicted more rain after the chilly morning, so the ice would turn to slush. So she said, anyway. I predicted ice that would only spread. Did anyone listen to me? Of course not.

It was a eerily silent ride to school in the morning. Jasper and Alice were hand holding while Alice stared out of the window, clearly distracted by something. I would have found out for myself, but I wasn't in the mood to tune in, so I tuned out instead. Rosalie and Emmett were oblivious to the rest of us, of course, lost in eachother's gazes.

Wonderful. I was being bitter again. It was hard not to be sometimes when you were around three sets of perfectly matched lovers. Some days it was harder than others. This was one of those days.

The first thing I did when we reached the school was look for Edward. Only Alice stayed by my side as I leaned against the driver door of the Volvo. The rest of my siblings went straight to class, tired of my fixation of the Swan boy. He had not yet arrived, but I could hear the chugging of an old truck in the distance.

While I waited for him with my arms crossed, I reflected over the last night's conversation with Carlisle.

He had told me it was all right if I left again. If it was...that bad. It was that bad, truth be told and I was considering leaving again...Where I was heading? I didn't know, much to Alice's frustration who was tuned in on my future automatically. Her gift strengthened the more she knew a person, and she was getting all kinds of oddities about my future.

My favorite meadow...Me lying there, a haze of black covering someone I had brought there. Perhaps a family member? I could see myself mixed in with strange shadows that I couldn't recognize. Like Alice was getting mostly static from me and it was grating for her.

I didn't know what I was doing anymore. I really didn't...The curiosity for Edward Swan's thoughts was almost as powerful as my thirst for his blood. He seemed normal to the rest of the school, to his new friends.

But I felt like there was something more, beyond the surface. He had a mysterious bubble around him, to me. He was quiet...Polite, and loyal it seemed to Mike whom he had asked the date for. Everything I learned about him in our first conversation was something I couldn't help but commit to memory.

I felt the urge to apologize for my behavior yesterday when I walked out on him without giving an answer. The answer, was probably going to be yes, but as I wasn't sure, this added to Alice's static-y future of me. With this boy, nothing was certain. I had learned that enough by now. It felt dangerous to be out on a date with him...but I wouldn't be Edward's date. I'd be Mike's date. Like that made any difference at all.

Still, Edward would be present...I may have made it through two separate days of Biology with Edward, but I wasn't sure on my self-control around him. I wasn't sure if I would ever be certain on that. Hence why leaving was my best option..As Carlisle had said...If there was anything I could do to prevent the Swan child from getting killed, I should do it even if that meant leaving.

Edward drove his truck slowly into view. Both Alice and I followed his trail slowly into a parking lot. He seemed anxious as any human was this day because of the icy roads. I could feel Alice watching me as I smiled while Edward slowly edged out of his car wearing a thick rain coat and edged slowly to the back of his truck to look at his tires. I wondered why. Ah, there was wishing I knew what he was thinking again. But then, I saw for myself that he was simply checking the sturdiness of the snow chains there.

I would go talk to him. He might need a helpful hand to walk through the snow too. I would be careful to walk slow too, so it'd look like I was having moderate trouble on the slick pavement. I began to turn away from my sister, adjusting my own black leather jacket more securely over over my gray jumper dress and long-sleeved black shirt underneath.

"OH NO!" Alice suddenly drew out a sharp hiss. I turned back to her, alarmed, penetrating her mind and wondering if my decision had provoked something terrible. What she saw, though, had nothing to do with me whatsoever.

Tyler Crowley had chosen to take the turn into the parking lot's entrance at a wild velocity. This choice would send him skidding across puddles of ice into...

The vision came only a few seconds before reality. It was not hard to guess just how out of control Tyler's car would become to him. I could see the boy fruitlessly twisting the steering wheel round in his hands in hopes of stopping himself from creating the impending doom of the boy that had been my focus ten seconds ago.

I didn't watch the end of this vision. I looked at Edward who was in the exact same place he was before, only kneeling to dig one of his snow chains out of a place in the ice puddle. He looked startled at the sound of screeching tires. He looked straight at me, frozen in place before turning to watch his approaching death.

_No! _The words screamed in my head as though they came from the vast emptiness deep within the confines of my brain.

I broke into a run that made me all but invisible, but so no human eyes could follow me. I threw myself between the frozen boy and the moving truck. I had handfuls of his jacket in my hand and I shoved him, moving with too much desperation to be as gentle as I needed to be. In the hundredth of a second between the time that I wrenched him out of the path of certain death and the time that I careened into to the ground with him in my arms, I was vividly aware of him underneath me.

His head cracked underneath the ice and my insides froze over. I couldn't look at him though to see much else until I saw the van swerving only slightly before sliding back towards us.

I let go of Edward swiftly and pushed the van back with just my hands leaving indentions where I pressed, sending the van back. Tyler's thoughts were incoherent with panic, but he had no eyes for what I had done.

In another fantastic blur, I was atop Edward again, my hands locked on the pavement on either side of his neck. I had done too much...The threat of exposure was more eminent than it ever had been before. I was not oblivious to the risk I had taken not just for myself, but for all of us.

But these thoughts took a backseat while I had him in my gaze. I was too anxious that I might have hurt him myself in my pathetic attempt at rescue. I was too frightened to have him this close to me, knowing that if any blood was shed and if I were to inhale...None of this would have mattered at all. I was too aware of the heat coming from his body, through both our jackets, I could feel the heat lamp just like before except times ten.

I bent down to examine his face, my hair falling on one side of us.

His eyes were open and staring in shock.

"Edward?" I said in an urgent voice. "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine...," He said automatically, then he found me and I could tell his vision had cleared. He managed a weak smile. "I like the view..."

I smiled back, but relief flooded me in that moment. I inhaled deep and for once, I very much didn't mind the burn in my throat in response.

Edward struggled to sit up and before I could do anything, he fell back, lightly on the ice.

"Careful. I think you hit your head pretty hard," I commented, so very grateful that the fall didn't render any blood loss and that all I was sensing was his blood backed by fully undamaged flesh.

"Ahhh," He groaned, raising a hand within the entrapment of my arms to touch his head.

I couldn't help but give a relieved giggle that I hoped didn't sound borderline hysterical.

The sound of my laughter seemed to waken him more fully and his eyes widened on my face. "Isabella...How...How did you get over here so fast?"

That sobered me up pretty quick.

My expression turned sour. "I was standing right next to you, Edward."

Edward tried to sit up again and this time I placed a knee on the pavement and pulled back to give him room, so that I was no longer on top of him. I stepped as far as I could away from him when we were standing. He was getting up to his feet a little unsteadily.

He stared down at me, and I stared back, stone-faced. I knew my eye contact was key to winning. It confused him. Good.. I wondered if he should be moving so quickly...He seemed fine, but I couldn't be positive...and I was sure Carlisle would know better than I, of course.

I could hear and see several people, mostly students around us now. All the shocked concern and incoherent babble, at the moment, was for Edward and nothing so far was directing any suspicion at me. Edward was distracted by the noise, as he looked at the van then his own truck, then at the people around us.

"You should stay put for now," I advised Edward with a glance at the people approaching. "Paparazzi can come in later."

He blinked and his eyes focused on my face, wide-eyed. "You were over there..."

He glanced towards the south, but there was a big blue van in his way from that path. He swallowed then looked at me again, puzzled. "You were closer to your car."

"No, I wasn't," I snapped back.

"But I saw you," said Edward quietly, his eyes hard on mine, so hard, I had to step back.

"Edward...," I said with the air of trying to convince a child. "I was standing with you and I pushed you out of the way."

His eyebrows furrowed in anger and his jaw set. "No."

Before I knew what I was doing, I took his wrist gently. Heat flooded through my cold fingers with spasms of electricity shooting up my body. He didn't pull away in alarm as I thought he would from my ice-cold touch, which I hoped he simply passed off to the cold weather itself. My movement did shock him though when I heard his heartbeat skip. His eyes were still burning with obstinacy as he glared down at me.

"Please, Edward," I pleaded. By default, I never begged anyone for anything.

"Why?" He asked, still defensive.

"Trust me," I requested in a whisper.

His gaze did soften somewhat and he swallowed hard. "Will you explain everything to me later?"

A muscle twitched in my throat and I hated that I was agreeing to a lie. "Fine."

"All right," He said and I let him go.

The rescue attempt came—several adults, teachers and of course, the principal. I heard cat-calls at Edward from Mike Newton saying they'd get him out as soon as possible. Jessica's worried cries were the loudest. I almost thought she'd stop her fake cries when she realized I was there, but she must have been truly worried that he was going to die...

Authorities had been called, there were sirens blaring in the distance—I tried to ignore Edward and get my scrambled thoughts in the right order. I scanned through every mind in the lot, the witnesses and the latecomers both, but I could find nothing dangerous. Many were surprised to see me here beside Edward, but all concluded—as there was no other possible conclusion—that they had just not noticed me standing by Edward before the accident.

Edward was the one who didn't want to accept this explanation. He was the one who wanted to question me later about it.

I could hear Rosalie, Emmett and Jasper's venomous thoughts wafting my way and I shuddered visibly. I was so getting it tonight. Edward and I waited while the EMT's tried to pry the van away from us so we were out of our little rectangle of space. I waited impatiently, anxious to be out of this close vicinity with Edward Swan who had too-sharp eyes as it was. When it was all finally cleared up, I saw the familiar grizzled face of one of the EMT's, Derek, bringing out a gurney. He looked surprised to find me, but pleased.

"Hey, Isabella," He greeted easily. "I just saw your Dad like five minutes ago. You all right?"

It was lucky for me that Edward was choosing this moment to run his hand through his hair and wince. "I'm fine. I think Edward hit the ice pretty hard after I pushed him down."

I could feel his glower burning holes in my back, but I didn't turn. The EMT began to usher Edward onto a gurney, strapping on a neck brace, much to his chagrin. I turned away to look at the van with my hand dents in it. While everyone was focused on strapping Edward on and he was ushered with questions about what happened, I distractedly rearranged the shape of the dent in the van.

"Can I come with him? Please, he's my boyfriend!" Jessica was screeching as everyone got into the back of the ambulance with Edward looking rather annoyed at his surroundings. The other EMT wasn't sure about this, but when Derek turned to me, he smiled welcomingly.

"Want a lift?" He asked me. I nodded and climbed in and we were off. Jessica was holding Edward's hand like he was on his death bed while I sat opposite of him with my eyes closed, looking rather bored, I assumed to the rest of the people. It was actually pretty relieving to be away from all those shocked, chattering minds.

There was little anyone was saying. I could tell the EMT's didn't think Edward had a serious head injury. He was speaking quite clearly-sticking to my version of things at least for now.

_I should have been there. Right beside him. I saw him there. Why didn't I go to him? He looks so pale right now._ Jessica was misinterpreting his lack of color as a sign of injury rather than what it really was, a reaction to the negative-degree temperature. Her thoughts annoyed me much more than they should. Of course, the concern was genuine, for the most part.

Her thoughts took a poisonous direction when she rounded on me. _Of course, **perfect** Isabella Cullen was the one to save his life instead of me._

My gaze turned wrathful as I slowly raised my head. Her own thought process froze over and she determinedly kept her attention on Edward for the rest of the ride. As soon as we parked, I was the first out of the ambulance truck, heading for the automatic doors. I had my own priority right now and that was Carlisle.

_Where's she going off to? I knew it. I knew she really didn't care for Edward. She was only pretending. Probably going to find a police officer so she can give her statement and admit she was behind it all along. Guilty conscience, I bet. Sluts like that..._

I ground my teeth together as the doors opened for me. Were human girls really so territorial? Not worth it, I told myself. Jessica Stanley's venomous thoughts could be dealt with at a better time, if ever again.

It was easy to find Carlisle's familiar mind. I could pinpoint it in an empty room where he was signing off on some charts. I opened the door.

"Carlisle," I said to call his attention.

He had caught my scent and knew I was coming, of course. When he looked up, our eyes locked and his face paled even more than before.

_Bella...Did you-_

I could see where his thoughts were going and I shook my head once. "No."

_Sorry for thinking so. I should have known. Your eyes..._

He peered at my very brown eyes for a long moment before sighing deeply.

"He's hurt, Carlisle. I don't know about how seriously...but yeah," I glanced behind me while a nurse passed by. " There was a car accident..."

_Slow down, Bella. How were you involved?_

"Some kid came in the wrong way and slipped on the ice with his van skidding straight toward Edward...It almost crushed him," I felt lame explaining this. I couldn't quite meet his eyes either. I felt like I was admitting to a really wrong sin to my Father. That's what it was. I had committed one of the ultimate taboos.

I had to justify myself, so in a rush, I added. "I couldn't just let it kill him, Carlisle. I had to do something. I am.._.so_ sorry. If you want me to leave the family, I will. I didn't want to put us all at risk."

Carlisle took my shoulders in his hands. "Bella, I'm not blaming you. It was probably difficult...And if we must move, we will move together. I would not subject you to roaming alone."

I bit my tongue. I wouldn't be alone more than likely. There weren't many of us, but if I had to leave, I doubted very seriously my diet would stay on animal blood. Still, I could look at him without as much shame now. So, I stared fixedly at a pattern on the wall behind him where all of Carlisle's degrees were framed

_Does he suspect? _Carlisle asked._  
><em>

"I don't know. Everyone's accepting the story, but him...He's going to want an explanation later and I'm not at liberty to say...After all, he did crack his head on that pavement," I felt terrible saying it, but my expression showed smugness on the outside.

"I'll go check on him. Do you want to come with...?" He asked, turning towards the door.

I nodded and started following him back to the entrance when the Chief pulled up. He was a tall man with a muscular build just like Edward and tousled bronze hair that was a few shades darker than Edward's. He looked frantically around before he zipped off in another direction. I exchanged a glance with Carlisle, and stretched out in that second to probe Charlie Swan's mind.

_..Can't have done. My boy...Who did this?...when I get my hands on them...No...Shouldn't say that...They said he was all right. _

Odd that his speech patterns seemed to be coming out as such, like I was receiving a bad frequency. I sped up after Carlisle until he lead me towards the room where Edward was being kept.

"What happened? Are you okay, son?" Charlie was saying out loud in perfectly clarity. It must have just been his thoughts...I could feel the tenor of them, exuding guilt and sadness, but little more. Perhaps this was a missing piece in why I could not hear Edward.

"I'm fine," Edward replied, for his father alone. This hardly eased the Chief's concern, who turned to Carlisle, demanding an play-by-play of what happened. Edward used the doctor's distraction, thinking Carlisle wouldn't notice, to take off the neck brace.

When I entered, I lingered in the doorway, though I could see a chill spread over the humans. Jessica was beside Edward's gurney, her hand gripping his like she wanted to break it. When she saw me, she stood up like I was someone formal. I ignored her and focused on Edward. He hadn't noticed me and was was looking at Carlisle. I guessed his mental thoughts were projected at how pronounced my resemblance to him was...

Tyler Crowley was in a lot worse shape than Edward was and so Edward had to wait to be x-rayed. Once his results came back it was clear that the boy needed some more medical attention and several stitches for his gashed head.

"Edward, man, I'm so sorry," Tyler was saying as Jessica relaxed when she saw I was coming no closer.

"Don't worry about it. There was ice all over that thing...Anybody could have done it," Edward replied. I sneered from my place in the door way. Anybody indeed.

"How'd you get out of the way so fast?" Tyler asked, appalled.

"Uhh...," Edward hesitated, glancing towards his Father now speaking to one of the nurses. "Well...Isabella was there. She pushed me out of the way."

_Who?_ Came Tyler's confused thought that he voiced aloud as well. "What?"

"Isabella Cullen," Edward enunciated when he didn't get who he meant. "She was standing right next to me."

"Cullen?" Tyler repeated, perplexed. _I didn't even see that girl...I could have sworn she wasn't even...Oh well, I guess it all happened pretty fast. "_Is she all right?"

"Yeah...She's somewhere here...I don't think they made her use one of these," He tapped at the metal of the gurney on one side with a slightly irritated look.

I was going to come through but it was Edward's time for x-rays and the nurse bustled past me. I twisted out of the doorway and began walking in the opposite direction while the nurse wheeled him out of the ER with Jessica following.

I turned back and began walking back in the ER so I could speak to Carlisle alone, when Charlie Swan came out of the room before I could. I stopped short and politely moved aside so he could move past me, but he spoke instead. I could detect no threat of from Charlie's blood. Indeed, he smelled as normal as could be. His thoughts were scattered, perhaps, but his scent...fine. I didn't want to linger on the memory of Edward's blood, however. So soon after saving him from death, and with his extremely concerned Father so close to me.

"Are you Carlisle's daughter, Isabella?" He asked me urgently. He was noting our resemblance. The same pale features, the same brown eyes, even though Carlisle's hair and eyes were lighter than mine.

"I am, sir," I said with respect.

"Oh, thank you so much," Without warning, his arms collapsed around my shoulders and he was pulling me into a tight hug. My eyes widened when my lips were pulled inches away from his neck where I could sense his pulse vibrating underneath his skin and hear his warm, delicious, wet heartbeat against my deadened heart. I could smell his very human, very ordinary scent, though, and it did nothing to me.

Carlisle was still with Tyler, helping wrap gauze around his bleeding forehead. He glanced up at me long enough to see my surprised face. I patted Charlie's back awkwardly.

_...Don't know what I'd have done without him. ...never forgive me. So glad hes okay. So glad, he's safe._

"Thank you,"He said again, his voice dripping with such sincerity that it shocked me. He pulled away and held my shoulders. Thank God for my jacket keeping him from touching my frozen flesh. "I owe you."

"You don't owe me, sir," I answered sheepishly. And he didn't, truly. I acted of my own accord. But his thanks deepened a stabbing pain in my chest...I had been so close to depriving this man of his son so many times that it killed me to see how deep his affection ran...It would kill him to part with Edward.

"No, I do," He said with more fervor, his eyes were the exact same shade, shape and color of Edward's. I had to look down. But his grip on my shoulders tightened. "If there's every anything you need...Just don't hesitate to ask, please."

He gave my shoulders another squeeze before let me go and walked back towards the X-Ray room where Edward had been taken. I exhaled deeply, meeting Carlisle's gaze evenly before deciding to feign a run to the vending machine while I waited for Edward and his results to come back to the ER.

I was barely rounding off the corner when they were coming back. How I could tell was Jessica Stanley's thoughts pouring out relieved torrent, returning to its usual psycho babble.

_He's okay after all. I wonder if he'll still be taking me out on Friday...Probably not. Too soon._

They were back in the ER where Tyler and Jessica started discussing the close call while through Jessica's thoughts, I could see that Edward was closing his eyes. Resting? He wasn't sleeping, because his breathing was way too erratic, and his eyelids were fluttering occasionally. He had requested his Father to get him some water, so there was no sign of the Father now.

I walked to the doorway too, my arms crossed as I stared up at the ceiling for a long moment. Carlisle walked past me with a clipboard in hand, stopping at my shoulder.

_His x-rays look fine. Why don't you talk to him? Smooth things over? I have a feeling he's been wanting to talk to you._

I gave him one curt nod before walking towards the other students.

When Tyler saw me, he opened his mouth to speak, but I cut him off with a shake of my head, nodding towards Edward. "He sleeping?"

At that precise moment, Edward's eyes opened and focused into mine. I had a strong sense that I was being soul-searched which made my whole body run a little colder. But, I smiled at him.

"Isabella, I'm so sorry about what happened," said Tyler fervently.

"Don't worry about it," I assured him, ignoring all the fresh blood barely drying on his skin and clothes less than four feet away from me. It was exceedingly easy. Carlisle had taught me this long ago, to think of something else. It wasn't that for me. It was the fact that this blood, I was pretty positive, had nothing on Edward's.

I sat down on the edge of Tyler's bed with a perfectly raised eyebrow, directing my question to Edward. "So, what's the verdict?"

"There's nothing wrong with my head," He said in a informative voice but it was also clearly accusing the way he was glaring at me. "So, how come you're not strapped to one of these, Isabella?"

"Why don't I share yours?" I teased with a wink. "I hear they're quite roomy enough for two people."

Jessica cleared her throat rather loudly.

"It's all about who you know, Edward," I continued as though Jessica did not exist. And she really didn't. In this room, I had eyes for him alone. "But don't worry, darling. I came to spring you."

Carlisle appeared behind me, brandishing his clipboard with a very soothing smile. I saw Edward stare open-mouthed at us for a moment and cringed inwardly. There was that resemblance...

"Mr. Swan, how are you feeling?" Carlisle asked in his pleasant voice.

"Fine," Edward replied shortly, undeterred by the mannerism and effect Carlisle usually had over humans. Nothing effected this boy, I swore.

Carlisle stepped closer and ran his fingers lightly over his head until finally Edward winced in some pain which made Jessica jump.

"Are you okay?" She shrieked.

"Tender?" Carlisle asked.

"A little," Edward admitted. He addressed Jessica with a faint smile. "I'm fine."

"Your Father is in the waiting room, Edward. You can go home with him now. But come back if you feel dizzy or have trouble seeing," Carlisle suggested.

"What about school?" Edward asked anxiously.

Before Carlisle could answer, Jessica did. "Oh baby, maybe you should take it easy today."

I could see the nickname bothered him, but not nearly as much as it bothered me. She was lucky I didn't have something in my hands at the present moment to throw right in her stupid face. But a chuckle slid through my lips and everyone's eyes fell on me in surprise as if they forgot I was there.

"You cut his food for him too, sweetheart?" I asked, unable to stop myself. Her face flushed purple like it had yesterday afternoon and I caught Edward trying to hide his smile behind a cough.

"Is _she_ going back to school?" Jessica asked Carlisle in a ruder tone than I would have ever allowed.

"Someone has to spread the good news that we survived," I said with another wink at Edward who licked his upper lip and shook his head at me.

"Actually," Carlisle corrected. "most of the school seems to be in the waiting room."

"Awesome, paparazzi," I said in a bored voice.

"Do you want to stay?" Carlisle asked Edward, even though we both anticipated the reaction.

"Nah, I'm good," Edward said, swinging his legs off the side of the bed and standing. He stretched for a moment, rubbing his neck where I could see the muscles had clearly tensed up.

He began to rub the tension knots profusely in an effort to smooth it out. I imagined doing it myself, gripping his shoulders, massaging them, kneading them in a rhythmic manner while his warm body heat slid like snakes through my every vein...

Maybe he'd like my cold touch...He probably felt so warm...So soft and warm...

And where I was watching, Jessica's hand was there all of a sudden. "What's wrong, Edward? Does it hurt?"

Time for me to leave. I heard Carlisle address Tyler and inform him of his staying as opposed to Edward getting let go. I had to stay away from Edward...He may have been trouble, but trouble was me as well. He didn't realize how much. I could kill him as easily as I could do anything else to him.

The longer I stayed around him, the more intense, the more dangerous it was going to get. Hearing it in Charlie's mind only provoked this. I couldn't deprive a father of his son. I couldn't deprive Forks one less in their population...Hell, I couldn't even deny Jessica her dreams of grandeur. I had to leave him.

Quietly was the best bet.

I walked back out into the hallway at a fast pace.

Only to hear footsteps behind me.

'Isabella!" He called in that gentle voice, now more pronounced. I kept walking, pretending I didn't hear him the first time until he halted, spinning right in front of my path to cut me off. His proximity was deliberately close to mine.

His warm breath brushed my face and I had to stagger back a step. Every time he was near me, his scent triggered all of my worst, most primal instincts. Venom flowed inside my mouth and trace scants of blood ran up to my eyes, reddening them. I closed my eyes rapidly before he could see, and my body yearned to strike like a cobra.

"Can I talk to you for a minute? He asked.

So much...for quietly.

"Your father's waiting for you," I reminded him, clenching my jaw.

"It'll only take a minute," He assured me.

"What do you want?" I snapped coldly. I could see my change of tone, of demeanor surprised him. But this had to be it...I could see his eyes widen from my hostility.

"You _owe_ me an explanation," He said, working to match my icy tone.

"I saved your life," I had to make it sound like I regretted that, and I knew I sounded scathing. "I don't owe_ you_ anything."

"You said you'd explain this all to me later back there," He gestured behind him to reference the past and he brought his hands forward, his fast planted on his open palm. "Well, now it's later."

"Edward...You hit your head pretty damn hard back there. You have no idea what you're talking about,"

His eyes narrowed. "There's _nothing_ wrong with my head."

"What do you want, Edward? Hmm? You have people waiting for you. Don't let me hold you up from seeing them,"

"I just want to know the truth," He stated, shrugging his shoulders as if to say he wasn't asking for much. Which he wasn't, in all honesty..it actually hurt me to have to deprive him of the truth he deserved.

"What do you think happened?" I asked, crossing my arms.

"You...," He stopped, exhaling hard and frustrated. I looked away for a moment. "You pushed the van. I saw you...You pushed me...then you pushed the van with your hands."

Damn it. He saw everything.

"I pushed a van...," I repeated this as if I was speaking to a three year old who had just explained he wanted to become president to me. He gave me one stiff nod. And I sneered at him, emphasizing a little nickname for him in a callous voice. "Well, honey, nobody is going to believe that, you know."

He opened his mouth, angry at my mockery of him. He stared deep into my eyes then gave another shrug of his shoulders. "I wasn't...going to tell anyone."

I stared up at him, at those bright green eyes that felt like they were examining the depths of my very core. I could see that he was sincere. Of course. He was a good person...He was loyal, he was kind, he was honest and caring...Forgiving too...Trusting...I wanted him to trust me so badly. I wanted to trust him with this...so badly. He was unlike anyone I had every met in my entire existence. Or perhaps I had only met the dark side of the planet...He was furious...He was betrayed by me, I knew that...But even then, he wanted to keep my secret, keep whatever theories he had, between us.

"Then...," I cleared my throat of venom, ignoring the burn and worked on being hostile again. "Why does it even matter?"

"It matters to me," said Edward simply. "I don't like to lie. Generally, there'd better be a damn good reason as to why I'm doing it...For anyone."

There were certain lines, I just couldn't cross no matter how much I wanted too. I stayed hardened like a haughty teenager. "Edward, can't you just thank me?...And get over it?"

"Thank you," He said, still glowering stubbornly. I could see his fingers twitching.

I gave a falsely sarcastic laugh. "You're not going to let this go, are you, Edward?"

"No,"

"In that case, I hope you enjoy disappointment," I answered cruelly.

He scowled at me.

I spun, turning my back on him where my facade of depravity shattered and I was left stone-faced walking the other direction.

"Why did you even bother?" Edward all but whispered.

His question caught me off guard. I stopped in my tracks, biting hard down on my lip before I gulped and gave him my answer, an honest one, for once. "...I don't know."

I looked at him one last time, still buried in the lines of fury, yet he looked puzzled at my most recent answer. I memorized his face into my mind for the pieces of forever, then I turned and walked away.


	4. Visions

I went back to school because it was the right thing to do, I thought so anyway. In any case,the rest of my siblings were still there. It was better to face the music than run.

By the time I came back, it was already second to last period and I was walking into the Biology with a sour look on my face. This time, though, the students were suddenly very interested in me. It was usual for the eyes of the students to slide away from the freak Cullens.

Mister Banner looked surprised to find me there. "Isabella? I heard you were in the accident this morning."

"I'm fine," I said stiffly as the class held its breath for my response.

_...Closed-off isn't she? _Banner gawked at me. "Have you heard any news regarding Edward Swan and Tyler Crowley? I understand there were some injuries."

I licked my lips while an unpleasant smile formed on my lips. It was a clear sign to back off and I knew the teacher would get the point. "I don't know."

He continued to stare at me while I gave a quick raise of my eyebrow before heading to the empty lab table. Jessica Stanley wasn't here but Mike Newton surely was, and he was staring at my back with awe.

I knew what I was doing was wrong and suspicious. I owed my family a little better than that. After today, I shouldn't have done anything risky...However, it felt wrong if I went around saying Edward probably suffered from a concussion and was very delusional on what he saw. Especially since he had said he wasn't going to tell anyone what he really saw. I believed him...because I wanted to. I had wanted so desperately for Edward to trust him even though there was no reason he should have. But that didn't mean I couldn't trust him myself. He had demonstrated loyalty to me, someone he barely knew.

The class resumed, awkwardly, dismally. I was lost in staring out of the window, only partially interested in the minds of the awe-struck students who were still buzzing about the accident. The rest of me was elsewhere.

I wondered where Edward was now. If he chose to go home or not. Would he tell his Father the real truth? Did they have a tight father-son relationship for that? I never got to ask those questions. It made me curious. I was always close to Carlisle, like a first born child of his...perhaps Edward was close to Charlie Swan in that way too.

Would he tell his girlfriend?

Perhaps it was wishful thinking on my part, but the relationship there seemed to be much less than serious. Edward was simply not as into it as Jessica was. That's what it looked like to me on the outside. I accessed his character so far and deceptive didn't quite fit the norm. I doubted he feigned an interest in Jessica just to keep her happy.

He was probably as interested as she was. It was high school and the time for these bonds was almost a given. Perhaps he would grow to love Jessica if he didn't already. I could see Edward proposing to her, the whole nine yards. He'd get down on one knee and everything.

An ache started rising in my chest as if I had the wind knocked out of me. If it was possible, I might have started hyperventilating..._Why_ did that bother me so much? I had seen countless humans go through these motions before. Pledging to one another, becoming one and calling eachother soul mates. It had never bothered me before...but now when I thought of Edward doing this, it hurt? How odd.

When the bell rang, I was slower than I ever had been in getting my backpack and walking out. I was dreading seeing Emmett in the next class. He wouldn't judge me, but he'd probably tell me how the rest of them were. I didn't want to hear it just yet.

My decision to take my time had its repercussions. Mike Newton decided to escort me to Spanish even though that wasn't exactly his next class.

_She looks like she needs a friend right now._ Was Mike's reasoning. Did I now?

"Hey, Isabella. How are you holding up?" He said, slinging his gray backpack with only one strap over his shoulder while he headed out the door with me.

Holding up? What, did someone die? No. Someone got close and someone came out relatively unharmed. "I'm doing fine...thank you."

"Is Edward all right?" He asked.

"Looked fine when last I saw him," I responded shortly with a shrug of my shoulders. I was being rude, as rude as I was being with Banner. Mike thought that was reserved just for the teacher. Well, Michael. You are no exception.

"Oh," Mike said. He was looking at me from the side, admiring my slender shoulders, my petite physique and the certain way I carried myself that most considered arrogant and snobbish. Wrong place, wrong time.

"What about Tyler?" inquired Mike abruptly when I started quickening my pace so I was a few steps ahead of him.

"I don't know," I responded callously, enunciating each word carefully like I was speaking to someone slow.

_Wow, she's as cold as ice._ Rather than being taken aback or using this as a sign, Mike found this very endearing. Unique. Attractive.

We were at the Spanish corridor now and I turned to say my goodbye to him. "Well, Mike. This was fun. See you later."

I smiled, my lips curling back over my teeth in my hopes of frightening him off.

_Wow, just wow. _He thought, stunned. My display of teeth did_ not_ have the desired effect. He was enamored by my smile. His words came out jumbled. "Uh...Yeah. Y-eah. I'll see you l-later."

I exhaled sharply and entered my classroom. So much for scaring anyone. Maybe Emmett was right and I was terrible at it. He was already sitting in his assigned seat when I walked in. He made no motion nor acknowledgement when I entered. I slid into the chair beside him and felt an urge to sink onto the desk and cover my face. Part of it was for shame, and most of it was for fatigue of mind.

_I don't think I need to tell you how much trouble you're in. _Came Emmett's thought._  
><em>

I glanced at him sideways then back to Mrs. Goff at the front of the class with a small raise of an eyebrow to show I got that.

_Rose is gunna snap. Just warning. I tried to hold her down for you...But you know..._

Yes, I knew nothing could stop Rosalie's fiery rage. I already caught a glimpse of that earlier. I shrugged my shoulders and leaned back.

_Jasper's the one you might have to worry about...He's pretty set on..._

The thought cut off when I saw what Emmett was saying in his head. A conversation that had taken place earlier while I was at the hospital with Jasper stating all too clearly how he intended to deal with this situation. The word situation was used quite often in place of Edward.

"Hmm," I said out loud thoughtfully. So, Jasper was going to kill Edward tonight was he?

Emmett glared at me for a long moment, measuring my expression. He didn't know what to make of the subtle blankness. _I think I know what you're thinking...Come on, Bella._

I could see that Emmett wasn't too far off agreeing with him. It was too risky to Emmett and Rosalie both. The threat of exposure was too grand now...and it didn't matter if Edward had sworn a thousand times not to tell anyone what he saw...The fact that he saw at all was enough.

"You know, Carlisle would never go for that," I said. It was a false hope to think that Carlisle would be able to stop Jasper's plan. Jasper had the most years under his belt without Carlisle. While he respected his adopted Father, he wouldn't go off his course of thought for him so easily.

_He's not planning anything until we talk. Calm down._

"Don't I seem calm to you?" I asked quietly. He assessed my expression. I wasn't one for show and tell, ever. I suppose a few decades of having everyone's private thoughts laid out in front of you made you a close-minded person. Inside, I was laughing without humor. Jasper? Kill Edward? I'd like to see him try.

When the bell rang, Emmett and I silently went to the car. Emmett was weighing his options. If a fight came down, he knew he'd side with his wife. He didn't like that a fight might come at all and he didn't relish the thought of killing a family member.

The rest of them were waiting for us.

Rosalie's thoughts _were_ rather hostile towards me. She was easily reflecting this back on her previous statements. I had finally cracked. I was a rogue vampire from this family with neither care nor concern for any of them but myself. It was funny, I could have said the same about her. Then again, Rosalie hadn't done anything like this and that made me twitch in some annoyance.

Jasper was, as Emmett had said, pretty sure of what he was planning.

Alice was sifting through the future, wholly concerned for her husband and myself. She could see a battle commencing. Whatever Jasper did, I was above, waiting to prepare my defense. Interesting, I was blocking him. While Jasper could surely win in a fair fight, I had the one advantage of seeing whatever he wanted to do seconds before he actually did it same as Alice did.

Rage coursed in me like a snake. While I was usually quite good at hiding my emotions, even from my family, I felt the mask slip and shatter. Alice saw it a second before it happened.

_Bella! _Came her mental scream.

I skidded the Volvo to a halt only a few kilometers from our actual house, near a forested area. I wrenched open the door and climbed out in a blur. No one lived on this road but us, so I didn't give a damn for keeping up appearances. My siblings were out too. Rosalie was fuming as she glared at me.

"Why are you waiting so late, huh Jasper?" I taunted while Alice held her place in front of me, blocking me. I looked over her head at my sibling's stoic face. "He's home right now. Alone, I warrant. If you wait so late, you might have Charlie Swan to worry about too. We wouldn't want that."

"Bella," said Alice warningly.

"Or maybe the more human lives lost the better, " I continued, relentless as I was ruthless. "Old habits and all."

He snarled then, his lips curling back on his teeth. He wouldn't attack with Alice in front of me. I pulled my blazing gaze on her.

"Move," I said.

Her jaw set. "No."

"I SAID MOVE," I shoved Alice, hard into the open door. Three things happened at once. Jasper whipped around in a blur and caught Alice before she hit the metal and Emmett zipped behind me, catching me from behind in the stone embrace of his arms tightly to his chest while Rosalie zoomed next to Emmett, lowering into a hunter's crouch.

"Bella!" Emmett hissed into my ear. "No one is planning anything until all of us talk."

I was breathing hard, my pupils diluting of color and shifting to blood-red. He had my arms pinned to my sides, but if I wanted to, I could break his hold.

"Calm. Down," Emmett ordered. I exhaled deep. He waited until my accelerated breathing fell back into motionlessness before he released me.

"Let's talk then. Let's hear what Carlisle has to say," They all watched me for a long moment. Alice's face was stunned. Jasper and Rosalie were furious and Emmett quite torn. I lightly shoved Emmett so he could give me room before climbing back in the car. After a long, stretching moment where I was sure glances were exchanged, the rest of them piled in as well.

* * *

><p>There was silence all the way down the road to the home. When we got there, I was relieved to find Carlisle's car there. Good, we wouldn't have to wait. I parked and they all got out at once, retreating to the dining table in the kitchen where the prop was given its one use in the house, conferencing.<p>

Esme's eyes were on me, their brown depths, so like mine, full of concern.

_Don't leave._ It was her only thought. A pang of guilt hit me.

Everyone had a hard, determined face. Only Alice sat next to Esme, massaging her temples in what I knew to be exasperation and fatigue over seeing too much. She had never been overloaded as she had been today and a rush of sympathy filled me for her.

"We are all well aware of what happened today," Carlisle began, staring into the eyes of every one in the room. He lingered on me for half a second longer than he should have.

"And if you want details, be sure to ask Bella," said Rosalie, under her breath. I clenched my jaw tightly for a second.

" And while we are all on different view points of the spectrum. I would like to say that...I do not doubt that our existence needs protection. I'd like very much for our family to be worth protecting. The occasional..._accident_ is a regrettable part of who we are. To murder a blameless child in cold blood is another thing entirely. I believe the risk he presents, whether he speaks his suspicions or not, is nothing to the greater risk. If we make exceptions to protect ourselves, we risk something much more important. We risk losing the _essence_ of who we are."

Rosalie exploded then. "We can't allow the human a chance to walk through the town screaming out 'Vampire!'. Carlisle, you _have_ to see that. Even if we all decide to disappear, it's not safe to leave humans suspecting behind us. We have to be more careful than anyone else!"

"Rosalie-" Carlisle began.

"The boy hit his head today. It would be all too _easy_ to assume that the head injury is more than it looks. Internal bleeding leading to death in the middle of the night. It has happened before and we all know how very plausible it could be. I could do it. I'm more than capable of control, since Bella is not," She threw me a scathing look. "I could do this without a single trace of evidence behind me."

"We don't need to be reminded how efficient you are at killing, Rose," I growled.

She bared her teeth but made no further acknowledgement of my retort, her sapphire eyes on Carlisle.

"Killing the boy solves nothing...It invokes pain and misery, Rosalie," said Carlisle.

Much pain. Much misery.

"It's being responsible," Rosalie said, though I could see that her anger, for the moment, had abated. She was hoping her argument would incite agreement on Carlisle's part. It hadn't given the desired effect. I could see that Rosalie was no longer a threat to Edward...mostly.

"Edward won't say anything," I told them all with a hard glance at Alice. "She knows. Alice, back me up."

"I can't see what will happen if we ignore this," Alice said tiredly with a glance towards Jasper and Rosalie.

"You cannot know for certain, Bella," said Carlisle gently.

"I know he won't," I insisted.

"You do not know his mind,"

"Jasper," I said softly, my eyes on him. "I won't let him bare the brunt of my actions.."

Jasper looked back at me, unflinching. "So he should benefit from your actions instead? Bella...I would only set our time here right with the human out of the picture."

I licked my teeth and closed my eyes slowly, my voice dripping with the venom that coursed through every inch of my body. "I won't...let you."

Jasper stared at me shocked, opening his mouth to speak before Alice let out an audible gasp.

The headache, what she had been fighting against this whole time finally took form...

A vision.

It came through a blast of fog. The same static-y fog that Alice had been dealing with me for the last few hours. It had become so clear. Edward, slumped in my arms, bleeding profusely from a punctured throat that spilled onto his white shirt and my dress, dripping down...down..down...While my mouth was gushing with it, oozing with it. My teeth were stained and my eyes were flaming red and fire. In my arms, there was no life in the body I held.

He was dead.

The vision sent a spasm of pain through my body in reality, and I was mildly surprised I did not collapse right then and there.

"Alice," I breathed.

But she was not done. The vision itself melted away to be replaced by a new one. Edward lying on a bed in a familiar room. My room, here in this house to be exact. His eyes were closed, but through this vision, I could hear the racing of his heartbeat.

His heartbeat...It was abnormally fast. I saw myself holding his hand, gripping it tightly as though waiting for something. But for what? He was alive...Edward's eyes steadily opened and what I saw there, rocked the foundation of my existence. His eyes were no longer green but the lightest shade of crimson.

He looked right at me and those feral irises softened as he whispered my name. "Bella."

Abruptly, all those shadowy visions I had seen this morning became crystal clear. It was _Edward _in the meadow with me. The other vague silhouettes became him and me walking together, laughing together. My eyes were warm, lost of the red that threatened to kill us both all the time.

A thrill ran through me.

"NO," I said out loud, breaking out of this visionary stupor, and making six pairs of eyes stare at me in shock. The cry was for both visions. "No, I won't let that happen!"

"Bella," Alice said, staring at me. "Bella, it's going to happen. I've seen it. One or the other."

"No, it can't," I snapped. I cast a look about wildly, stopping at the door. "I'll...I'll leave. I won't come back. I'll wait until he's long forgotten about me...I wo-"

"Can anyone tell me what's goin' on?" Emmett requested looking between Alice and me. These conversations always pissed him off when he was left out of the loop. Jasper had his hand on Alice's shoulder, concerned by the shocking change in the atmosphere. I couldn't answer him. I swallowed hard and shook my head, wanting rather to break something.

"Bella...," said Alice, amazed. "You're in love with him."

"In love with him? With the human she saved today?" Esme asked, just as stunned.

"What did you see, Alice?" Jasper demanded.

"I saw...," She swallowed whole and faced Jasper directly. "She's either going to kill him herself...drain him...or she's going to turn him. Into one of us."

Rosalie gasped.

"It's not going to happen, Alice," I said through my teeth. "Not a chance in Hell."

"In love with him all along?" Emmett remarked, leaning forward to make sure none of us were playing him. When he saw there was no joke, he laughed anyway. "Sorry, Bella."

Alice ignored me, still speaking to Jasper. "She may be strong enough to resist killing him. It will take tremendous control and restraint. It's possible. She's strong enough to do either..." Her eyebrows shot up. "But she's not strong enough to leave. That's a lost cause if I ever saw one."

_Try to think about it, Bella._ She requested. _Consider leaving._

I tried. Right there. I thought about walking out right now and never seeing him again. I was left with another ache in my chest the size of Africa. The same kind of pain I felt when I thought he had been gravely injured on the ice this morning.

Yes, the idea of leaving him hurt me...But I had to, didn't I? If this was the outcome of his life, inevitably entwined with mine? Death or Immortality? Actually, both was death. And why should I have condemned him this.

"...I can't do that," I said, not in response to leaving, but to my own internal battle. "I won't let this happen."

_Oh, grow up, Bella. Can't you see this is where you've been heading all along? Can't you see where you've been? You were drawn to him the moment you saw him. Maybe in not all the right ways. But, you do love him. It's too late to change that._

Jasper's future had cleared. He had no longer any intention to kill Edward Swan. He was confident in Alice's visions. Both of them. If Edward was mine to kill, he was mine to kill. He accepted that. I shook with fury and wished I had something to throw at him...again.

I knew my expression had cracked. Esme was already on her feet, grasping my arm in sympathy. But the sympathy was only on the surface. I could feel her joy on the inside. Like her baby had finally taken it's first steps. It was humiliating. I touched my temple and groaned.

I stepped back to face them all, knowing some of the darkness was shadowing my face. "You're wrong. You're all wrong. I'll prove it wrong. I won't kill him. Neither will any of you, that's for sure." My eyes sparkled with lightning, and I knew how menacing I sounded. "But I promise you this...I'm going to change it."

_Edward, I promise you, too._ I said in my head, knowing no one could hear it but me. I'd ignore him. I'd never talk to him again until he forgot I existed. Let him make the worst-case scenario out of it all. Let him think I lost interest. Let him think it was all apart of his head...I knew our fight before would still be on his mind, let him think I was still fuming over it...

This couldn't be the future...There couldn't be one or the other. There had to be choice.

There had to be.


	5. Invitations

The next few weeks passed and my determination-never wavered. I stayed in Forks to appease Esme and Carlisle who argued blatantly against an option to leave. Still, it was harder to be nearer to Edward and ignore him then be several leagues away where distance proved to be factor.

Still, I remained stubborn, which agitated Alice. Her clarity of the future vanished and changed. Even the visions she had seen before had crumbled and become vague shadows of two possible futures and no longer probable ones. That was the only satisfactory gain of this whole exchange. Every day, it was misery for me. I hated ignoring Edward every minute of every day. I resumed my old routine and simply watched out to see if any suspicion about the Cullens reached fruition. Edward stuck to his word, he hadn't told a soul about me except to say that I was right next to him when Tyler's van approached. People were bored with trying to find out if there was something more. Edward's calm, self-assured voice was enough convincing.

That killed all traces of the desire to kill him from Jasper and Rosalie's mind. They were wary of him, but now that they had heard themselves that he wasn't going to rat me out, it wasn't a problem.

Every day in Biology, we sat in silence. There was no labs where I was forced to speak to him, instead I just pretended as though Edward didn't exist. The first day after he was pleasant, sweet enough to address me with a 'Hello.' While it took all of my willpower to resist just looking at him, I knew it was for the best. For both of us. I wanted to save his life, not damn him, not kill him. I knew he understood when I only gave him a nod without a single eye on him.

He didn't speak to me again, after that. But he did look. Alice warned when he glanced at our table. I didn't know what he was looking for, but he always seemed to focus on me rather than the family much to Jessica's irritation.

Try as I might to ignore him, it was hard not to feel the thoughts of others shrouding him like a cocoon. As the weeks passed, there was a definite change in the atmosphere...For once, I felt no fear for my family. The buzz was for Edward alone. He had joined the football team at Mike and Tyler's bidding.

Tyler who was still flushed with guilt over what happened and had a desire to make up for it. What better way then securing Edward the position of star quarter back? Of course it was not all Tyler's doing. The boy clearly had talent, said the Forks High School newspaper. He was a legend in the making. Three of the scheduled eight games had already been victorious for Forks because of the new addition on the team.

Everyone loved Edward Swan. They paid him so much attention that if the Cullens' mystery was the most prominent thing about Forks High, it took a backseat. I was happy for him, however. I was happy that he seemed to fit in. I always believed that Edward was different from the other generic high school students I could feel in this school. That his mind was different.

The belief never died with the silence of his thoughts. I could never tell if that warm, gentle smile of his was sincere. If that chuckle was true humor when Mike threw lame one-liners out there and tried to incite laughter from the group. I admit the sound of Jessica's raucous giggling was starting to become one of my least favorite sounds in the world. I could tell _that_ laughter was fake. She liked being on the arm of the most popular boy in school. She liked the attention, she liked Edward.

Jessica's thoughts weren't hard to predict. She wondered if Edward regarded their relationship as serious as she did. It was what I wanted to know as well.

I couldn't help but notice the gradual changes in Edward. I had been watching at regular intervals, through Jessica's thoughts, if I had to, or Mike's...I couldn't look at him directly. It was much to risky...But the changes were there. Edward's face paled before going into a game. He had nerves like that. Sickness washed over him. Of the three games I had seen him live through, aftermath of the third was the absolute worst for him.

He was still paler than usual...Purple bruises were starting to ring around his eyes. He wasn't sleeping well. I didn't know why...and the curiosity was killing me.

Sickness...Newfound popularity...None of that stopped Edward from looking my way during Lunch sometimes. It gave me some relief, some measure of hope. He hadn't gone pig-headed in being so well-admired.

At least, I didn't think so. I couldn't tell. The glances in my direction could have been an indication he was wondering how freaky the Cullens were.

Six weeks passed by through strange lurches. I had gotten used to simply stopping my breathing in Biology altogether. It helped loads when I didn't want to kill an innocent teenager seated next to me.

He looked particularly sick that afternoon. Jessica had grown confident now, confident enough to assess that the silence between Edward and myself was long enough that I was no longer a problem to consider. She was truly confident that he would give her a whole-hearted yes to her question about the Spring Dance coming up that was the girl's choice. She was leaning too comfortably on our desk, inclined towards Edward.

"So, Edward," She said, batting her eyelashes in a way that made me want to crush her skull into the wood of the desk. I couldn't process the emotion that came over me at her overwhelming confidence. It was beyond anger, and it was beyond my normal level of annoyance, that was for sure.

"The dance is coming up soon, you know?" I carefully watched Edward's expression as she said this. There was no change. His face was still swollen in the confines of misery and sickness. He didn't look well at all. Not that Jessica noticed or cared. Aside from asking Edward to the dance, most of her thoughts were directed at how Lauren had complimented her new straightened hair style.

Edward blinked and then raised his eyebrows in mild surprise. He sniffed. "Is it? I forgot all about that."

That had to be sarcasm. The posters were everywhere.

"Yes," Jessica simpered. "So...What do you say, Edward? Do you wanna be my..." I stiffened when her eyes slid from her face, to her brave, skinny little fingers suddenly slinking into his. "...date?"

I figured out the emotion fairly quick. Jealousy. I was jealous. So jealous, that it seemed to burn me inside.

Ooh, she was one human. Who cared if the world was to be parted from her? Who would miss this little harpy child with no brain whatsoever? She blocked my view of his face for several seconds before she looked back up into those bright green eyes. There was endless patience there and gentility. Even when Edward was feeling unwell...He was going to...

"I'm not going to the dance, Jessica," He stated quite calmly. "I have somewhere else to be that night."

Jessica's immediate response was not pleasant. "You're not going? Edward. Edward, you have to go to the dance." I could see the pretentious facade of actually liking him as opposed to liking the attention he brought being to crumble.

"I can't, Jessica, I'm sorry," Edward said with an apologetic shrug of his shoulders. He must have given her hand a squeeze because she shot a glance at their entwined hands.

"Are you going with someone else?" And for the first time, in over a month, her gaze shot to me. I had given myself a way by having my chair moderately framed in Edward's direction. Edward didn't follow her gaze, however.

"No, Jessica," He said gently. "I'm just not going."

The curiosity was burning inside of me. It was harder to hold it all back now. I was concerned for him, I told myself. He looked so sick. This pain was not only showing physically, but even I could tell there was something bothering him internally. Trouble at home? Perhaps he missed his mother? I couldn't know for sure...and I wanted to. I wanted to see what was causing him pain. I wanted to smooth it all out and keep him from it.

It seemed I couldn't do it after all.

Alice was right. I wasn't strong enough. There wasn't a chance in Hell I could stay away from him. Leaving him now seemed absolutely absurd to me as it had to Alice then.

_It's her. She has something to do with it. I know she does._ Jessica's venomous thought came. I wanted to shrug my shoulders. I didn't know what it had to do with...but it didn't matter. I'd find out soon enough.

She stalked off to her desk just as Mister Banner began his lecture. Edward turned back to the front with his elbows on the desk, leaning forward. I couldn't see his face...But the gesture seemed so curious, like he was trying very hard not to think of something.

If only I could figure out what that something was right now...

He must have sensed my gaze, because he looked at me then. For the first time, in six weeks, I stared back with hard intensity. God, I had missed those eyes for myself. It was a hundred times better to see through my own eyes rather then the thoughts of others. I could see light beginning to return to his gaze, probing with questions rather than any answers.

I could see my reflection there. My eyes were blackened with thirst I hadn't succumbed to. The plan was tonight...after three weeks without it. Today wasn't a good day to succumb to ravenous curiosity about Edward Swan.

Banner asked me a question then. Turning to glance briefly at the teacher, I plucked the answer straight out of his mind and answered him. "The Krebs Cycle."

Edward broke the gaze the same time I did. I cleared my throat and felt it burn. After all this time, and it was still there. My blatant desire for his blood was killing me slowly.

The rest of the hour passed quickly, and when the bell rang, Edward proceeded to pile his things in his bag with speed. Mike had told him they'd start football practice early in Gym at Coach Clapp's orders while the rest of the class ran laps. Edward hadn't been too happy at this when it was stated at lunch.

"Edward," I said before I could stop myself. Before he was even considering going out the door.

When he turned, all the hesitancy was gone from his face and he looked guarded and slightly wary.

"What? We on speaking terms again?"

I licked my lips and ignored my wretched reaction to the flavor in the air, mostly. "Aha...Not really."

His eyebrows furrowed. "Then what do you want, Isabella?"

My name sounded so hostile coming from his lips, so angry. He was impatient with me. He really didn't want to do this right now. Perhaps another time, when he wasn't so tired. I could only _assume_ these were his thoughts with that expression on his face.

In addition to that, it was the name itself. Isabella. It was my true name, but not the name my family and those familiar had called me.

And in Alice's vision...the way he had said it...so trusting and full of...

"Bella," I said out loud.

"What?" He said, confused.

"It's...," I hesitated. "It's Bella. I prefer to be called Bella."

"Okay," Edward conceded, same tone. "Bella, then. What do you want?"

"I'm sorry. I'm being very rude. I know," Believe me, I do. "It's better this way."

He looked confused again. "I don't get it."

I stood off my stool so that I was looking up in those eyes with the same intensity I had before. It was fair game to warn someone who was in danger that they were in danger. No matter how subtle. "It's actually better if we're not friends. If you know what I mean. Trust me."

His eyes tightened reflexively and I could see the anger color his face and tone. I had asked him to trust me before and it hadn't produced good results. Oh, he may have looked dead on his feet before(which was irony with me next to him), but now I could see fury sparkle like lightning in his eyes. I cringed when he teeth clenched together.

"It's too bad you didn't figure that out earlier, Bella," He snarled down at me. "You could have saved yourself a whole bunch of regret."

As usual with Edward, his answer startled me and I was taken aback. "Regret...Regret for what, exactly?"

"For not letting the van crush me," Edward snapped and enunciated my name into two syllables. "Bell-a."

I stopped, forgetting to breathe altogether while that sunk in. Is that where his thought process had been running since I stopped talking to him? I remembered my resolve let Edward assume the worst about my silence. I didn't think for a second that he would jump to that conclusion. Not the one thing I had done right since I had met him. My family would have said otherwise...but it was never something I had regretted or wished I could take back.

"You think...,"It took a supreme effort to remain level. "I regret saving your life?"

"I don't think that, no," He retorted with a shake of his head. "I _know_ you do."

I fumed in silence for a long moment, closing my eyes while red fury passed them. My voice came out fierce. "You don't _know_ anything."

He gave a lift of his eyebrows once as if to let me prove it. When I didn't, he shrugged his muscled shoulders and strode out of the room, leaving me to seethe behind him. No wonder I couldn't read Edward Swan's mind. His mind jumped to the most irrational, most incomprehensible conclusion. He definitely didn't have the mind of the other students. Not anywhere near it.

As he began to leave, he stopped at the doorway, his hard eyes on me for the tiniest fraction of a second, a challenge rose clear in his face and a crooked smile formed. He winked at me before he walked out.

Oh, he was absolutely infuriating sometimes.

I couldn't help but find some of it endearing...Some of it.

When I entered Spanish, Emmett was waiting for me in our usual seats. He gave a wry smile when he saw the harshness of my expression. No one else bothered to look at me, though, everyone wanted to see Edward practice after this period, the girls mostly.

_Let me guess, you got close to snapping today or something?_ He mentally asked in a chiding tone.

"It's like that everyday," I reminded him. "and no. It's a long story."

Emmett shrugged. This whole thing was beyond him.

I could easily tune out Spanish given that I knew the language ten times better than the teacher herself. She gave me latitude. I wasn't one to show off these skills and try to be a smart ass. She liked that. The only time she was aware of the Spanish excelling hers was when she saw it as she was grading papers which was just fine with me. It gave me time to think.

I couldn't ignore Edward. That much was pretty clear. So, where did that leave me? Why wasn't there a third future where he perhaps blew me off and made it more evident that he didn't want to talk to me ever again. How come I wasn't receiving that? How come I had _never _received that? Did that mean anything?

_Why?_

When the bell rang, Emmett and I stood up, gathering our bags and preparing to leave...When I was struck with an idea.

"Emmett," I dug into the pocket of my navy blue skirt on the side and took out the car keys. He stared, puzzled as I put them in his open palm. "Don't wait up for me. I got a few things to take care of."

_Poor kid. Lost her mind..._Emmett thought, but he nodded and gripped down on the keys before going through the exit doors while I ran off in the opposite direction passed the crowd of kids that were heading towards the parking lot.

I made sure not to make any skin contact, which was hard to do with my choice of a white halter top. But I managed to make it to the gym which was completely empty. Through the opposite exit, I could hear Coach Clapp yelling out at his practice players to hustle while he had them running laps. I gave a quick glance around me before skipping towards the exit. It was all too easy to see, along with my perfect vision how football practice looked.

To my left side, I could see the girls crowding at the steel wire fence near the portables intently watching the boys run laps as if it was an actual game.

_Is that him?_

_Which one's Edward? They're all wearing jerseys.._

_I bet he looks good when he's sweating. Jessica is soooo lucky. I just wanna **eat** him up._

_There he is!_

I followed this one's thought and gaze to the number 35 player. It was Edward indeed wearing navy blue and white, like me right now. Was it just me, or were his movements sluggish as he ran? I could see him expelling a breath each time he took a running step. Thank God I wasn't running with him. I don't think I'd be able to stand it for very long.

The girls were right about one thing. He definitely looked sexy while he was sweating and in practice mode. Even so many meters away, I could see the perspiration dripping down the sides of his face and matting in his beautiful bronze hair.

The coach had them do all kinds of drills, practicing tackling, practicing throwing...He demonstrated a few times on poor Mike Newton who looked like he might have formed an ulcer by the end after how many times he had been the practice dummy for tackle practice. Poor kid. I might have felt sorry for him.

But it was like I always thought. Playing football in this town might as well have had you playing mud wrestling with jerseys on. Indeed, every single boy was caked head to toe with mud and water by the time practice was over. They all piled back towards the locker room doors to the side of my place with mirrored exhausted looks. The girls at the fence were starting to leave now that the darkness was spreading overhead.

"Good job, ladies," Coach Clapp was saying. I saw him distract Edward, clasping his shoulder as the taller boy started heading slowly after the rest of them. "You're doing great, Swan. Just keep up that attitude and play at the game and we'll have that cup in no time."

"Yes sir," Edward said with forced fervor. Even I could hear the exhaustion in his voice.

"Good boy," Clapp replied, giving him one last squeeze before Edward was chasing after his teammates. I could hear the sound of the rowdy boys even from here. _You're gunna make all pro one day, boy. I trust that._

Clapp was coming back my way, but I wouldn't let him see me. I pulled on my sunglasses from my bag and slid them on, disappearing into the shadows of the darkened gym.

It only took twenty minutes for the boys to begin to leave.

Maybe I'd go to Edward, make up for our argument earlier today. Take him up on that challenging look he gave me.

I headed back to the open gym exit. I watched one by one as each boy started heading past the steel wire fence for their respective car or parents' car.

All but one.

Edward hadn't come out yet...How odd. I looked back in the gym behind me. There was a light in Coach Clapp's office. What now? He was probably doing late night work and leaving soon. What should I have done? Gone to him and asked that he checked the locker room cause I was a self-absorbed creeper girl who didn't see Edward Swan leave?

Sounded right, but I wasn't going to do it. I looked back outside, waiting for the scent to splash me in this rain.

I hopped off the stairs leading down to the blacktop and shamelessly entered the lighted boys locker room. There were several rows and rows of yellow lockers that were taller than me. But I could smell Edward's scent. Faintly, but it was there.

"Edward?" I called in a not-too-loud voice, but loud enough for anyone in this locker room to hear me at least distantly wherever they were. "Oy, Swan! I wanted to catch your practice! I always said football in Forks is like mud-wrestling with jerseys on. Now that I've seen it first hand, I don't think I'll be taking that back!"

There was no answer to this. Not even a clatter in response to my loudness.

After sifting through the rows, I paused to try to waft the terrible smell of sweat attacking my senses. Overwhelming. I must have been near the just-used showers. I turned from it in a 360 motion and froze.

There was Edward, lying flat on his front on a bench between the lockers. My mouth opened in shock and I almost assumed the worst, except that as I ran down the row, I heard the steady rhythm of his heartbeat getting clearer and clearer as I approached.

"Edward...," I murmured, watching him. His head was resting at a slightly odd angle, pulled back slightly so that the back of his head was almost on the verge of falling. His mouth was closed though, so he was breathing through his nose and there was little movement done to his head because of this. There was only his jacket as a cushion underneath his body...How could he have fallen asleep so quickly?

He must have been exhausted. His feet were completely flat on the opposite ending with his toes touching the bench. Looked uncomfortable, to me.

Maybe I shouldn't have bothered him. It was bad enough that I was here. I pulled off the shades and slid them through my hair so that my long hair wouldn't get in my face.

How did I ever think this boy looked plain? Even now, disturbingly vulnerable in sleep, he took my breath away. If I were breathing, I thought wryly. He had the most flawless face and body I had ever laid eyes on...

He didn't wake for any sound...Too deep of a sleep, I guessed. I guess I could just tell Coach Clapp that his quarterback was still here and needed a ride home. I could give him that much. I began to walk away.

"Bella," Edward said.

I froze, glancing back at his unopened eyelids.

Had he woken up? He looked asleep, still. I knew usually when humans were waking up, sometimes they had their eyes closed for longer while their bodies did the waking. He hadn't moved his body an inch and his breathing remained even. His mouth had slightly opened so I knew he had said my name and it definitely wasn't a hallucination.

I remained unmoving for the longest moment in my life.

"Bella," He mumbled again, softer this time, but I heard it, because I was listening for that voice.

He was dreaming of me.

A new emotion coursed through every inch of my body, right there. As frozen as I was on the outside, inside it felt like everything was moving, every part of me was reacting. The emotion, the feeling I had been suppressing and refusing to face for so long was bubbling to the surface at last, beyond my control, beyond my comprehension until now.

Alice was right again. I had been blinded. I didn't see where I was heading. I didn't see where I had been for who knew how long. Perhaps the very moment I saw him. I certainly couldn't be sure with all my denials and inconsideration for it. We were immortal, we were frozen in the very essence of what we were in our human life for the rest of eternity. When a change came, that change, too, would be apart of us for the rest of eternity.

I could see it. The core of my siblings, my adoptive "parents" had the very root of themselves still kept in place. Rosalie, who was cold to her very marrow...This feeling had softened her somewhat. Redeemed and relieved some of the bitterness she kept in store and gave her a measure of peace.

I loved him. I would love him for the rest of my existence, and nothing could change that.

Pain colored my features while he slept on, unaware of my presence on the outside.

I inhaled deeply and let his scent saturate every part of me. My throat gave its burning response, but I was stronger than that for the moment. I had to get used to it if I was going to stay near him in any sort of way. It would take strength, strength I probably didn't have right now. One thing at a time, right?

I knelt in front of him, raising my knees up and memorizing every detail of his face. I could leave him one day, couldn't I? I loved him. I loved him enough to protect him from me. Maybe not right now, but someday.

"Edward," I whispered, hoping my voice didn't wake him. It didn't. He stirred marginally and resumed his normal breathing pattern. I wet my lips and tried again. "Edward, I love you. More than you can ever imagine...I love you enough...that I want to save you, from me. It's dangerous, for both of us if I were to stay here with you."

I expelled a soft breath. If I could produce tears, my eyes would be filling right now. "But...I don't..._want_ to leave, Edward. I don't want to be parted with you, ever again. It was hard for me...Hard for me to stay away from you, to keep that promise I made. I know why that was now...I'm not going to lie to myself anymore...It's selfish, I know. Because that means I have to keep you out of the loop...I don't want to...because I care for you...so much."

Edward's lips twitched. I reached, hesitantly at first, to lay my hand on his cheek. He felt burning hot beneath my skin, even though I was touching him as little as possible. His breathing stopped just for a moment from the initial touch.

"I have to lie to you, Edward...And I'm sorry...I'm so sorry," I knew my words were searing with more than just apologies for lying. I closed in and felt his heady scent close in on me, triggering my terrible instincts. Loving him wouldn't stop me from killing him...But I pushed it back with a hard effort and pressed my lips very lightly to his forehead, closing my eyes and staying there for a moment while the overwhelming heat of his body passed through me like an electrical current.

I opened my eyes and whispered. "The truth hurts, Edward...And if I can keep you from pain, I will."

It was done. I had to leave, now.

I was just starting to pull myself to my feet where I hoped to get one last look at him before leaving when something yanked me downward.

Edward's fingers were clasped around a few strands of my hair. His eyes were still closed, his breathing even and untainted, but once more he said- "Bella."

_Now what? _He was holding on so tight...And...well...I didn't want to wake him up.

"...Don't leave," Edward whispered. It was different coming from his voice rather than Esme's when she requested the same thing..His voice sounded vulnerable...alone... I cleared my throat of the scorching feeling and knelt again.

I laid my head gently beside his, resting my cheek against my interlocked hands.

We stayed like this for the longest moment while I listened to the sound of his heartbeat in tune with the feel of his breathing. I felt oddly at peace, knowing that problems would come later, slowly, but surely...but as of the moment, it just felt good to be beside him.

* * *

><p>That was, until I could hear the thoughts of another coming. The jumbled, near-incoherent thoughts of Charlie Swan come to look for his son himself.<p>

Uh oh. I pulled away from Edward's head and gently pried his fingers loose from my hair. I knew the freezing cold of my touch had woken him this time, because his breath caught.

Before he opened his eyes though, I was gone, flitted to a position in front of the darkened fire exit in the corner, a couple of meters away. Edward awoke with a gasping breath coming face to face with his concerned Father.

"You all right?" Charlie asked out loud. "What're you doing here still?"

Edward groaned. "I must have fallen asleep, Dad. I'm sorry."

"You look like Hell. Come on. I'll have Waylon take your truck home. Let's go," He laced his arm through his son's and pulled him up to his feet.

I could see through Charlie's thoughts that Edward looked slightly bewildered and if possible, even more exhausted than before. But I knew he'd chalk off any sequence with me as a dream. Or at least I hoped so. After all, there was no sign of me here, was there? What would a girl be doing in boys locker room? As Coach Clapp lingered in the doorway waiting for Father and Son to arrive, I suppressed some satisfaction at my stealth.

When the lights turned off, I waited a few more minutes for the thoughts of both men to fade into silence before slipping out into the night after them, a broad smile plastered on my pale face.


	6. Blood Type

The next morning I arrived later than my siblings because I chose to run instead of ride with them. I wanted to catch Edward by myself, without the thoughts of anyone following me as I did. That included the other Cullens. When I stood in the thick woods that bordered the pavement. I was sure Alice was well aware of my place here, having informed the other three about what I was up to. I found I didn't care much for their approval or not. I just didn't need the distraction while speaking to Edward.

He arrived a little late himself when I heard the rumbling of his truck in the distance. I made myself as a whole known by approaching the Volvo and leaning coolly against the trunk on the opposite end while Edward began to park.

I wanted to smile with nothing humorous in the picture. Just because my whole existence had taken a devastating change yesterday night, it didn't mean he reciprocated anything for me. I was so full of myself. It was great.

Perhaps it was better that way. I was already leaving warnings for Edward, wasn't I? It was fair game from here on out.

He was exiting now, jingling his keys as he proceeded to lock the driver side door. He looked a little better with some sleep under him. The purple bruises around his eyes had finally faded away.

My own, however were as prominent as ever, and I was the one looking like I lacked on sleep. In fact, I didn't look like I was even dressed for the cold again, unlike him with his navy blue and white letterman jacket with the hood from his black hoodie underneath covering that beautiful head of bronze hair and regular jeans of the same color. I could tell the jacket was of the high school's own brand with the little emblem below the right shoulder.

I decided to refrain from wearing black today, for once. Just a colorful, floral print shirt with short sleeves and a deep neck line with tight blue jeans. It still looked like Summer clothing. My leather jacket was in the car somewhere.

As he walked on, he dropped his keys into a puddle. While he bent down to pick them, I flitted across the parking lot in one motion until I was sitting against the back of his truck, in front of the license plate, as if I had been there all along.

When he passed me, he jumped a bit, eyed widened on my face. He lowered his gaze to my apparel in one swift glance with what I could guess was incredulity.

Such an adorable expression, even if he was still angry.

"How did you do that?" He demanded.

I crossed my arms. "Do what?"

"Appear out of thin air," Edward remarked with a not-so-stealthy glance towards my Volvo that was nothing short of contemptuous.

"Magic," I told him with a quick raise of my eyebrows to feign excitement or a well-kept secret.

"Hmm," was all he said, not appreciating my attempt at lightness. He was still angry about yesterday. He hesitated on stepping forward. Stand and idly chat with me or stomp off to class in a storm. Which sounded better?

There was silence between us for the longest time. I stood up and drew closer to him, which made him step back.

Those eyes, as bewildered as they were now...so beautiful. I could get lost in them forever and never find my way back.. The proximity between us was damnable.

He expelled a foggy breath that all but clouded me for a moment. I stopped breathing for a moment while his scent billowed past. A stupid maneuver on my part. I was supposed to be getting used to this, not avoiding it.

"So, I couldn't help overhearing that you're not going to be attendance at the Spring Dance," I stated nonchalantly, trying to be casual.

"No," He answered firmly, with less patience then he gave Jessica. "I'm going to Seattle that weekend."

"Family visit?" I asked coolly.

"No," He answered, turning towards the school itself. An emphasis on his part that if he didn't get going, he might be late. "Just needed to see the city."

"All by yourself?" I asked, feigning shock. "Well, that won't do. Why, you might get mugged with your attire."

I stepped next to him and tugged on the arm of his letterman jacket. He started walking, irritated now.

"Probably not," He remarked.

"Probably, yes. The city's a big place. And are you even sure your truck can make it?"

"There's nothing wrong with my truck," He said with a glance behind us.

I kept pace with him. "Are you sure it can make it on one tank of gas? It looks like it might collapse if you try."

"Why are you asking?" He asked, still guarded. He stopped in his tracks to look down at me, wide-eyed.

He stopped my breathing for a moment. Was it so surprising I was curious about him? Or that I was leading on to wanting his company? He must have went to the worst conclusion about my behavior. I'd have to make it up to him.

"I was just wondering if you wanted a ride," I offered. A car with him, alone...confined...There was a burn in my throat for response.

Edward stared at me blankly. "With who?"

"Me, of course," I answered with a hand to my chest.

His eyebrow shot up and his lips became slightly thinner. "Why?"

"Well," I tried again with the casual. "I was going to take a trip to Seattle anyway...Honestly, I can't see that old thing making it there without killing your transmission."

"That...," He lingered on the word, seeming to choose his next words carefully before speeding off towards the entrance to the cafeteria. "is none of your business."

It wasn't a no. That's all that kept me walking from the hostile boy. "Wasting natural resources is a concern to everyone who loves the environment."

"Bella," If I had a heartbeat, it would have sped up when he said my name. "I can't keep doing this with you. I thought you said you didn't want to be my friend."

Not exactly. "I said it's better if we weren't friends. Not that I didn't want to be."

"Oh, now that that's cleared up...," Edward replied sarcastically, leaving his sentence high and dry as he glanced at me.

He stopped underneath the cover of the cafeteria roof now and were my balance not perfect, I might have run in to him. I stopped too, looking up into those huge emerald eyes that were like two giant gem stones in a clear lake. I had to keep the conversation from steering out of light, but it was too hard when he was looking at me like that with deliberate intensity, like he was the one trying to figure my mind out rather than the other way around. I lost my grasp on light conversation.

"It'd be better if we weren't friends, " I whispered. "But I'm tired of trying to stay away from you, Edward."

His expression softened somewhat. I knew he wanted something honest out of me, and that was it. That was as honest as I could put it without scaring him off.

"Can we go to Seattle together?" I asked, point blank, my voice shaping around the word 'together' like a caress while my eyes burned into his.

A muscle twitched in his jaw and I saw he had to struggle for words. "Yeah."

Jubilation filled me. I had to work from showing too much of it on my face. When I stepped back to give him room, I smiled. "Good...Well...I'll see you in class."

I winked at him before he stepped inside while I headed in the opposite direction towards the History building.

* * *

><p>Classes passed by all too slow for me. Perhaps it was my anxiousness to see Edward again. Our classes were so different on opposite ends of the school, so finding him in the hallways between classes was pretty impossible.<p>

I couldn't help but reflect back on our last conversation, wondering if I had done the right thing. Maybe I came off too pushy? It was dangerous for us both...I had no control around him, and with him, I said and did things that didn't seem like me. It was because his life was so precious to me...That it felt like the more careful I was, the more likely I was to screw up.

I wanted the resolve to say I was totally strong enough to withstand anything that happened between us. I wasn't sure on that though. Loving him meant nothing if I was going to hurt him down the line. Of course, I would make a conscious effort to keep myself from hurting him.

But our futures clearly said there was only two ways down...

Finally, I was walking out of Gym with a fresh wave of relief at the thought of seeing Edward again. Everything would be fine, I told myself. I just had to be careful...and I could be careful. I had been for so many decades. Easy as pie. If it ended badly...well at least I tried right?

I had to stop myself from mentally cringing then.

At lunch, I decided to sit at a table that was usually empty off to the side. When my siblings passed me by, none of them looked my way. I guessed Alice had already forewarned them about my decision.

_Jesus Christ, Bella._ Was Rosalie's thought as she sat down.

"Don't take the lord's name in vain," I said sarcastically in an undertone so only those with acute hearing could get it.

_Smooth sailing_. Jasper thought wryly.

_Can vampires go crazy?_ Emmett thought, rolling his eyes.

"Demented, maybe," I responded.

_I can't wait to meet Edward!_ ..Alice beamed at me from across the cafeteria.

"Who says you get to?" I said, pausing in the act to feign drinking from my chocolate milk, my lips moving too fast for anyone to think I was talking.

Her demeanor changed to serious for a bit. _Don't forget about the biology lab today. We already skipped ours._

I nodded. Couldn't forget that anytime soon.

The moment Edward walked in, surrounded by his crowd of popular kids, I stiffened. His eyes flew to my usual table and he frowned. It seemed like I was the only one to care to notice this. Mike was jabbering on about the dance and Tyler wanted to talk football. Jessica was still furious that Edward had denied her invite to the dance..

Edward set his tray down and took his usual spot.

"Isabella Cullen is staring at you again, bro," Mike commented in a low voice so Jess wouldn't hear. "Wonder why she's sitting alone today..."

Edward's eyes flew first to our table as if to confirm I hadn't moved. Then he whipped his head around to look at me. I couldn't help but smile at his bewilderment. I motioned with my finger for him to join me and he looked slightly startled with his eyes sliding towards Jessica as if to emphasize something.

I gave a shrug of my shoulders and continued to smile.

"I think she means you," Mike said, giving Edward's shoulder a shoulder shove.

"Probably needs help with some homework or something," Edward replied. I could see him beginning to stand.

"Sure," said Mike skeptically.

"Hold down the fort for as long as you can, all right?" Edward asked with a glance towards Jessica. He stood fully upright, gathered his tray and began to walk towards me.

He stopped short on the opposite end of of my table where I inhaled deeply and felt the dry ache throb inside my mouth, even though I had already fed just a little bit before dawn.

"Why don't we sit together today?" I suggested with a glance at the chair below him. He set his tray down and pulled the chair back so he could sit. He slung his backpack over one side of the chair in the process.

"Bella," Edward hissed reproachfully. "What is this? You know I'm with..."

"Jessica?" I finished for him with a glance at her behind him. Mike hadn't done well with 'holding down the fort'. Jessica was glaring daggers at Edward's back. I ignored the vicious tenor of her thoughts. "That's a joke, right?"

"It is not," Edward replied defensively. "She's just-"

"Like every other teenage girl in this school who views you. Honestly, Edward. You don't seem to be taking the relationship as seriously as she does. Isn't that a little unhealthy?"

He seemed a little affronted by this. But after a moment, his expression cleared. "Is that right? What view is that?"

I leaned back in my chair and crossed my arms. "To date the high school quarterback is like being courted by a Duke. It's a real honor. Haven't you seen the teen movies?"

His next question surprised me, as was the scathing manner he threw it at me. "Do_ you_ view me like the other girls?"

I looked into those bottomless green eyes for a long time. He was joking, but only partially. My actions in the past had left me bewildered and even a little hurt most likely. He didn't know what I wanted.

"Well...,"I took my time answering this one, deciding to keep it light. I didn't want to creep him out. "There's your looks."

He frowned again, deterred by my lack of seriousness. It was a vast relief when he chose to change the subject. He glanced between us, at our so-far untouched meals then up to my face again. "This is different."

"Hmm," I said to give the impression that I was distracted. "I decided as long as I was going to Hell...I might as well do it thoroughly."

What made me say that? Everything was so uncertain around him. I couldn't make sense of my own thoughts.

He stared me as though I had left the sentence unfinished. When I didn't continue, he sighed while I reflexively held my breath. "You know, I have no idea what you mean."

"I know," I winked.

_What the hell does she think she's doing? He belongs here. This is our table. She's a bitch. I hate her. I hate her. I hate her so much_... Jessica.

"Your girlfriend's getting pissy," I commented cheerfully, glancing over his shoulder. I had been called much worse than that, and it's not like the expletive was totally uncalled for.

He didn't seem as concerned as I thought he might. "She'll live. We're not doing anything. It's not like this is a date."

That was good. It showed he didn't let her control everything.

"It's a lunchroom date,"I corrected teasingly. "Secrets in the Forks High Cafeteria. Oh no."

He didn't appreciate my humor, once again. His eyebrows furrowed. "What brought this on, anyway?"

"I told you," I reminded him. "I'm tired of staying away from you. Or trying to, anyway. I'm just going to do what I want now. It's quite liberating, Edward. Let the chips fall where they may...or lay...I couldn't ever figure out which one of those two it was...Probably may."

"You lost me...again."

Ah, that was good. "I always say too much when I'm around you. That's one of the problems."

Which was nothing compared to the other problems.

"Don't worry," He said with a small twitch of his lips. "I don't understand any of it."

I placed my chin on my palm. "I'm counting on that."

"So, in plain English...Are we friends now?"

I thought about that. Friends sounded so low compared to what I wanted from him. "Friends..."

"Or not," He said as though he was expecting my rejection.

Did he think I didn't like him that much? I had to double my efforts. I leaned forward to trap his gaze again "We can try, I guess...But I should warn you...I'm not a good friend for you."

He stared at me for a long moment. The truth hurt...and it hurt me more considering what I felt for him. I wanted him to understand it though. I wanted a lot of things from him that were near impossible...

"You say that...a lot," He observed quietly.

"Because you're not listening to me, Edward," I said intensely. Some part of me wished that he had heard my warning in the locker room last night. It would have made things a little easier for him to understand. "I'm still waiting for you to believe it. If you're smart, you'd avoid me. You'd walk away, right now."

"...So...as long as I'm not being smart, we'll be friends?" He asked, trying to make sense of my logic.

"That sounds right," I stated, leaning back again.

He locked his tongue into the side of his mouth and looked away. I watched a muscle twitch in his jaw again. I wished I knew what he was thinking...but then...I could ask, finally. For once. What was the harm in knowing what had tormented me for so long?

"What are you thinking?" I said a little too impatiently.

"I'm trying to figure out what you are...,"He spoke hesitantly, meeting my gaze while his breathing ceased for a moment. "You're...You're not like any other girl I've ever met before. You're...different. It's..."

He shook his head then and shrugged.

Panic swept through me and I had to work to keep my expression from betraying anything. What were his thoughts on me? What had he come up with? I could feel the panic mirror in my siblings across the way.

The fear was gone from my voice and a century's worth of acting is what made my facade come through for me in this regard. "I could say the same about you, Edward. You're not like anyone I've met before, either."

This was true. I was glad to be honest with him on something and hopefully detract from his wandering theories, for the moment.

It worked. His eyes widened and I saw the beginnings of a remonstrating smile begin to form on those gorgeous lips. "I thought I was like all the star quarterbacks from the teen movies."

He was joking. And for once, it was I who was not. "No." I said, more firmly then I should have. I stared at him, hard. Vigorously trying to break the wall keeping me from his thoughts that would prove my words completely true. "No, you're not. You're...something more. You have a...greatness in you. It doesn't come from the mind, it comes from who you are."

He blinked a few times, startled by this. I thought he was going to fumble his words into nothingness, but his voice came out steady. "How would you know that...or rather, how could you think that? You barely know me."

That was true. With the silence of his thoughts, it was more apparent. "No...I don't know you as well as I'd like to...but the beauty of free will is that we are free to assume with what little we know."

He had the same free will, same option. What would happen if he guessed right? I had to know...Was this our last conversation? Would I be denied ever telling him how I felt? It was harder to contain pain than panic. "Tell me one theory of yours, Edward."

"About you?" He asked me, still clearly reeling over what I had said and how I had said it.

"Yes,"

"I can't," He said with a shake of his head. "It's embarrassing."

"I won't laugh," I promised.

"Yeah, you will," He chuckled.

"Hit me," I said as though it was a poker game. He shook his head again as though I was being silly. I stared deep into his eyes. "Please?"

Edward blinked rapidly again, seeming to lose his train of thought. "What?"

Too much. "Please tell me one of your theories?"

He scratched his head, pouring out the words automatically. "Er..masquerading as a cat suit wearing vigilante at night?"

I paused to purse my lips and contain a laugh, my relief was instantaneous. "...Well, I left my whip at home."

"You said you wouldn't laugh," He grumbled.

"And I am not," I reminded him. "I do need new black boots though, you just reminded me."

"Whatever,"

"That's not very creative," I chided him.

"Sorry...It's all I've got...," He muttered.

"You're not even close,"

"No whips?" He asked with a smile.

"Nope,"

"I'll figure it out eventually," He promised.

My face fell, all joking gone. "I wish you wouldn't try, Edward."

"Why not?"

I sighed and closed my eyes for a moment, trying to think of how to answer him without sounding like I was inadvertently threatening him. "Your theory was half-right. To some respect...What if I'm not the heroine? What if I'm the villain?"

He was silent for the longest moment and I could feel the tension in the air. He wet his lips. "Oh...I see."

"Do you?" I asked, trying to hide my anguish.

"You're dangerous, then?" He guessed. I could see this wasn't hard to work with. I may have been a female, but Edward had been exceptionally observant of me before. I knew he could see right through any typical feminine stereotype I might have tried to uphold. Being dangerous wasn't so far off the mark for him. After all, he had seen my murderous look on that dreadful first day.

What would I do now that he had finally understood my scant warnings and my subtle hints? I wanted to convey that message to him somehow. Communicate just how much I loved him before he ran away, back to his normal life, without me in the way.

"You're not bad," said Edward firmly, without a trace of fear. "Bella. You're not bad. You're not a villain. I don't believe that."

Of course I was bad. I shouldn't have been happy that he was giving me much more goodness in thought than I ever deserved. He didn't know what I had done, and what I had thought about him alone. He didn't know that I was fighting every impulse to murder him right there because of basic, primal instinct.

I loved that he thought I was good, but he was wrong. So very wrong.

"You are wrong...," I breathed softly. "You're so wrong."

He opened his mouth to speak when the loudness of the cafeteria reached a new high. People were beginning to leave. Edward stood up. "We're going to be late for Bio."

"I'm not going to class," I told him, still trapped in my own snarl of thoughts.

"Why not?"

I don't want to end your life. "It's healthy to ditch now and again."

It was better for the vampires to ditch when human blood would be spilled several times within the confines of a classroom.

He slung his backpack over his shoulder. "Well, I'm going."

I smiled up at him. "I'll see you later then."

He stared down at me for a long moment, deliberating. I dared to hope he might have decided ditching would be better and stay with me. But, he didn't. The bell rang and Edward hurried off with the other students in a rush.

I waited until he was completely out of sight before I relaxed in my chair and took a huge inhale of the tainted air. Edward's scent was lingering. I moaned out loud when I felt the burn in my throat and the venom forming in my mouth. I swallowed, feeling the effect worsen.

_Get used to it._ I told myself.

* * *

><p>I left the cafeteria in a rush, past the tardy students lingering in the hallways, past the next lunch students.<p>

I didn't stop until I was in my car, sticking in my favorite CD and putting the volume up as high as it could go. Like the first day, the music wasn't really helping me stay calm. My mind strayed to the conversation with Edward, replaying it to perfect detail back in my head. He didn't hate me, that much was sure. He was probably intrigued by me. Humans tended to like what they couldn't understand. I found him interesting too...but I couldn't afford to do that. What was it? Was it too late?

Never, I told myself. It was never too late.

I still had choices. Edward still had choices. He was too good. Too kind, too noble, too sweet, too gentle to harm. I mentally berated myself. Why? Why was he so cursed with such an appealing scent to me alone? Even Jasper had trouble adjusting, but he hadn't had this problem to the degree that I did. I had felt his thirst before in my head...and it was nothing to this. Even though the humans practically all smelled the same to him.

I didn't have time to bask in self-loathing any longer when a wave of mental anxiety swept through my haze.

_Is he looking at my face? Yeah he should be looking...I wonder if he'll carry me._

A hundred yards away, Edward was lowering Jessica's limp body onto the sidewalk. She slumped against the concrete, her face, whiter than usual.

I opened my door out of curiosity and her words became prominent.

"Oh, Edward. Will you carry me?...I can't walk," She was saying, beginning to swoon. What was going on?

I started running over. "Edward?"

He turned around to face me, surprised as I drew closer.

"What's wrong?" I asked, when I was a bit more within earshot.

"She fainted. All that blood. She didn't prick her finger," Edward informed me which made me stop directly where I was, and stop breathing. Was he bleeding? Did he prick his own finger? Forget that Jessica had used the poorest tactic ever to win her boyfriend's attention back to her. I grounded my teeth together. His scent was one thing. His fresh blood was another thing altogether.

"I'm taking her to the nurse," Edward continued when I said nothing. He placed one arm underneath Jessica's knees and another supported her back. He lifted her up and began to walk, while I remained standing, not daring to inhale. Over Edward's shoulder, Jessica gave me a smug smile while I worked to control my expression.

"Get a bandaid while you're up there!" I shouted with the last of my oxygen.

I turned away while the effects of his scent whispering in the air washed over me like acid in my throat. My reaction was violent this time because of the thought of the sweetest blood being so within my grasp and now so unfairly taken away. The moan that came through my lips this time was nearly tangible, choking me. So close. So close. So close. My retinas began to flush scarlet and though I was usually gorged on the blood of grizzly and deer, it made little difference to me in that moment.

I pressed my fingers to my temples and attempted to calm myself down, but there was a bestial proclivity inside of me that wanted nothing more than to stalk behind the two lovebirds and take one of them for my own.

I had to get out of here. Now. I began to head back towards the parking lot when I nearly ran front first into Alice.

"What? I didn't. Don't start," I growled through my teeth, stalking past her.

"I know you didn't," She answered calmly.

"And I didn't go to class either. You knew that too, right?" I asked as she caught up with me.

"Bella, you're okay," Alice assured me. _He's not bleeding either. You're just overreacting._

"If I'm overreacting, why are you here?" I shot back.

"English got boring," She answered cheerfully. "So I took a bathroom break."

"Oh, you are so funny, Alice," I said sarcastically. But after feeling the tenor of her thoughts, I knew exactly why she had come out here. Though I was being hostile, I couldn't help but feel gratitude at the same time.

"Are we calm now?" She asked, with a hand on my arm.

"We're calm," I replied, taking a deep breath and inhaling her strong honey-flavored scent that marginally quelled the burn in my throat.

"Good...Your future seems to be too. Stay calm, Bella," Alice told me, skipping back in the opposite direction while I leaned against the back of the Volvo with one arm extended towards it.

It took a moment to stop the overflow of venom salivating in my mouth. And just as it did, I heard jogging footsteps behind me.

"Hey," Edward greeted. I inhaled and beyond the normal level of fire in my throat, there was nothing. Alice wasn't wrong. He hadn't been bleeding. I overreacted. "You were right."

"I usually am," I said wryly, taking my hand off the car so I didn't look like I was taking a breath after running a few miles. "But what about?"

"Ditching is healthy," He remarked with a smirk.

I turned to face him. "On occasion. You scared me for a minute there."

"How did you see me?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. "I thought you were skipping."

"I was in my car," I nodded towards the Volvo. "Listening to a CD."

His lips twitched like he wanted to say something, but he contained it. Curiosity burned me. My response was normal, wasn't it?

"How's Jessica?" I said, partly to restart the conversation.

"She should be coming out soon," He said, glancing over his shoulder towards the building he had just left. "I'll take her to Gym to watch out for her."

Another puzzle piece fell into place about his personality. While I did feel instantly jealous of his concern for her, it showed how much of a caretaker this guy really was. I was sure he wasn't asked to take her to class and watch for signs of fainting but he was going to anyway...Why? Because he genuinely felt for her? Maybe I assumed wrong about how serious he took the relationship...Or perhaps it was kindness. I didn't know.

"That's good," I said, nodding. "Too bad you didn't get to prick your finger."

Good for me, though. We definitely wouldn't be having this conversation.

"Not a fan of masochism," Edward smiled down at me warmly. I couldn't help but smile back, even though I was still recovering from an internal war. His tone changed. "Hey, Bella...I have a question for you."

"What's that?" I asked, instantly on my guard.

"Are you going? This Saturday, I mean," He sounded hopeful.

I had heard this within the minds of several students in our grade today. It was a group outing to the beach. There wasn't a chance I would be avoiding sunlight if I went.

"Where are you all going anyway?" I asked.

"To La Push. The First Beach," He clarified.

Definitely not, then. I needed to hunt anyway. There was never doing too much of that nowadays.

"I wasn't invited," I said with a wry smile.

"I'm inviting you," He said in a final tone, as if that should be enough.

"I don't want to push your girlfriend off the edge, Edward," Even though that sounded really appealing. There was plenty of high cliffs on the Reservation. "We don't want her to snap."

He gave a shrug of his shoulders, saying dismissively. "You're my friend, now, aren't you? I can invite my friend."

"Another time, maybe," Not on that beach for sure.

"I'll hold you to it," He told me with a glint in his eye that said he definitely would. "You going back to last period or you ditching some more?"

I couldn't help but laugh when he asked the last question as if he was someone in on a big secret. "Probably ditching some more."

"Oh, well...," His face fell slightly. I wondered why. "Well, if you're going home...I'll see you Monday, right?"

Maybe. The clouds were clearing up and Alice predicted there might be some sunshine. If so, that was a no. But I lifted my shoulders into a shrug to mimic his movement. "Maybe. We'll see. Have fun at the beach."

"Oh, and since you're not coming to the beach...You owe me. Just saying," He said, starting to walk backwards now. He gave me a charming wink that would have made me blush if it were possible. "I'll see you, Bella."

"Goodbye, Edward," I answered softly, watching him jog back to the school with a wistful smile.


	7. Ghost

**A/N: First off, I wanna thank everyone for the generous reviews. They really mean a lot and I'm glad to know people enjoy the story so far. I'm trying to stray a little from going line by line on the conversations to give them their own type of chemistry. A lot of people like role reversals only for the humor. **

**As I always looked at Bella, she was kind of a damsel. I'm trying not to do that with Edward Swan. And I hope I'm doing well. Again, I appreciate the support on this. You're the reason I keep going.**

* * *

><p>When the rest of us went home, I called the attention of one of my siblings in particular. Rosalie. She was on her way to the garage to shove herself under the BMW. I could tell she was angry with me. She had smelled Edward's scent all over me in the front seat and wasn't too happy. Like the others, she didn't see the fuss over Edward Swan. He didn't look nor seem remotely appealing to her. I was slightly angry at how she viewed him...<p>

"Let's get an early start on the hunt tomorrow," I suggested, standing in the doorway of the garage.

She emerged from the front of the car, on her back, with a sour expression. "And why is that?"

Unlike my other siblings, Rosalie didn't like the silent conversation bit. She knew I heard her thoughts and could easily speak to her through them with everyone else getting one side of the conversation from my perspective...but it was bad enough, to her, that I could hear her in the first place.

"Just you and me," I replied, shirking from answering the direct question.

She stood up in a flash of movement, blurring in the air and stopping right in front of me. "Why?"

I looked back in her eyes, unblinkingly serious. "We need to talk."

She set down a wrench with a loud clatter on her workbench. "Fine, then."

We entered the main room together. Rosalie darted for the stairs without looking back at me.

_I need to change._ Was her thought.

"It isn't a cocktail party," I muttered under my breath.

Esme was folding clothes upstairs herself. When Rosalie passed her on the way to her room, she shot her retreating back a bewildered look before descending the stairs. Alice was helping Jasper win at chess by mouthing Emmett's next moves over his shoulder.

_What's going on?_ Esme directed at me.

"Early start on hunting," I said.

"Who's hunting?" Emmett asked, turning around. Alice stopped moving her lips at once and began to hum innocently. Emmett was none the wiser.

"Myself...," I started slowly as Rosalie walked down from behind Esme with a navy blue tracksuit on. "and your wife."

Emmett's eyes widened. "You're going on a hunting trip? Just you two? Maybe I should..." ._..Referee...?_ "."...tag along."

"We'll be fine," I assured both Emmett and Esme. Esme was looking worried, Emmett, skeptical. "Seriously."

_Oh, dear. Try not to fight eachother, Bella._

"How rude. As if I have nothing better to do than to fight my sister," I responded sarcastically approaching her. She took my face in between her hands and kissed my forehead, giving me a reproving look.

"No fighting," She said out loud.

"Don't worry," I said again.

* * *

><p>It was Sunday by the time we reached one of the last hunting spots. I knew Rosalie was expecting me to talk, but it was hard to do when she kept throwing herself out of my range and hunting elsewhere, far off the mark.<p>

For the past two days she did this. Only returning when she was done with her share, asking if I was done with mine so we could move on to another spot. It was annoying, considering it was Rosalie and the tension was thick. Any of my other siblings, I'd have chased to the ends of the earth on a hunt. With Rosalie, probably not.

I realized why when we were nearer the Canadian border and she separated again from my trail, towards a streaming river where she and I had caught the scent of a deer drinking from the water. I sighed. There was nothing else within my range, so I followed her.

Rosalie was so prim when she fed, it wasn't even funny. Not a stain on her. My own shirt looked like I had bought the same version of the previous one just in red print. I wasn't usually so messy...My mind was elsewhere and I really didn't give a damn for bloody clothing when I was sure Alice would buy me a new wardrobe at some point in the future.

"Done?" I asked Rosalie as she rose to her feet and wiped little traces of blood from her lips.

She faced me. "Yeah. Did you want some? I think there's some left."

I felt sloshy. "No."

"Oh," She answered awkwardly then began to march off towards the trees. "Well then. I'll go find something more appealing."

I flitted towards her before she could see me coming, unless she was looking, which she wasn't. My arm wrapped around her neck and threw her down, flat on her back. My eyes shifted crimson very briefly before returning to normal.

"All right, Rose. No more games," I snarled from above, retracting my arm and curling my fingers lightly around her throat. "I said we needed to talk. So don't make this difficult for me. Now what I wanted to tell you was-"

But what I wanted to tell Rosalie, she didn't deign to hear. Instead she broke out of my hold in a flash and shoved my chest with all the strength behind both her hands. I felt us both flying through the air with her weight on top of mine. We collided painfully, with me underneath on the other side of the river bank.

"You were saying?" She asked, smug.

I reached over her shoulder and took a handful of her shirt from the back. Propelling my leg to kick, I backflipped us both and released in mid air. She hit the ground again, but I was standing, my foot pressed into her shoulder.

"I said, no games," I told her fiercely. The smugness died out of her eyes and fury replaced them. I knew her attack had been playful but only in part. She felt delight in being able to overpower me. "What is your problem, Rosalie? You can't even hear me out?"

_Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's Maybelline. Easy, breezy, beautiful CoverGirl. Danielle's Beauty Salon- Where style is created. Glow. Real Health. Real Beauty._

My eyebrows shot up at the suddenly overwhelming power of her beauty ads being shoved in my face. Deliberately.

"What are we hiding?" I questioned over the stream of some airbrushed celebrity advertising for Pantene Pro-V. She gritted her teeth and let something loose that I wasn't supposed to see. The blatant feeling itself behind the thought.

Envy. Ah, with Rosalie, it was all about herself.

I removed my foot from her shoulder and she shot up to her feet behind me, so I was staring at a patch on the ground.

_You say anything, and I will hunt you down like the rogue you are._ Rosalie spat mentally.

"I really wonder...," I began.

"Don't start,"

My eyebrow shot up and I ignored her warning. "I really wonder what you'd be like if you didn't have your looks."

She grounded her teeth together and I closed my eyes. It was depressing to think about Rosalie, which is why I didn't, unless I had to.

"It's not even about that," She scowled.

I turned around on my heel. "Really? Do tell."

She stepped closer to me, her words almost just wisps in the wind. "Just how do you think this will end, Bella? Do you actually think that human-"

My fingers twitched. "Don't call him 'that human.' He has a name. Humans don't exist to be considered lower than us when we're the ones trying to accommodate them."

"Accommodate_ them? THEM_?" She snarled dangerously. "Bella, we accommodate ourselves before we yield to any human!"

"What are we, royalty? We're not even alive!" I retorted.

"Wow," She crossed her arms. "Is this your way of evading the question? You know this can't happen, right Bella ?"

I saw the direction of her thoughts and it made me cringe. "Not now, Rose."

"No, now. Since you insisted," Rosalie growled, drawing even closer and baring down on me. "Just how do you intend to make this work? You're a vampire, Bella. An immortal. You will continue looking exactly as you are while he ages, grows older, smarter and then begins to deteriorate. And aside from the fact that you'll be the one changing his diapers maybe one day...He's going to want to settle down-"

"Rosalie-"

"-have a wife." Her sapphire eyes brightened. " have...children.."

Agony was going to pull the cord on my carefully placed mask. I knew my expression was starting to shatter. "Please, don't say it."

She looked close to crying herself. "...and you can't provide that."

I inhaled sharply and felt my breath come out cracked. My eyes were stinging, trying to form tears they could no longer produce.

Rosalie's palm shaped to my cheek and she forced me to look at her. "I know you've always put up a brave face...but you knew from the very beginning, how this was going to end. You don't wanna change him..."

"No,"

"And you don't want to kill him either,"

"No,"

"Eternity is a long time, Bella," said Rose. "A very long time. To wallow...to hold on to our emotions. We are forever in these bodies. But I think our minds age with time."

"Get to the point, Rosalie," I snapped.

"I'm saying...," She dropped her hand. "Nothing. I don't think you wanna hear it."

She blocked the thought with more ad slogans going off in her head. I gave a shrug of my shoulders. I wasn't going to force it out of her. Though, I knew what she was getting at. I ran my fingers through my hair.

"I know what you mean, Rosalie," I said more to stop her mental babble. "That you think it's going to end one way or another. I don't think so. I wish I could make it true too. His blood still sings to me like no other I have ever met. I can't change that unless I do either of those things...But...I have to try not to let either of those things happen. I know Alice believes it will happen, in due time...But I don't want it too. For my sake, and for his. I'm not..."

"Not what?" She asked, breaking out of the tirade.

" I'm not going to take his life," I said, my eyes blazing. "I'm not...I love him. I love him as much as you love Emmett."

She stared at me for a long time. I could tell her argument was over. Her vanity and envy hadn't quite died either. But she was thinking my response seemed...right, somehow. Like it fit accordingly to what she was saying. She thought my love was false and slightly untrue, though, which made me clench my jaw. Yet, I could tell there would be no verbal war between us anymore. She had said some of her views on the matter. I respected her enough to let her think I felt the conversation resolved like she wanted me to.

"I'll take you up on proving you wrong,"She said with a malicious glint in her eye that looked quite like a challenge. She took a hunter's crouch and sped off into the trees with me on her heels.

* * *

><p>It was midnight on Monday-or technically- Tuesday when we returned. Rosalie's tracksuit looked slightly withered and I had already heard her internally consider buying a brand new one in pink. So I didn't feel too bad. Emmett was wide-eyed to see that both of us were in one piece. He rushed over to Rosalie to give her her welcome-home present.<p>

I slid out of my leather jacket and approached the kitchen where Esme was sewing something alone at the kitchen table. She heard me come in, I knew. There was a slight smile on her face.

"Hello, darling," She greeted without looking up from her needle and white material.

"Hello," I answered, skipping over to give her a kiss on the cheek. "Is Carlisle working late?"

"He is. There was an emergency," She stated, looking up when I didn't respond. "Not anyone you know, darling. ..Just a girls' misfortune in Port Angeles."

I scanned her mind vaguely to get a glimpse of what she was taking about. She had only imagined this scene through Carlisle's explanation over the phone. A girl in a very near mutilated state, beaten and scarred in various places. I flinched mentally.

"That's awful," I muttered.

"I know," She agreed. We were silent for a long moment while I hoped she was right and it was not someone I knew. I was grateful for that much at least. I wouldn't wish such a thing on anyone. Even Jessica who had gotten on my last nerve lately.

"Edward called," Esme said abruptly, and I jumped at the mention of his name. A rare thing to occur at all in an immortal.

"Did he?" I asked, trying to sound casual and failing miserably. "How did he get the house number?"

"I wondered that myself," She responded. "but I assume he simply looked it up."

I would have to give him my cell number at some point in the future. While I was glad it was Esme of all who picked up, I shuddered to think what would happen if Emmett was the one to receive the call. He'd probably find it hilarious to pretend I didn't live here.

"Did he say what he wanted?" I asked.

"To know if you wanted to go with him on a double date tomorrow night," She was smiling in a way that made me feel uncomfortable. Like I had just won grand prize in a contest. "He said you owed him. And that you'd understand. He left a number."

She nodded towards the kitchen counter near the phone where I saw a pink sticky note. "He said to text him 'yes' or 'no'."

I started to smile. "Well, if I owe him. No doesn't seem to be an option, does it?"

Esme beamed. "No, I don't think you have a choice. Have fun, dear."

"Thank you, Mommy," I said, swooping down to kiss her cheek again while I flitted towards the sticky note and pulled it off.

Still looking at it, I made my way out of the kitchen, and up to my room, passing my siblings along the way. Alice had decided to wash brand new clothing to give it a unique scent and the house was noisy and smelling strongly of "ocean mist". Jasper was on the couch, chattering away on his own cell with Peter and Charlotte, two good friends of his. While Emmett and Rosalie remained in the garage, giving my Volvo a tune up.

When I resided in the privacy of my own room, I took my cell phone off the shelf and turned it on. While waiting for the load up screen to disappear, I thought of Edward. A double date..

Not a regular one? He was still with that woman. I assumed out of courtesy...Why me though? Why couldn't they have one by themselves? It could have been that the tension between them was taking a new high and he wanted company in the fall.

I was cheered by the idea, my mind taking a new fantasy of comforting a forlorn Edward through his mild heartbreak.

Of course that meant my date was Mike. I'm sure he was happy with that. I just hoped I didn't have to touch him.

I texted the number.

**This is Bella. With a Yes.**

I stood up and impatiently waited for a response. Maybe I had texted the wrong number? I checked the now scrunched-up sticky note. The number was exactly correct. Was I reading Esme's writing wrong? Did she write the wrong number? It was late...he was probably in bed. He didn't seem the nighttime owl type.

Ten minutes later, my phone beeped.

**Okay, Bella With a Yes. Does that mean you're coming tomorrow night?**

"Ha ha," I whispered in response to his joke. He was awake. I guess he was a night time owl. Or maybe I woke him up.

Such a gentleman to remain articulate.

I texted back at super speed.

**It's Bella with a yes to tomorrow night. Better? Where to, darling?**

I don't know if he'd find the nickname offensive. I couldn't help myself with him sometimes.

Three minutes passed.

**La Bella Italia. Its in Port Angeles. I can pick you up if you want.**

_With that truck? I thought I told you you'd be killing it with long distances..._ I wanted to respond.

I figured he was already picking up Jessica though, and I doubt she would have been happy if he had me in the car with equal treatment as her. I didn't want to ride with Mike either. I knew that was coming.

**I'll meet you there. I know where it is. What time?**

I set the record straight now. He wouldn't have room to argue.

**7:00 sharp. Don't be late, sweetheart.**

Oh, good. He wasn't arguing. I wished I could blush at his little nickname. I smiled faintly instead while my fingers were busy texting back.

**I'm never late, honey. I'll see you then.**


	8. Port Angeles

When it was five o'clock, I was preparing for the little double date I was invited to. Rosalie did my makeup. She was so used to seeing me wear everything black, nearly every bit of makeup she did for me came out black. My prominent brown eyes stood out more than usual. My cheeks were pinched with a rosy red that we tried to make look natural. I decided to don on the same little black dress I had worn the first time I had encountered Edward. Alice let me borrow her black pumps.

Rosalie had done my hair up in a clip, letting a parting slip to let two curled locks of my hair shape my heart-shaped face.  
>The thing Esme had been sewing was a new white scarf for me. As I stood, staring at my reflection in Rosalie's full-length mirror, she brought it out to drape around my arms where I caught it and let it slide down around my elbows.<p>

"It's beautiful," I told her.

"Just like you," She said proudly, planting a kiss on my cheek while I faced the ground. "What's wrong?"

"Do you think I should go?" I asked her. "Do you think...I have control?"

The truth was, I was having second thoughts. I had paced my room with my phone on all day, thinking of whether I should cancel. I couldn't go to school naturally, because the sun was preventing that. But now I wasn't so sure. What if I lost it? I hadn't so far, and that was remarkable, I knew...but still. I enjoyed every moment spent with Edward, whether it was in the presence of Jessica or Mike was irrelevant.

Was that enough?

"Stop doubting yourself, Bella. You are much stronger than you give yourself credit for," Esme said. I just didn't want to come home covered in blood, as was the risk for everyday.

"Thanks, Mom," I said appreciatively, not quite taking in the reassurance she was offering. I'd go though. Only for Edward. I wanted to see him. He was the only source of comfort in my life right now, whether he knew it or not.

It was dark by the time I was in Port Angeles, yet I was still early. It was only six thirty. But the sun was finally down and I was only too eager to get out of the cramped household. Not that I didn't find the company of my family fulfilling, it was another thing to be out and about, even if I was pretending to be something I was far from.

I took my Volvo. It felt like it was gliding with the recent tune-up Rosalie and Emmett had given it. I had to thank her for that later. My thoughts were, as always now, conflicted on the coming hours. But I pushed the negativity aside. Tonight would be special. Perhaps I would speak to Edward about the thing I had been feeling for too long, it felt. I wondered how he would react to that. He was such a gentleman...I imagined he would initially be displeased.

Maybe he wouldn't take me seriously. I was so frequently humorous with him. Which was saying something. Time sharpens caution and destroys playfulness. With him, it felt so easy to step into an almost different world. His scent prevented me from altering altogether...of course, so was my bodily reaction to it. But I said things, I did things I would never have thought of doing before. It was because I loved him that I wanted to see him happy. To see him smile and laugh.

So maybe he would find the idea of my love to be ridiculous. I tried not to let hurt show on my face as I cruised down easily through the sprawl of cars. I was so good at hiding my emotions...If he laughed, maybe I would laugh with him.

Was this even a good time to admit love for anyone? What about Jessica?

_Oh, who cares about her?_ Was my immediate thought.

Certainly not I.

I stopped at a red light in between two apartment complexes.

_Ripe. Ripe. Ripe. Brian really knew how to pick em' tonight._

_She looks fresh out of high school...Maybe Middle School, actually._

I paused, curiously to pluck the mind of these men. There was four of them, I noted and all eight of their eyes were set on a young Asian girl with long silky black hair and a Catholic School girl uniform. She looked frightened, hugging her books to her chest as tight as possible as she tried to find a way through the fidgety circle created around her.

"Please, just let me go," She was saying.

"Aw, don't be like that, honey," One asked. I assumed this was Brian. He had a trucker cap on and shoulder length blonde hair with a mustache. I delved further into his mind and found his evaluation of the girl to be disturbing. This wasn't his first time, and she wasn't his first with the unwilling.

Well, I wasn't going to stand for it. I almost crushed the steering wheel into dust as I swerved my car around and headed in through the apartment gates at lightning speed. Even so, the girl's timid voice shimmered like a bell as she spoke.

"I-I took the train. I always take the train," She was saying.

"Oh yeah, I saw you on there. You was as cute as a button, weren't you buttercup?" One of the other ones cooed, a construction worker dressed bulk of a man in his forty's with curly hair.

All the thoughts of tonight swept from my mind. For the first time in over a hundred years, I felt like what I was. I was a vampire. And there would be blood tonight. I was never so arrogant as to try to stop every injustice in the world. I wasn't a superhero. But taking advantage of the weak, the fragile earned the lowest spot in my book. I slid on sunglasses to shield the murderous red that had replaced my warm brown. I stopped the car just outside of the alley. The men were closing in now. One behind her everywhere she turned, hoping to pin her down. A snarl ripped through my chest.

I opened my door with deliberate loudness, making it creak. They didn't hear, but they did hear the car-door slam. Five heads turned in my direction as I wrapped the white scarf more securely around my elbows and began walking towards them. I appeared to be at ease, even though inside I was burning.

Their attentions were successfully averted.

_Wow. Just wow. Look at that body. That waist is tiny._

The fantasies of the young girl were replaced by ones of me. But they couldn't have the girl run away. Now, I was combined with her. I slid my eyes downward to give off the impression that I was scared or very paranoid trying to get to the other side.

A chicky on the wrong side of the road.

"Hey baby," Brian said. "What're you doing out here all by your lonesome? Lost or somethin'?

"I'm just out for a walk," I answered, adding a high note to my voice to appear scared. "What're you guys up to?"

They exchanged smirks. "What's your name?" Brian asked. I see one of the men shift towards the little girl as if to make sure she didn't make a break for it, even though they were distracted by me.

"Bella. What's yours?"

"Brian," He grinned. "Hey, Bella. You're one beautiful woman. You know that? And I appreciate real beauty when I see it."

"I bet you do, Brian. Do you appreciate real _danger_ when you see it too?"

They all laughed. They thought I was amusing. Brian slapped his knee as he stepped closer to me. "Are you saying you're dangerous, Bella? You look like you're going out to a party, baby. It just so happens we're going to a party right now. It's going to be hot. You wanna come with us?"

I pretended to consider this. I looked dead at the girl. She was my primary concern. I nodded towards her. "Are you four going to be coming to this party? I don't do well with other girls. Lose the squirt and I might come along."

He laughed at me, then, intrigued. I could tell I was enough to satisfy big Brian. He followed my gaze to the girl. "Beat it, kid."

"Brian-" One of them complained. I'm guessing the one that singled this poor child out.

"Scram!" Brian barked. The girl gave a squeak and was off, her round black eyes on me. I could still hear the terror in her thoughts. But I knew I sensed caution too. She wouldn't be riding the train any time soon. It was carpool only from now on. That was good.

I could tell she felt bad for me. She thought I was going to get what she was meant to receive. She wasn't going to speak of this and with fresh relief she thought of her parents, watching only news on special channels that centered around topics in Eastern Asia.

That gave me a bit of valuable information too. She wouldn't find out what happened here. And if she did, I was sure Alice would warn me of anything big. Speaking of Alice, my sister was calling. I knew it was her...Who else could it be? My phone kept vibrating in the small slit of a pocket in my dress.

Brian noticed. "What's that, honey? Your boyfriend?"

"No one in particular," I hoped the vision she had was violent.

Brian drew closer to me. I could smell stale cigarette and beer on his breath. "What do you say we keep it light on the company, honey? Just me and you. If that's all you need..."

I caught his gaze behind gold-plated sun-glasses. "No."

Brian blinked rapidly in shock. My gaze had been known to burn mortal pupils when I gave it free reign. I held myself in check with him though.

"You don't want to go around sayin' no to me, honey. I don't like that word," said Brian, recovering. His buddies drew closer to me. The space between us all was palpable as was the stench of drunken stupidity. He breathed down my neck and I felt an acute sense similar to nausea. "You ain't from around here, are you precious? Around here, there's two ways to party. You either do it with a smile on your face or you do it screaming. You know what I mean, Bella?"

I smiled, finally. "Are you going to rape me, Brian?"

"It's up to you honeysuckle," He shrugged with a grin. He had me against the wall now. He plastered a hand against the bricks, trapping one side of me. I could smell gun powder. Brian had a gun. Haha.

This was going to be fun.

I moved too fast for him to see, shoving my palm into his jaw with the force of a metal rod. He flew backwards and I knew I broke his jaw.

I was on top of him in an instant, my fingers linked around the collars of his jacket, my teeth bared. His anger showed, his cheeks darkened with blood but I could see awe behind his eyes.

"What are you?" He gasped.

"I'm a party girl," I lost my smile. "Do you have any final requests, gentlemen? No? None? Too bad. Give the devil my regard. I'll be there soon."

My words were a poor joke to torment a victim I cared nothing for. Yet there was truth behind them. I pulled Brian by his shoulders to my lips, crushing his throat to my teeth.

The first taste was Death.

Death, because it was beautiful. Human blood, no matter what wretch it belonged to, was a hundred times more potent than the animal. I could feel the vibrancy of this worthless mortal's life flowing into me, strengthening me, fueling my bloodlust. This is what it meant to be a predator again. I thought I would never forget, but all the motions felt new to me like my filthy past never existed.

My eyes were closed. Images began to dance around me. My own subconscious mind, willing me to stop. But I did not listen. I had spent too long listening to it. If it wasn't too late before...it was too late now.

The seconds ticked by. They always did. The power of an entire sun cannot stop them even for a moment. So death comes between them like a thief of light in the dark. Brian screamed and flailed my arms. But before his sound reached far, I clamped my hand over his mouth and continued my meal.

I heard the shuffle of feet from his partners and unwillingly I pulled away from the whimpering soul.

"No one moves," I said in a voice as dark as my long life.

I drained Brian completely and stood up, wiping my mouth of the dry parts. He was dead, I could tell that much. The rest, soon on the way. They ran for it while I took my time, standing, wiping my sunglasses on my scarf.

I thought of Edward. My love. My sorrow.

My perfectly constructed immortal mind should have been considering the consequences...But I had no care for that, right now. So many moments I was close to killing Edward, I realized what stopped me. He had never deserved such a fate and nor would he ever.

And this was different.

That's what I told myself as I looked at the crimson eyed vampire staring back at me through the reflection of my shades. Hahaha...Life was absurd.

"Dull-eared humans. I said no one moves," The words escaped in a song from my lips and I stalked after the remaining prey.

* * *

><p>Ten minutes later, I was standing off the edge of the harbor, dragging the last of the degenerate bodies into the water where he sunk with the rest of them. I was confident the bodies wouldn't be found for some time. I had filled their jackets, their pockets with rocks and tied larger ones to their feet and wrists.<p>

There was no evidence of blood shed. I made sure to clear that up. Even the traces on me were gone. All consumed in my own body which felt like it was on fire, radiating waves of strength and power. There was no one near me, and yet I could hear the teeming thoughts of everyone within nearly fifty miles of me.

My eyes were shaded a bright crimson. The true mark of what we were. The true mark of a predator. That was fine. I didn't think about the consequences fully yet, but that didn't mean I didn't _know _them. There was no living in Forks after this.

I was always inherently selfish. Rosalie had stated it before. There was no denying it. Perhaps Alice would stop me, if she saw this. I took out my phone, it was better to say I wasn't coming home now then never.

But what I saw there shocked me. The missed calls were not Alice. But Edward. Perhaps she hadn't seen what transpired at all. It had happened before when we accidentally played with the holes in her vision at a moment of indecision. She didn't catch certain things. Small usually, but it happened. There was a moment of indecision in me tonight that lasted a fraction of a second before I killed Brian and the gang. And it was that, that probably prevented Alice's sight.

That was good. Then no one would stop me from doing this.

I dialed Edward's number. One the first ring, he picked up. "Bella? Where are you?"

His voice was panicked and slightly on edge. I wondered why. A normal person would ask me if I got lost. But then I remembered I told him I knew where it was. No chance of using that. I pulled the phone away briefly to check how late I was. 6:58. Ouch. Girls were usually punctual.

" I have to cancel," I said. My voice was draped in ice. "I can't make it."

There was a long, tense silence between us. His voice equaled the awkwardness. "Why?"

_Because, I love you too much to let you see me like this._ "Something came up."

"Are you with another guy?" He asked, matching my cold tone.

I wanted to laugh, it'd shake some of the tension off for sure.

"Something like that," I said back, no laugh.

"Will you come anyway? I'm sorry. I need to see you tonight," He sounded like he was teetering. I wonder what he wanted to speak about so desperately. "I can call them off...Just you and me."

I could pull off one conversation without showing him what I had become. Better hold on to the sunglasses. What about my control? This is where I would need Alice. With a pang, I shuddered. Maybe not.

I'd have to trust myself. I wanted to be near him right now anyway. Anything to prove that the monstrous world I had reentered wasn't real.

"Don't call them off," I said. I wanted him to have someone to go back to, even if it wasn't me. Jessica had convinced herself that Edward and her were an item and he had done very little to nothing to dispel it. I wasn't going to stop him now. I wasn't going to hope for him now. I wanted him so badly it hurt. But my decisions tonight had changed where we stood forever.

"Okay...Are you on your way?" He asked, pulling me out of my depressing train of thought.

"I'll be there soon,"I promised, closing my phone. I pressed it to my lips.

My love. My soul.

I continued to watch the still waters for a long moment. I was an immortal. This would always be true. I was a creature of the night, despite the fact that we showed ourselves under the cover of rain clouds in the day. I was an undead...Though right now, every fiber of my body was tingling. It wouldn't wear off for some time, I knew that.

I slid into the Volvo and drove away from the harbor. My murderous act would be left far behind me physically. Mentally, was a different story altogether.

* * *

><p>When I pulled into the La Bella Italia, it was 7:10. The lights from the restaurant gave off an eerie light that seemed unreal to me. It was a pull to a fantasy land where there was no such thing as vampires or blood-drinkers.<p>

I pulled on my sunglasses as well. Let's see how that one lasted. I could still feel a haze of burning red behind my eyelids...but I'd do my best to keep it concealed. I draped Esme's scarf around my neck and climbed out of the car. The breeze felt cooler than usual on my frozen immortal body. Or perhaps it was just what I had fed on that had made my senses more attuned even to the weather.

This wasn't a good thing, though. I convinced myself of that when I entered the well-lit restaurant.

A young host approached me with dirty blonde hair. He appraised my dress, my long legs appreciatively. _She looks like a movie star.  
><em>

"Private parlor, miss?" He asked with a heavy Italian accent that didn't match the tenor of his thoughts. Faker. The private parlors were over to the right near where the soft music was playing and a few couples were up and dancing.

I smiled at him, teeth gleaming. "Actually, I was here meeting friends on a date. Table of three over..."

I could see the back of Jessica's head. She was brave to wear a pink dress that was so low-cut on the back. Mike was across from her...but no sign of Edward?

"She's with us," A firm voice said from behind me. I looked over my shoulder, keeping my smile in place as Edward stepped next to me. His scent intoxicated me. The burn in my throat was ten times stronger than it ever had been. It was all I could do from licking my lips in satisfaction of a "meal to come".

He was wearing a tuxedo and he looked gorgeous. I looked at his face then and felt spasms of electricity sear in my back when he touched there, lightly with his finger tips. It felt so good. I wanted to lean into him.

"I'm with them," I echoed.

A faint smile touched Edward's lips as he led me towards the table. The smile faded and I could tell he wasn't going to talk very plainly of what he wanted to. I swerved around others. Jessica and Mike both stood up when they saw us approach.

"I found Bella," Edward said in a tight voice. Mike had the gesture of one wanting to take a ladies hand to kiss it, but I waved him off. Edward took his seat across from me while I lowered into the seat Mike had pulled back for me, next to him.

"I'm so sorry about that," I told the three of them sincerely.

_Sure you are. God, look at what she's wearing. She's pretty but in the freaky way. I don't know what Edward sees in following her around like a lost puppy. Why is she wearing sunglasses indoors? They're sooo weird._

I had neither the patience nor the care for Jessica's thoughts after what I had been through tonight. I picked up the menu in front of me and pretended to look through it. "Has everyone all decided what they're getting?"

I sounded like the waitress would sound. I could hear Jessica echo this thought. But they had already decided. I could tell with their menus closed.

"I'm not that hungry," I commented. I was very full, actually. Even with Edward, less than a foot away, breathing that intoxicating scent. "I'll just have a coke."

Was it just me or was Edward smiling? His face was still so tense, but I could see something underneath there. The waiter approached. It was another young man with black hair. He looked like he hated his job. I ached inside sentimentally as he took down our orders, seeming surprised when all I ordered was a drink.

When he whisked away our menus, Jessica rounded on me. "So, Isabella. What happened to make you so late?"

_Did you have a near-death experience? Haha. Wishful thinking._

I could feel my eyes tightening. Her thoughts seemed so much louder now that my senses were more attuned. Her question was so simple...yet I could see she was waiting for a response. Any response that she could retort with.

"I actually had a little car trouble," I lied smoothly.

_Did you almost get run over? Better not get my hopes up._

"Is your car okay?" Mike asked, seeming genuinely concerned.

"Yeah, its fine," I assured him. "It was just having trouble with a new chassis that my brother Emmett installed."

"Your brother fixes cars?" Mike seemed amazed. "He's what? Like seventeen?"

"Eighteen. It runs in the family. My dad taught him everything," I replied conversationally.

"That's so cool," said Mike in awe. Was that really so unheard of?

The waiter returned with our drinks and I found my eyes on Edward, only to find him already watching me. When he caught my eye, his mouth opened a fraction like he was going to speak. His eyebrows furrowed. He looked upset. No, he looked furious. He was watching me intently. He must have been doing it the whole time. I stared back, feeling questions burn behind my sunglasses.

He leaned forward, as always, catching me by surprise. "Bella. Can I speak to you privately?"

This was what I was waiting for. Was it what I was hoping for? Or what I was dreading?

"Of course," I told him, standing. He stood too. He waited for me to walk to his side of the table before we walked towards the entrance, leaving a bewildered Mike and a seething Jessica behind us. I thought Edward was going to lead me outside, but he led me to the other side of the restaurant where the couples were dancing.

"Really...," I muttered hesitantly. "You dance?"

"I play football. Humor me," He said with a smile, offering his hand. I took it, feeling fire race up my deadened veins. It was like his own blood was coursing through me. . I can't think of his blood. I shouldn't...He placed his hand on my waist and pulled me close. I had never felt his scent more prominently then I did then. But for once, the desire for his blood was overshadowed by something else...The desire for him alone. This beautiful man...I wanted every part of him.

I imagined what it would be like kissing him. My lips to his. Cold stone to warm...Yielding silk...

And then he dies.

I cringed a little in the circle of his arms. He felt so strong, so hard. If I couldn't smell him and hear that calm heartbeat, I'd think he was one of my own.

"What brought this on?" I asked.

He seemed distracted, like he was trying to push a wayward thought from his mind. He finally looked down at me as we twirled this way and that. He was leading. I was impressed.

"I had an interesting discussion on the beach on Saturday," He stated.

"Did you have fun?" I asked.

His lips twitched. "It was interesting."

Ugh, difficult boy.

"What was your interesting discussion?" I asked, prying a little bit.

"I spoke to an old family friend. Rebecca Black," said Edward. The name...was not familiar...yet there was something about that last name. Who...?

"Her dad is one of the Quileute elders," Edward clarified.

Quileute...Damn. Damn. So the elders had continued the legacy of their tribe, speaking of us. Aware of us.

If I wasn't so consciously aware of him touching me, clasping my hand, my waist...I might have gone rigid. I knew my eyes were wide behind the sunglasses, unnaturally. Edward didn't seem to notice these things, still swaying us this way and that.

He knew. He knew everything about me.

"We went for a walk," He went on. "She told me some old scary stories. She told me one in particular..."

I knew where this was going. The only mystery was why I was invited to this date. Why he was dancing with me..Why he was still here.

"Go on," I said stiffly.

He stopped dancing to stare down at me hard. I could tell he was trying to meet my gaze through the sunglasses. I tried to look back without flinching...He exhaled and I felt his scent wave around me. Instead of turning redder, my eyes sent vein spasms around my lids and cheek. I could hear the sound it made, like a snake slinking. I cringed out of Edward's arms, breaking his hold on me and covering myself quickly with my scarf.

"Bella?" He said, closer then I expected. I took a step back.

"I have to go," I muttered, almost too low for him to catch. I didn't care anymore.

I darted for the door. He knew everything. I had to get out of here. The family was better off leaving too. I'd warn them about it. Maybe we'd split. They'd never forgive me for this.

I could hear, feel, smell him behind me. I was faster though. I was already outside when he caught my elbow rather hard in that grip. I spun around only to be caught in his chest where the smell of him was thrust at full force to all of my sharpened, yet off-guard senses.

He lowered his head to my level, his mouth just barely grazing my ear. He whispered. "I smell **blood**."

Shock froze me for half a second. My breathing accelerated. I wrenched out of his grip. He caught my wrist, faster then I would have expected, his eyebrows as high as they could go.

"What are you so afraid of?" He asked forcefully, grabbing my elbows with both hands to steady me. Then he reached up to take my face and I cringed again. His hands were gentle on my face, like being touched by two hot pads. He pinched the bridge of my glasses between his fingers and pulled them off.

I looked. I had to look at his face.

I saw him gasp in shock before my eyes closed over the red. He let me go. I could have screamed. I broke away from him and made for the car when he started chasing me again. As soon as I reached the Volvo, he had put his whole body weight against me so we were against the side of the trunk. God, he felt so warm.

"What are you?" He demanded, spinning me around by the shoulders. I let him. I felt light-headed and limp. Was that normal? I was still breathing hard, meeting his hardened gaze.

My scarlet eyes were blazing as I looked back at him. His grip was hard on my shoulders."But, you already know...Don't you?"

He closed his eyes and locked his jaw, his mouth turning thinner. "It's not possible."

"Isn't it? You've connected the dots," What more was there to lose now? " You've seen it...And you can look at me...and see what you never thought was real. You're touching it now. Isn't that worth believing?"

"Bella...," He pleaded.

"I didn't want to hurt you," It was hard to remain level. "I wanted to keep you safe. I warned you."

He shook his head again, stubborn while his mouth became one straight line at this memory. He didn't want to look at me. I felt so ashamed. "You know why. It's _dangerous_."

"_IT'S NOT!_" He roared, striking out. I actually cringed from the blow before I heard glass shattering next to me. My eyes flew open to see his fist inside of my car. Edward pulled it out. Blood surrounded fresh wounds on his knuckles. If I thought the burn in my throat was anything before, it was pure fire I was breathing in and out. It came out cracked and broken while I worked with the weight of the world to stop from ripping him apart right there and then.

No. No. Not him. Not him.

He was breathing hard too, calming himself down. I closed my eyes again and tried to concentrate on holding my breath. Wasn't working.

This was it. All my years of control down the tube. I loved Edward more than anything and I was going to kill him. I started opening my eyes when he brought his uninjured hand to cup my chin.

He seemed to read the direction of my thoughts. His voice was gentle."You never let me finish in there."

He caught me by surprise again. That was good. It took a slight edge of wanting to give into primal instinct right there. I tried to manage a weak smile through my sharp exhales. "What's that?"

Edward shook his head. "It doesn't matter to me what you are."

"It doesn't _matter?_" I said through my teeth.

"No," He shook his head firmly, empty of the anger I had seen before. He was sincere. "It doesn't matter to me."

I searched those emerald eyes for a long time, knowing I was questioning his sanity on the outside. But a bubble of hope began to form. I wanted to squash it...but I couldn't.

I knew my voice came out shaky. "You don't...You don't care if I'm not human?"

"No," Edward answered softly. He was no longer angry. He started to lean down towards me...He was coming much too close. Way beyond my control now. His lips were so close...No, I couldn't let him...but why wasn't I making a move to stop him?

"Edward?"Jessica's shrill voice suddenly shrieked. I turned away shame faced as Edward dropped his hands from my shoulders, surprised. She marched over to us with a confused Mike on her heels.

_WHAT DID SHE DO TO HIM? I WILL KILL HER._

My sunglasses were long forgotten near the entrance of the restaurant. Damn.

"What is going on, Edward?" She had definitely seen the _almost_ kiss. She threw her pink purse down indignantly. "Just...Just what!"

Edward opening his mouth and spun around to face her. He seemed to be at a loss of words. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw him raise his hands in surrender then drop them in defeat.

"Are you breaking up with me?" She said, her voice cracking her lower lip quivering. Her eyes were on me, but I didn't look her way. _For this SKANK? _

"I'm sorry, Jessica," was all Edward said.

Jessica stared at him, wide eyed for a long time before she let out another shrill scream while tears poured out of her eyes. Mike took her shoulders.

"Come on, Jess. I'll take you home," He was saying soothingly. I appreciated him for this. More then he'd ever know. She was still spewing venomous thoughts as Mike led her away. I almost felt bad for her. Almost.

Edward awkwardly turned towards me. "I guess that calls dinner off."

"I ate already," I said with a casual raise of my eyebrows. I was still tense. He was still bleeding. I glanced down at his injured hand.

"Oh...Right. I'll go cover that up," He said, pulling his sleeve over it and shrinking his hand into it. It didn't help. Not with how fiery my senses were right now. "Stay here, all right?"

I waited in the parking lot against my shattered window. Some of his blood had dripped on the pavement and I could still smell it. I walked to the other side and tried to inhale the fresh breeze instead. It helped. A little. Tonight was way too whacked out for me. There was two cars here too. I had to separate from Edward here...Well at least I didn't have to be in a confined car with him, with nothing _but_ his scent.

He came back with a large white napkin around his wrist. I had calmed down enough to tolerate it. He was looking down at me with probing intensity. "Let's take a walk. My dad's not expecting me until ten. Come on."

We had more to talk about...I knew that. It was funny to think I deliberated leaving before. He extended his uninjured hand. I took his offered hand with a small smile. The way he smiled back, deliberately trusting...told me that the past few minutes with Jessica didn't hurt him as much as I'd have believed.


	9. Theory

**A/N: I think I owed it to my readers to have at least one or two chapters in Edward Swan's point of view. If anyone likes it, I might do more than just two. This is to explain a few things and show a bit of what goes on inside our hero's mind. Again, thanks for all the generous reviews. It means a lot.**

* * *

><p><strong>EPOV<strong>

I led her past the restaurant road where all the passing cars prevented any sort of conversation. She was quiet most of that time, lost in thought, I supposed. I wondered what went on in her mind. I felt like my reaction to her frightened her, made her more aware. Even now, she was all too conscious of herself. She didn't touch me even though we were walking inches apart. I had a feeling she caught herself each time from getting too close.

Between her body and mine, the electricity hummed.

When silence came over us, the darkness came in too. It was a lonely street corner with only few cars passing by. I felt oddly protective of her here. To me, she looked oddly vulnerable. More than she ever did in the time I had known her. It was uncharacteristic. I kept the napkin wrapped tightly around my hand so she didn't feel uncomfortable.

"So," Her voice, like always, sounded like a shimmering bell. This girl could have won first place on American Idol, no doubt. If she chose to project her voice in such a way. But she continued, and I let the sound of her beautiful seep into my head. "Are we going to address the giant elephant in the room, or not?"

She had the air of getting the worst over with, and I had to chuckle. "I think you got me back there. I told you, I didn't care."

Bella looked rather alarmed by this. Like she couldn't believe it. "Why don't you go over what happened that day with me again? You said you had your interesting discussion. Did you have it alone?"

I had to smile at her paranoia. "What, you think we had a group story time? I don't think Jessica would be as accommodating as she was tonight if she knew what I knew."

I saw her flinch at the name. She was frowning, not appreciating my attempt at lightness. "And the story it was about...?"

"About...vampires."Did she want me to say it?

I could see her carefully composed mask begin to collapse. A spectacular display of emotion ran through her face. Disbelief, pain, regret and most prominently, anger.

I cut across her path and stood in front of her. "Bella...I told you...It didn't matter. Isn't that enough?"

"Why?" She asked. She looked like she wanted to ask more than just that. I could see the angry set of her eyebrows. She looked beautiful, even in fury.

"Because it doesn't,"

Couldn't she understand that? That she was the focal point of my life ever since I first saw her? Ever since that day, my mind tried to stray away, but my eyes betrayed me. Almost against my will, I followed her every move when she was near. Cafeteria, classroom...None of it mattered. I was drawn to her in more ways than one. Without her, I would have been scattered against Tyler's van and maybe a few remnants on the wet pavement.

"But, I am curious...," I cringed, waiting for her reaction to that. She didn't disappoint. The red in her eyes flared menacingly...and if I was a man afraid, it would be something to be scared of.

She breezed past me, beginning to walk again. It reminded me of the days after the accident when she was the one following me up to the school. I was so frustrated then, unsure of what exactly she wanted from me.

"What are you curious about?" She asked me, clenching her jaw tight.

"How old are you?" I asked.

Her answer was almost automatic. "Seventeen."

"How long have you...been seventeen?"That didn't fit well.

I was relieved to see a smile form. "A while."

"Okay," I was a little happier now that she was answering me. At least there were no more secrets between us. "Don't laugh...but how come you can come out in the daytime?"

"Hehe," She laughed. "That's a myth."

"Burning in the sun?"

"Myth,"

"Sleeping in coffins?"

"Myth,"

When we passed under a street light, I could see her looking up at me with sadness shadowing those eyes. It was bewildering when I saw just how ancient that sadness was. I could definitely buy that this girl was more than seventeen years of age even if I didn't know the other stuff.

" I can't sleep," She admitted.

"At all" I asked incredulously.

"Never," She answered.

She was staring at me with such intensity. I could see this bothered her somehow. Personally, it sounded kind of relieving. To not need rest at all and be at full energy all the time? Most people would like that. Yet, she didn't. I wondered why.

"You haven't asked me the most important question," She said.

Really? What had I missed? "What would that be?"

Her voice was hard. "You're not worried about my diet?"

"Oh...," I racked my brains and remembered Rebecca's story on the beach. She hadn't gone in to full detail, just saying enough to make it a fulfilling story. But I remembered what she had said about the diet in particular. "That."

"Yes, that," said Bella impatiently. "Aren't you concerned if I drink blood or not?"

"Rebecca told me something about that," I told her.

"What did Rebecca say?"

"She said you didn't...hunt people," I said in a calm voice. "She said your family wasn't dangerous because they were only supposed to hunt animals."

Bella seemed bemused. "She said we weren't dangerous?"

"Not exactly," I clarified. "She said you weren't supposed to be dangerous. But the Quileutes don't want you on your land just in case."

I couldn't discern her expression for a long time in the dark. The silence stretched on and on. "So was she right? About you guys not hunting people?"

Her voice was quiet then, even. "The Quileutes have a long memory."

I nodded to myself. So, that confirmed that she wasn't as dangerous as she let on.

"Don't let that make you complacent," She added quickly as if she could read my mind. Which made me shudder. Could she? "They're right to keep their distance. We are still dangerous."

"I don't get it," I admitted.

"We try," She told me slowly. "We're usually very good at what we do...Sometimes we make mistakes. Me, for example, being alone with you out on this street..."

That disarmed me. She was insinuating... "This is a mistake to you?"

She didn't look at me, then, off in some faraway thought. "A very...dangerous one."

How could she say that when she was the one who showed up tonight? How could she say that when she was the one who pushed me out of the way from the van? When she had agreed to come with me tonight, to talk about this. All I wanted to do was know her. To see past all the walls she had put around herself. She was the most beautiful creature I had ever beheld. I don't even think it was because her species difference from mine...I barely knew her, yet there was something about her. The way she walked, the way she held herself...the way she talked.

I grimaced, despite myself. My voice was a blatant command."Tell me more, then."

If this was our last night together...

"What more do you want to know?" I could tell my tone surprised her.

"Tell me why you hunt animals instead of people," I might as well have added 'now.'

"I don't..._want_ to be a monster," She muttered.

That softened me up some. "But animals aren't enough?"

She seemed to be searching for a comparison I might have understood. "I can't be sure, of course, but I'd compare it to living on tofu and soy milk; we call ourselves vegetarians, our little inside joke. It doesn't completely satiate the hunger—or rather ...thirst. But it keeps us strong enough to resist. Most of the time...Sometimes it's more difficult than others."

"Is it very difficult for you now?"

It was her turn to grimace. "Yes."

"Why are your eyes red?" I asked, noting the scarlet gleam in the night. Her eyes were like two glowing rubies.

"Because I've fed," said Bella shortly.

I had seen three shifts in her eye color since I had known Isabella Cullen existed. Brown. Black...and a mere glimpse of red before it changed back, like that first day. Never had I seen it remain dead on. She had been in my presence so many times before, so I knew it wasn't a response to me. Her stature was tense, sure, but this...

"Your eyes have never stayed like this before," I observed out loud.

She expelled a harsh breath and I was overcome with a heady lilac perfume for a second. "Because I fed off human blood tonight."

That made me want to stop in my tracks. Wasn't that against the treaty? "But...the treaty..."

"Believe me, I know," She spoke softly, filled with regret and my remorse kicked in.

"Do you have to leave?" Was this all the time I had with her? Would she leave now forever? What would I be left with but an unreal fantasy that I couldn't even reflect on without wanting to hit myself. She had always been unreal to me.

Bella opened her mouth and closed it. We had stopped walking and she was looking up at me with that ancient sadness behind her eyes, probing intensity burning behind them. I could tell there were many questions for me there...but she didn't voice them, just looked at me for a long moment.

"I don't know," She sounded like she meant it. "It makes me...anxious to be away from you."

I felt like this was one of the few times Bella was being completely honest with me. This moment, this night. She didn't know the future, and neither did I. But I didn't want her to leave.

"It makes me anxious to be away from you too, Bella," I told her in a hard voice. Her eyes widened and I could see the mask of anger form again.

"Ah," She moaned. "This is...wrong."

"Bella," I began.

"You have no idea what you're getting yourself into, Edward...Tonight wasn't my first time ending human lives. I've done it, over the years. I've been telling myself...that it's fine...and that whoever I killed, had it coming...But that doesn't change what I am...," She reached up to take my cheek in her hand and I could feel the icy touch and the thrumming electricity reach a crescendo. Involuntarily, I shuddered. It was a chilly night. When I looked back at her, she was smiling wryly. As if I had proven something right.

"I'm sorry," I said.

"No, I'm sorry too," Her tone made me feel like she was apologizing for more than just tonight. She turned back to the path we had just walked from. "We should head back."

I sighed and began to follow her path. I slid off my coat and slipped it around her shoulders. She didn't flinch, but I could see her muscles tense just a little.

"Can I ask you something now, Edward?" She asked hestiantly.

"Sure," I answered.

"Jessica?" She left it at that. I chuckled, appreciating her attempt at lightness now.

It was only natural she would ask about her. I had been asked before by my father. He wasn't particularly against my 'relationship' with Jessica, but he, like me, was aware that the other girl's affection was not for me but for what status I had in the school. I indulged her desire because I was never one to deny a ladys' advances. I had had little high school relationships before even in Phoenix, but none of them were serious. I think I just hated the idea of being alone.

It took me a minute to answer. "You predicted it well before. It wasn't serious."

"She certainly didn't seem to agree," Bella noted. "I know her mind...and it wasn't hard to guess how she viewed it and how you..."

Maybe. I was curious as to why she trailed off like that. "I mean...I think she'll get over it. Sides' Mike's always had a crush on her."

He also had a crush on Bella, if she was oblivious to that. That made me want to punch something when I recollected Mike's personal description of Bella's body.

"Well," said Bella. "Isn't that convenient?"

"When you say you 'know her mind'...Do you mean you can...?" I trailed off now, hoping she'd finish it for me.

"Read minds," She said evenly. "Yes, I can...But not yours."

"Not mine?" I repeated, shocked.

"No," She sounded frustrated.

"That's...that's really something. Doesn't it become overwhelming?"

She smiled somewhat, and I saw her teeth gleaming. "No. The more familiar I'm with someone, the more I can hear them from afar...but there are very little minds to worry about right now and when I'm with you, there's blissful silence."

"You like that huh?" I asked. I'm sure I would if I was in someplace crowded. I remember how tense she was in the cafeteria. It must have been nauseating...if vampires could get nauseous.

She met my eyes then with a measure of impatience. "Not really."

Hahaha, so she wanted to read my mind. It kind of sucked that she couldn't. It'd be nice to have her know just how intensely I felt for her.

But I liked having my thoughts to myself too.

"You know, that's how it is for the rest of us," I commented.

"Spare me the lecture, Clark Kent," She snapped playfully. I laughed.

We kept walking for a while in companionable silence. She held her elbows up with her scarf wrapped around herself. From the outside, she looked delicate in that cute black dress and heels. She had perfect balance. Not a stain on her. It seemed impossible that she was out feeding off humans tonight. I cringed a bit. She seemed to be the perfect bait, I supposed. I wanted desperately to hold her hand...to touch her. I'd be prepared for the touch now. I remembered her discomfort. I wanted to ease it out of her.

"This is taking a while. And I don't want you to be late," She said. She actually did what I had wanted to do so badly. She reached down and grasped my hand. The cold touch sent a jolt through me.

"Sorry," I said, hating that I was probably too slow for her. I looked down at our joined hands, curious as to why she took it and what she was planning.

She smiled. "I'm going to run. Just go through the motions of running with me and you'll be fine. Whatever you do, don't stop unless you feel me slowing down and stopping myself, okay? Otherwise, it's likely I'll rip your arm off. And I like you in tact, all right?"

She spoke so casually about this.

"Won't we be seen?" I muttered anxiously, looking over my shoulder.

"Shh," She said, using her other hand to draw close and press a cold finger to my lips. I resisted the urge to kiss it...or nip it. "Trust me."

Heh. "All right."

I braced myself as we turned to the side with Bella ahead, preparing my muscles to run. "Maybe I should stretch first."

"Haha," She said, not aware that I was serious.

And she took off.

It was like flying. The passing buildings, the street lamps and faded colors of the cars blurred past me. I was reminded heavily of Star Wars when the ships jumped into hyperspace, making the stars become lines of white and yellow. That's what it felt like. I could see Bella ahead of me. Her hard, pale skin like a ghost in the darkness.

But I moved my legs in a running pattern so I didn't lose my arm or any other part of my body like she suggested. I couldn't even see her feet moving. I couldn't even see the stars above.

Finally, she released me and I staggered backwards, dazed. I almost fell but something behind me steadied me. My truck. The blinking stars I saw were the restaurant lights of La Bella Italia. Bella was also there, her hands on my arms.

"Are you all right?" She asked me from a long distance.

"I see chickens and stars dancing around my head," I told her before focusing on her fully. My hair was probably in complete disarray and I was astonished to find her completely unscathed by her method of transportation. My head was only just now starting to come back down to earth.

She laughed, such a tinkling sound and reached up to take my face between her hands. I thought she was going to kiss me...and I wanted to pull her into it, but she just looked down at my chest and closed her eyes. She inhaled deeply. A minute passed...My heartbeat sped up...And then...

She dropped her hands and pulled away.

"Bella?" I asked.

"Goodbye, Edward. I might see you at school tomorrow. Sleep well tonight," She smiled up at me one last time before she began walking towards her car. I could see the glass splayed across the lot and remembered by display of anger earlier tonight.

"Sorry about that," I said when she passed it. "I'll see you Bella. I hope I do see you tomorrow. I really do."

She gave me a slightly crooked smile. "I hope so too, Edward."

She climbed into her Volvo and drove off. I caught a glimpse of her tiny wave in the mirror before she left me behind her in awe.


	10. AUTHOR'S NOTE

A/N**: I HAVE NOT GIVEN UP ON THIS STORY!**

I have been severely lacking muse on it, and busy with other things.

But as it is a general rule for me not to complete stories, haha, I will make it a point to update this soon once more and get the ball rolling like I once did. I am sorry to anyone who was looking forward to updates. BUT I WILL RETURN.

**I'M MAKING SURE OF IT. AND YOU CAN KILL ME IF I DON'T(NOT LITERALLY THOUGH CAUSE THEN I DEFINITELY WILL NOT BE UPDATING. LOL. I AM SO FUNNY.)**

Luffs.**  
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